The Doubles Project

Man, I love team sports. The thrill of competition. Upping your game when facing those more skilled than you. Bettering yourself. Finding that last ounce of performance deep within yourself to help you win.

Yeah. Guys....remember that damn offensive tackle you just couldn't beat? No matter what you tried....the jukes.....the spins....he was always hanging on you like a cheap suit. What did you resort to? That's right...trash talking. Get in the guy's head. Piss him off. Cause him to get sloppy. Sometimes it worked....and sometimes he just kept kicking your ass.

Team sports. Love 'em.

In this hobby, the nearest thing we've got to team sports is doubles. There's a lot of talent in our fair state. And there's a LOT of competition out there for the guy's hobby dollars.

And......there's a lot of trash talkin' going on out there, too. Y'all know what I'm talkin' 'bout. And trash-talk is ok.......it's part of the game.

In my own personal mind, I believe I already know who the best doubles team in the state is.....I've already fantasy-reviewed them. But, in the intervening months, I have to admit I've had some intruiging other combinations proposed to me. I'm a big enough man to admit I may be wrong......but I don't think so.

So, I have a fantasy.....a fantasy doubles league. In this fantasy, 3 or 4 teams of ladies would compete for the title "Best Doubles Team." If my past favorite team wishes to be considered, they would also have to enter, but one would have to "un-retire" briefly. Ladies could enter their team by contacting me by PM. After having seen all 3 or 4 teams, I publish all reviews at the same time. Can't have any of that Bill Belichek "scouting" shit going on.

Some rules? Well, fantasy reviews here have to be posted within 30 days of the actual event. So all 3 or 4 encounters would have to happen within a 4 week period. LOL....and I'd need time to recover between sessions. And (for MY comfort level) at least one member of every team would have to have a P411 listing.

I would propose a set team price for this fantasy.....One hour for 5 bills. (would this be enough to compensate two ladies who are taking the risk they may end up in last place? Too little for those who might win? Don't know and could use some input here.)

Teams could be judged on things like energy, passion, inventiveness, attitude, and MSOG (real challenge with me). I could use some input here as well. It's only fair that the teams know what they would be scored on before play starts. With only one judge (me), at least there would be a common frame of reference. However, if one or more other board members had the resources to see the same 3 or 4 teams in the same time frame, it would make for a better contest.

Thoughts? Is there a snowball's chance in hell that I could get 3 or 4 teams of ladies that would take me up on this?

With all the trash talk out there, one would think so.

I must've missed the trash talk. Where can I find it?

Do the winners get a trophy and plaque? The plaque can say, "Best Hooker Doubles Partner of Omaha." YAY!!! I can hang that over my mantel and then show it off to your kids.

Why stop there, we can have a best hooker award too.

What is consider the best by one or three people may not hold true for others. Each lady has different qualities that appeal to different people. What you may like, others may not.

If you're willing to hurt some ladies feelings because you didn't find them the best, go for it. But, you might end up on some DNS lists for making the other ladies feel and/or look bad.

But just think about it, you could use these awards in your advertising, say maybe on BP or P411!

Do the winners get a trophy and plaque? The plaque can say, "Best Hooker Doubles Partner of Omaha." YAY!!! I can hang that over my mantel and then show it off to your kids.

Why stop there, we can have a best hooker award too. Originally Posted by MsElena

No thank you. I don't need a title like that to advertise. My reputation and reviews, plus word of mouth from other clients speaks volumes.

Wow. What a shitstorm. I really was just trying to have some fun.

Folks, I got a real problem here.....one I'm just now finally plumbing the depths on.

I really like two ladies.....and I've been trying to ride both sides of the fence.......and now I've got bulls charging me in both pastures. I'm really not a mean guy....just clumsy I guess. So I'm going to solve this the best way I know how. I'm going to cut and run. Just a few words before I go.

Ms Elena: Despite what many say, I think you're nice person and a great provider. I've enjoyed our times together. I want to publicly apologise for any angst or humiliation that my posts or actions may have caused. No harm or insult was ever intended. Good luck to you.

