Let's talk about screening

A lot of us vets have the ability to set up appointments very quickly because we have been on the Board and the ladies know us.

But I think screening is one of the scariest things for a new hobbyist. Think about it, a provider or a service such as P411 may have to call your place of employment to verify you are who you say you are.

I'd like to start a discussion about screening for 2 reasons

Ladies, you need to be doing it. It's like Russian Roulette or fighting terrorism, you only have to be wrong ONCE, but if you neglect to screen you're not even trying. (I may have overstepped, but imagine how we'd feel reading about one of our ladies being murdered which happened just last year).

Gents, you need to be understanding when you're screened. These ladies are doing this to protect themselves AND YOU. So I would like for the ladies and guys to chime in and give us an overview.

Please let us know:

If we don't have provider references, how can we get verified (yes P411 is a big help)?

If you must call our place of employment to verify, a brief description of how the phone call would go.

If your P411 membership is no longer active do your OKs still show up?

What other services are out there guys can use to help you ladies screen us?

Any other additional insights from ladies and guys I missed would be appreciated. I would also appreciate this thread being on point and positive. This is probably the single biggest "safety" issue we'll encounter and we need to help each other.

Calling work...no bueno. Anonymity for many is key.

If a provider chooses not to see me even if I have recent reviews and can contact providers I have seen...well I’ll just move my business elsewhere.

MLR, I thunk we got the screening covered. A lady should not be telling a hobbyist how we conduct our business. Especially in open forum for the world to see
Each lady conducts her business differently according to her preferences.

MLR, I thunk we got the screening covered. A lady should not be telling a hobbyist how we conduct our business. Especially in open forum for the world to see
Each lady conducts her business differently according to her preferences. Originally Posted by Kynsley Morgan

KM you are correct some of the "trade secrets" need to be kept well, secret. Where I was going with this post is a general overview and some assurance that you ladies know how to do this, and there is no harm in being screened.

It's kind of the old saying "I can't get a lady to see me because I don't have references, but how can I get references if I can't see a lady?"

This post is meant to educate that there isn't anything to be afraid of when a lady wants to check you out for her safety. And maybe things that make this easier on everyone involved.

I have no doubt that you can offer a lot of insight that will help put the new guys at ease that screening can be done professionally and for the most part harmlessly.

I have been thru the screening process with a few providers and i have yet to come across a request for verification that to me was too invasive or couldn't be handled in another manner. No 2 providers have done it exactly the same way yet either. Patience is definitely a virtue in this matter. Safety of all parties is paramount. The screening process, to me, is just part of getting acquainted, and makes the experience easier to relax and enjoy.

I do not do references because I could care less of an experience you had with another lady.
I want to speak to you over the phone, and ask you questions as I explain what I am looking for.
Majority of men are one sided with safety.
Some seem to think their safety is more important, when actually it is a 2 way street and a ladies is just a little more so important because a life is at stake.
Our side of the game is EXTREMELY dangerous.

SSBK and KM, good points one advantage of screening is it does give the parties a chance to "get to know each other". I personally like to talk to a new provider I see on the phone if possible and just "chat" for a few minutes.

Safety is important for all parties, but so is compatibility. A phone conversation is a good way to establish both.

Kensley, would you be willing to share some tips that would make your job easier, such as what information to have in the initial PM or email and are there other sites similar to P411 that you as a provider put stock in?

I frankly get sick of a-typical one sentences of availability.
Or stupid pms about not showing enough of something.

I do not correspond via PM (paper trail)
And I only deal with booking forms completely filled out, followed by a PM for validation and a phone call.

KM, if I follow what you are saying is that although all providers are different, it seems a good starting point on setting an appointment and getting screened is provide ALL of the requested information in your initial contact. I get the impression that if nothing else it shows the lady you thought enough about her to READ ALL of her profile/website and made an effort to to do as she asked. RESPECT is a great first impression.

it shows a certain respect level that the man cares enough about the lady in what she has to say, and how she conducts her business.
WE should NOT have to pull teeth or have a constant PM or email or text conversation, when it can simply be taken care of in one transaction

I like to meet for coffee first because most that I have been around are really professional and love to eat and drink on me..

Coffee dates are awesome for newbies, but still compensate the ladies time

I understand that completely, but one lady licked her bowl of banana pudding, another used a tooth pick, one wanted cookies to take her mother. I mostly fly UTR but I helped one lady get a job and she still works at it. JMO

OBTW I also gave them money when I met for coffee.

I only did coffee and the 1st meeting i had my foot hanging out his door ready to run.