Swinging Lifestyle--Could You?

Some men go to swingers clubs believing that they'd like to try it; namely 3ways, 4somes, watchin' and wackin' to some girl-on-girl, etc...Nice when it's just you "getting some", huh?

How many men would be "OK" watching their wives, girfriends, or SO's having their orifices stuffed with dick other than their own? If she all of a sudden became "excited" by the prospect of "new dick...better dick....BIGGER dick!" would that be OK?
  • npita
  • 01-25-2011, 10:46 AM
Not me. I'd be up for my fiancee and another woman, but not her and another guy. Since my fiancee doesn't seem to have an interest in women, nor seeing me with another woman, I guess that's a no all around.
pmdelites's Avatar
been there, done that, have the stains on my boxers.

in my opinion and limited experience, for it to work out well both partners have to be pretty damn confident in themselves AND their relationship. forcing or co-ercing your partner to attend is a script for the relationship hitting rocking roads.

if she's getting some really good new dick and is enjoying it, but you starting getting worried about if she's going to stay with you, then what does that say about your confidence in your relationship with her?? if she's getting that and wants to leave you to enjoy all that new dick, then what does that say about her confidence in her relationship with you??

it's not for everyone, but there are lots and lots of folks in the swinging lifestyle! the last time i went to 13th floor, there were several couples there from out of town to attend a NASCAR event at TMC. cool, i get that folks are into cars zooming around a track. but, the couples were also swingers and made it a point to research and visit the 13th floor to have lots of fun. and believe me, she was having as much fun that evening as she could enjoy in several hours. i believe more fun than he got. but, he told me [as we watched her go down on my date while another woman went down on her from behind] - "she loves it, i love her. why not??" "more power to you two," i replied as i moved into bunny style w/ the 3rd woman.
elgato111's Avatar
It is right, the relationship must be solid for both partners if they are going to swing. My experience, limited also, was a private party of mostly married partners.

Talking with both of them separately I learned that it was just fun, not anything else and most of them said it made their relationship better in many ways. Plus they never got bored with each other away from the swinging.

For me personally, I don't think I could watch my SO with several guys having a good time without me. Would not mind her with other women, and of course me as well in the mix.
Read my last review of Dragonfly. Really was lots of fun. Does take some self confidence and understanding though
gptxman's Avatar
This is an every weekend thing for the wife and I and we both enjoy all aspects of it.

I don't have any problems with my SO getting some. When she can find the right guy that really turns her on and can fuck her very well it is even better. It is very common for her to hook up with several guys she has met since starting to swing. Sometimes we are together and I watch or don't watch and sometimes she is off on her own having fun.

You wouldn't be here if either don't get any at home or you like to experience different women. Not think if you feel this way your SO doesn't. I bet she is off doing the same (fucking others) as you already if you feel the need to. I believe it is true in all relationships that both partners will cheat eventually if there is not a way for them to deal with curiosity and the desire of others.

Swinging brings to a relationship the ability to freely enjoy ourselves with others (sexually & non-sexually) with out it causing marriage problems. For us it has allowed us to become closer and has made our relationship better than it ever was. We have lots of swinging couples we know with and they all say the same thing about it making their relationships better.

On a side note there are couples that we see in the clubs that we won't mess with. You can tell these couples have issues and we just don't like to deal with them. Most of the time we have found their issues are caused by one partner (sometimes the man and sometimes the woman) pushing the other into swinging. This will never work. It has to be something both want to do or it won't be fun for both and it won't work.
I love the thought of my SO being sexy with another partner; however my self confidence may not allow me to pull the trigger on it. We've talked about it a few times, but i think she can tell i'm not comfortable with myself just yet.
We don't go to a lot of swinger clubs, but we are active in the lifestyle with various friends who visit with us and/or host parties. It takes a great love for sex and an understanding of the difference between commitment and recreation.
Charlie Brown's Avatar
I too have experienced the couples swinging and without a doubt, your partner really needs to be your friend as well.

You really need to be willing to give your partner that freedom to fuck another without jealousy or regret. That first time might test you but if you can deal with it together, it's a whole 'nother world of sexual fun like no other!
  • MRMR
  • 01-25-2011, 04:20 PM
I have had the opportunity to visit the 13th floor a few years ago with one of the Ladies here. Great time and No strings/relationship to screw up.
On the otherhand there is NO way my SO would go for this and honestly it would be difficult to see us dealing with this together. I agree that it is for some and not all.
pmdelites's Avatar
rn_sweetie wrote...
We don't go to a lot of swinger clubs, but we are active in the lifestyle with various friends who visit with us and/or host parties. It takes a great love for sex and an understanding of the difference between commitment and recreation.
Charlie Brown wrote...
I too have experienced the couples swinging and without a doubt, your partner really needs to be your friend as well.

You really need to be willing to give your partner that freedom to fuck another without jealousy or regret. That first time might test you but if you can deal with it together, it's a whole 'nother world of sexual fun like no other!
rn and charlie,

that is about the best summation i've read about swinging and real life relationships. esp. the sentences i bolded.!!

committment and recreation - that is just about the best distinction i've read.
BenderUnit's Avatar
Some people are polygamous, and some people are monagous.

It's a sexual orientation--like gay and straight.

Nobody need be ashamed of being made either way.

(That wasn't intended as a pun, but I rather like how it came out...)
Poly != Swinging. Poly usually involves more of an emotional connection in addition to (if not instead of) a sexual experience.

Just sayin'
FishGuy13's Avatar
First I am single / not with anyone right now, but yeah I think I could do it. There was a country song out not too long ago 'Dance with who you will, but I know she is coming home with me.' When my ex and I went to clubs we were both ok with the other dancing with the whole room and we were secure enough with each other to know we are going home with the one we came with. ... I think if it was the type where you meet in a large room and then split off as couples to private rooms would be easier than group sex with other partners. I am not sure I'd really know until I was in the middle of it or after and we both had time to think.
Some men go to swingers clubs believing that they'd like to try it; namely 3ways, 4somes, watchin' and wackin' to some girl-on-girl, etc...Nice when it's just you "getting some", huh?

How many men would be "OK" watching their wives, girfriends, or SO's having their orifices stuffed with dick other than their own? If she all of a sudden became "excited" by the prospect of "new dick...better dick....BIGGER dick!" would that be OK? Originally Posted by txcwby6
sure why not? why can't we all just get along and have fun without feeling like we OWN anyone else? it's not all about sex anyways.