Just met a very potential sugarbaby that's in dire need of financial help and is very vulnerable right now. This is my first time doing something like this so I don't know what the protocol is. It sounds like she wants to date for companionship and also make money at the same time. We had our first date the other day and she's already asking me if I want to hang out today and on the weekend. When do I start helping her financially? How long do I take to get to know her? Is she expecting me to give her a little something to show my commitment first? What kind of donation is expected for the first offering? Any help here would be appreciated either from men or women about this and anything in general I should know.
Thanks.
Originally Posted by MBS550
Set clear boundaries. I don't know your situation or how you met her, but it sounds like she's into you somewhat... As has been mentioned, talk. Understand her needs, then get a feel for what she's willing to give or do. Don't take her to the limits of what she's willing, back off from that limit a bit. You should come out of the negotiation part feeling as though both have gained from it.
This is the tricky part with meeting a sugar baby who is in dire need. You don't want her to feel like you are taking advantage of her, but you also shouldn't put yourself out on a limb. If she needs a large sum of money up front, you should be very wary of the situation. Do not feel obligated to meet her needs, if it makes you uncomfortable. If you trust her and feel OK with advancing the money, make it clear what your expectations are for this.
I usually set clear "rules" on how things will work and set expectations for both parties. I travel quite a bit, if I'm out of town, she can expect the same amount of money that I give as "allowance", but the number of sessions will accrue and we will catch up when I'm back in town. She will make honest attempts to accommodate me, as I have advanced her allowances while I was out of town to ensure that her income is stable. She is responsible for her finances, any emergencies, unforseen expenses will not be taken care of me. If she wants me to take care of them, we will make a separate deal on top of the existing one.
As for your side... If this is something you would like as a long term arrangement,
say what you will do, and do what you say you will. Biggest complaints I hear from SBs are that SDs are flakes. Of course, this doesn't keep them from being flakes, but keeping up your side of the bargain means that they will trust you and will not fear dealing with you again. This should be the way you deal regardless of if you intend on making this long term or short term, but it needs to be mentioned for some.