Ms Lady Y. I know you can't post here.....but you read these pages. I truly believe you've been wronged.....but not by who you think. You are a nice person, too....and also a wonderful provider. I've enjoyed our times together as well. When I saw MsE.....It was not done to spite you. I want to publicly apologise for any angst or humiliation that my posts or actions may have caused. No harm or insult was ever intended. Good luck to you.

I really wish that everyone would apply Hanlon's Razor to my posts. I know thats too much to ask.....but it always helped me out in my dealings with others.

I guess I'll stick to Denver from now on. So long, folks.

If I misread your post, I'll be the first to apologize.

I took it as a contest that would only cause hurt feelings towards some ladies. In a contest such as this, its never a good thing to post out in the open forums because it will cause a little drama with females AND males. I remember seeing a contest kinda like this on the old ASPD, in another city of course and boy, that went over like a ton of bricks. Ladies were hurt, ticked off and some refused to see guys who voted.

Holding a contest such as this on a board where only a handful of hobbyists would write the reviews and vote isn't fair. Ten people can't speak for 300 hobbyists.

If you were joking about the contest, I didn't get the joke and I apologize.


HGrits, I wish you wouldn't leave the board because your posts have always been appreciated. With that said, you don't have bulls charging you at both directions, at least its not me. I sent you a PM telling you how I felt about your post following my review you wrote. I feel that you shouldn't have to apologize to anyone for seeing me or any other lady you choose to see. There's not one escort, hooker, provider who owns you or any other hobbyist and you as the paying client have the right to see whomever you wish whether it upsets another lady or not. If a provider is trying to dictate who you see, its time to take a break from her, if she's upset because you saw another lady and you got an OK or wrote a review of her, its time to take a break from her. If the ladies aren't mature enough to realize that, that's their problem and not yours. Speaking in general terms of course. Actions like that will cause men not to write reviews, share opinions for fear of backlash from certain providers and that isn't what this board is about.

No provider should be "laying claim" to a hobbyist.

The hobby world is a small world and if guys can't share their reviews, opinions or recommend without the fear of backlash, then we all better pack up our things and move on. If the guys wanted backlash from a woman, it'd be their wife or GF not some hooker who is supposed give pleasure, not grief.

I could care less who you or any other hobbyist on this board sees. There are numerous clients that Lady Y and I share, and there are not any problems with those gents. I don't talk about her and I'm sure she isn't speaking of me......at least I hope she isn't. I have no problems with guys who wish to see Lady Y, why would I? Just as she shouldn't have a problem with guys wanting to see me.

My biggest concern has and will always be the safety of both hobbyists and providers. Any other time, my concern is spent on how to make sure my clients are happy and completely fulfilled.

hgritstoo: I certainly didn't think anything on this thread was kicking up any sort of storm. It seemed like a pretty even keel discussion.

It's always so easy to read things and take them wrong when you can't hear inflection and such, especially as we all seem to post on here in a conversational manner.

I enjoy your contributions, even if I don't organize a thought or response to all of them. You have fun on here and like to share. Keep it up, bro!

Yo, grits,

I've been gone for a bit so I don't know what's going on. That said, I've enjoyed and appreciated your input and it would be a shame to see you leave.

Besides, I appreciate your choice of reading, you grock? By the way, didn't ole' Lazarus also advise "Always store beer in a cool dark place." and "Never argue with a woman. Even if you win, you lose."?

Peace, bro. Stick around.

Gee Whiz, skins have gotten thin since I last lingered in these parts. C'mon guys, make nice.

Nice to see you in these parts JB. Staying out of trouble?

Elena trying to run the show and steps in it again. She has run off as many providers as she could from the board, now she is moving on to hobbyists. A provider troll, who knew?

Omahansa, I'm going to address you one time and that's it. You seem to be the one trolling and wanting to get some type of reaction out of me.

