When is a reference too old?

Thoughts on this:

When is a reference too old to use?

I had a guy recently, who said he seen me years ago, had a story that I went to the wrong door first or something and I didn't have a clue who he was. Even if I did, a reference from years ago? Not safe to me

I say under a year is a good cut off time, Some clients will use your name for years and years only because they know your very well known. If your not contributing to my pocket book, why should I help you get pussy?

Again, it's MY way of doing my thing..what's yours? And why?

I wouldn’t feel comfortable asking a provider for a reference if I had not seen them within a year like you stated. That would be a bit disrespectful to her and I would think that could inhibit a lady from seeing someone using references that old as well. And you’re looking amazing!

I agree with Elvis on this. Far using references, I use the last 2 I saw. Use me as an example, if I tried using a year old reference wouldn't offend me if you text me saying it's been awhile since we have seen each other. I would hope I got the hint.

I've had people try and use me as a reference from years ago.

I realize that providers MUST be safe. On my side, I get a disabiliy check once a month and can not use it in 1.5=2 hoursf selfish fun I have to take care of youngun 1st

I realize giving references is a pain and a chore, but ladies keep in mind some NICE lady, likely helped you with references, to help put $$ in your pocket.

Yes, we guys should try and use our most REASONABLE recent references, that would be great in a perfect world.

If you are provider and you have hardcore RULES about helping provide references.....PLEASE state your rules and regulations here and now, CLEARLY, so us pain in the ass guys can and do abide by your RULES. Yes we get it, y'all run the show. If that makes you feel empowered, hell I will tell you that all the time.

I would like to sincerely thank all the NICE providers who have been so kind to help me with references in the past. I do APPRECIATE the help. THANK YOU, THANK YOU

I THOUGHT I might play today, but I hate to trouble some one for references, guess I will just go and make a saving deposit. See how good that is for biz.

Have a nice day

Honestly, I don’t get it. References cant possibly be that hard to handle. I can type a one or two sentence text message or email in about 10-15 sec. and say you get 50 req for references....now we are talking about 12 min. is that really that much of your day to help someone out?

I will tell a gal if its been over a year that it's been that long BUT he was good when I saw him

DallasRain, and the OP's thought of a year, are being kind in allowing references up to a year.
Of course it's a safety and respect thing.
For the guys, unless you've seen a gal at least a few times, how can you realistically expect her to remember you unless it's very recent? Impossible. Does anyone really want gals to maintain lists? Hell no.
Gal's, if you cant remember a guy, that's on him, not you.
Although a courtesy thing, it is a business courtesy thing.
To close, a lot of gals have 3 month cutoffs, and that's posted in their bio or private website.
But, some gals will allow fav repeat clients references for a much longer time frame as part of their arrangement.
For the guys, after a few months, how will she remember you? Did you see her more than once or twice? What gift did you bring? etc.

I think for most providers, industry standard is about 6 months - 1 year.

DallasRain, and the OP's thought of a year, are being kind in allowing references up to a year.
Of course it's a safety and respect thing.
For the guys, unless you've seen a gal at least a few times, how can you realistically expect her to remember you unless it's very recent? Impossible. Does anyone really want gals to maintain lists? Hell no.
Gal's, if you cant remember a guy, that's on him, not you.
Although a courtesy thing, it is a business courtesy thing.
To close, a lot of gals have 3 month cutoffs, and that's posted in their bio or private website.
But, some gals will allow fav repeat clients references for a much longer time frame as part of their arrangement.
For the guys, after a few months, how will she remember you? Did you see her more than once or twice? What gift did you bring? etc. Originally Posted by Unique_Carpenter

Yes! This is spot on!

I realize giving references is a pain and a chore, but ladies keep in mind some NICE lady, likely helped you with references, to help put $$ in your pocket.

Yes, we guys should try and use our most REASONABLE recent references, that would be great in a perfect world.

If you are provider and you have hardcore RULES about helping provide references.....PLEASE state your rules and regulations here and now, CLEARLY, so us pain in the ass guys can and do abide by your RULES. Yes we get it, y'all run the show. If that makes you feel empowered, hell I will tell you that all the time.

I would like to sincerely thank all the NICE providers who have been so kind to help me with references in the past. I do APPRECIATE the help. THANK YOU, THANK YOU

I THOUGHT I might play today, but I hate to trouble some one for references, guess I will just go and make a saving deposit. See how good that is for biz.

Have a nice day Originally Posted by challenger340

Who made you upset and didn’t give you a reference?

If there is an Industry Standard, please cite the Sanctioning Association.
Didn't know this was an Industry. . .

Examples of Sanctioning Associations recognized include but are not limited to:

• National Fire Protection Association (NFPA)
• American National Standards Institute (ANSI)
• International Organization for Standardization (ISO)
• Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers (IEEE)

6 months is cutting it short. One year is reasonable. I recently used a provider for a reference that I had seen within 6-7 months. She informed me that if I planned on using her as a reference that I needed to see her again. That’s BS IMO.

Lemme ask, when does a guy need references? There are guys like me, who's been on this board since its inception. We're talking a decade in, for those that haven't done the math. I want to see a girl who's been here for four months, and she tells me I need references.

Now, I understand that she's been taught well, maybe shown the ropes by another provider or whatnot. But everything you'd need to know about what kind of guy I am is on this board.

I should be asking HER for references, I say.

I post this not with an ill-tempered tone, but with one of reason...and was wondering what you guys thought.