Club etiquette

As a long-time lurker, first-time caller, I'm worried to shift the subject matter from our standard fare (a fare I quite like, I'll have you know) to something more, I dunno, mainstream. But here's the thing that's been bugging me (well, one of them; I'll tell you about the other debauched discoveries in another note): in the past couple of weeks, I've stumbled into a swing club in NYC a couple of times (all due to the sheer luck of having a couple of pretty cool friends, I might add). What glorious hedonism! What fun! I love just finding all of these people seeking pleasure together. And I love being one of them. But I'm still puzzled about the etiquette. What do you do when that boyhood fantasy turns into reality? Because I've seen some examples of people I don't want to be. I don't want to be that creepy Russian dude. And I don't want to be the couple in the corner, watching but not touching. And I'm happy to venture my hands onto whatever passes my way. But I'm reluctant to ask for more for fear I'd be that pushy guy. So here's the puzzle, I suppose: how do strike that fine balance between looking for what you want and not coming on too strong?

Use the force Luke.
Eye contact and body language will speak volumes if you are listening.