1. If you don't like me, don't address me....don't talk to me. I'm totally fine with that.

2. I don't run people off. The Nebraska forum never had a lot of providers posting in it to begin with. Its not my fault that some people don't have thick skin and take this board 100% serious. There are others who are way worse than me when it comes to a posting style. I wish more ladies would post, I wish more ladies would join the board and advertise for you guys. I don't see the other ladies as competition because there's a jack for every jill. I want there to be other ladies to talk to on here, to joke with and flirt with.

3. If you don't like my posts, put me on ignore and you won't see my posts. Sorry I don't suffer fools gladly.

4. Stating my opinion isn't "trying to run the show." If that's the case, then there's a lot of folks on this board who are trying to run the board.

5. Hgrits named two people who were "charging at him like a bull." So, lets not place all the blame on me. I had a conversation with him, it didn't go the way he liked. He felt like he was caught in between something, I responded to his post telling him that in my opinion he wasn't in the middle of anything.

6. His post was supposed to be a joke, I failed to see it as a joke and I apologized. But, I wasn't the only one who failed to see the humor.

If someone can't handle a person speaking their mind, that's their problem, not mine. This board is for sharing information, people connecting, people having discussions, etc. If you can't handle a person sharing their opinion, then I suggest not to post. That would avoid the drama you seem to think I create.

Omahansa, I do appreciate and I am flattered by how much you think of me and keep track of my posting. You seem to have a problem with aggressive women and decide to lash at me when you feel a need to do so. That's too bad, because I'm sure in your real life.....you're not quite the prick you portray on the board.

The internet doesn't allow for true intentions or feelings to come across as we all would wish. Things can be taken the wrong way, misconstrued. You and others think I'm like the big bad wolf, but that's not the case. I'm actually quite nice, would do almost anything for a person in need and am very protective of my friends.....I just don't put up with crap, I don't sit back, look pretty and keep my mouth shut as most men wish the ladies would do with the exception of having a cock in their mouth.

Have a wonderful evening and week.

I have to agree you do run people off. Your petty, bossy, snobby and controlling.Then you try and come off all high and mighty. Heck you even had a post a few days ago telling people how to spend their money "on the whole bi thing". Get over your self, for someone who claims to be so busy seeing clients you sure are always on here.

Typical - why is it everyone lacks a sense of humor? I thought Grits post was funny, but I have a twisted sense of humor. As for Elena's response - some players prefer individual, one-on-one competition...a simple "guess you won't be forming a team" would have probably been sufficient. Geez...lighten up!

I can't even stop fucking up without fucking up. It's like tracking dogshit halfway across the living room carpet.

..........I had a conversation with him, it didn't go the way he liked....... Originally Posted by MsElena

Pretty well worded. And it's what precipitated this whole thing.....but not for reasons most of you think. For the record, MsE. is NOT chasing me away.

I'm a pretty simple guy motivated by two things: Pussy.....and the desire to do no harm. The pinnacle of naivete'? Perhaps. I'm pretty green still.

I am on no one's side, but my own. All the intrigue, secret whisperings, snide remarks......I have fastidiously tried to avoid them and failed.....to the point where even by doing that I'm hurting other peoples feelings......and I never wanted to do that. The "two bulls" are largely of my own creation. I've been trying to walk on eggshells around here, worrying if I am making someone feel bad, and just making things worse. It's to the point where I've got ladies I've never met in cities I've never visited sending me emails begging me not to mention their names in my posts. So, I'm just gonna shut the fuck up, and that's it. NO ONE is at fault here, or has done anything wrong, or is putting pressure on me, except ME.

So please, If you feel the need to jump on MsE, it should be for one purpose and one purpose only. And folks.....this is a hooker board. If you don't get THAT one, then y'all are really a lost cause.

Hanlon's Razor, folks. Look it up.

And I'm probably STILL trackin' dogshit......

Mods: Marcus, for once in your lazy, shiftless life....would you please put down the popcorn and close and lock this damned thread? Thank you.