How to be a better client?

How do you guys relax around a provider? I always have a hard time relaxing and feeling comfortable. I seem to always be really awkward at first and have never had a connection with any provider. It's made one night stands seem intimate. The sessions always seem mechanical but I don't think it's the providers fault

Well, if you don't connect with ANY providers and you have seen more than one or two, you might consider that the problem is you. Here are a couple of things to always keep in mind:
1. Always be clean.
2. Keep pre-appointment contact respectful.
3. Smile, it's infectious
4. Compliment her when you show up.
5. Check her showcase and bring her a gift that she will appreciate.
6. Respect her limits and make sure that she is aware of yours prior to the session.
If you follow these rules, there is no reason that you should not have good sessions in my opinion, but of course, you know what they say about opinions.

7. Show up on time (and leave on time).
8. Get the donation paid immediately.

As with anything in life, it gets easier with practice. Providers who advertise as "Newbie Friendly" probably do so in part because they're confident in their ability to quickly put a newbie at ease and get on to the fun. They're open and non-judgemental (by and large) and would actually appreciate an advance exchange with you that you'll be walking in with a case of the jitters. They'll then know to crank up the GFE to get you in the groove.

Best of luck! Have fun and stay safe!

You might catch some static for using words like “connection” and “intimate” around these parts – I have the sense that many clients are in it for a purely physical thrill-ride and will look down upon anyone who expresses social/emotional needs. But some get where you’re coming from and are in the same place.

The sad truth is you may be looking for something in the wrong place – if you want a deep emotional connection that only comes from a real relationship. If you want a more comfortable experience – not true intimacy but a less awkward encounter – that’s probably do-able, and I’ll give you a few tips:

First, find a provider who’s known to be more social and isn’t straight-to-business. It’s pretty much the same as finding a barber or bartender who will chat and socialize, not just cut your hair and serve your drinks. Some providers like to take a bit of time to get to know you before the action starts – if you read provider reviews, some reviewers will comment on that. It’s generally the more mature providers who cater to more than the basics – the teenage PSE fuckdoll type is focused entirely on the physical activities and isn’t much for conversation.

A specific recommendation based on my own experience is SA Angel – my first visit with her, we sat on the couch and chatted for a good twenty minutes, and she let me know that the clock doesn’t start until we move to the bedroom. I’ve also had good social experiences with Enticing Orchids and Marjorie Steele in that regard. Not that there aren’t others (don’t want to sleight anyone I’ve forgotten), those are just the three that come to mind.

Second, book a longer session - an hour at least, maybe longer. If you go for a quick visit or half-hour, it’s strictly business and no time for small-talk before or after. The hour gives you time to relax and not feel pressured to get to work- and the provider wants you in-and-out because you’re not paying very much. Spend the money and don’t look at your watch or act disappointed when you spend 25 minutes of “your” hour chatting.

Third, be candid with the provider and let her know that you’re nervous and want to spend a little time getting to know one another first. Good providers cater to your needs and preferences if they know what those preferences are – but they are not mind-readers. But like any other activity in a session, you do have to tell them rather than hoping they will guess what you want, or they’ll fall back to their standard routine, which may not be what you want.

And last, seeing the same provider multiple times helps. Your second visit will be more casual than your first, your third better than your second, etc. I don’t do that often because I don’t hobby often and want variety rather than depth – but there are providers I’ve seen repeatedly and feel a bit more comfortable and intimate with.

That’s all I’ve got – perhaps a few others who’ve been in the hobby for longer can offer a bit more advice. Do let us know what you find – write reviews as you go and speak to more than just the physical activities in your ROS.

Besides all the other things already mentioned, sending an initial pm that talks a bit more about yourself and it is warmer than the "are you available?", goes a very long way establishing a rapport with the provider prior to the appt.

Best of luck!


Camille

I've met many guys who seem nervous in the beginning. I have always started with conversation and introductions - Finding a little about what a guy likes, and his interests. Once he realizes I have some interest in him as a person, things are a lot less awkward and the session flows more easily. This is why I find that short (less than 1 hour) sessions do not work for my style of service. I hate rushing.

As with anything in life, it gets easier with practice. Providers who advertise as "Newbie Friendly" probably do so in part because they're confident in their ability to quickly put a newbie at ease and get on to the fun. They're open and non-judgemental (by and large) and would actually appreciate an advance exchange with you that you'll be walking in with a case of the jitters. They'll then know to crank up the GFE to get you in the groove.

Best of luck! Have fun and stay safe! Originally Posted by CoverMe

Loved ALL the replies above but the quoted one here gives them all some extra umph. Well said people!

Actually engaging in conversation helps a great deal. I've had extremely nervous newbies and pride myself on my ability to ease them into our visit slowly and make them so comfortable it's as if they've known me for years. Many wonderful ladies here are able to do this quite well. But there is one specific type of noob, we have come to agree, which makes it the most difficult and a somewhat annoying task when putting them at ease....the ones who will NOT even try and engage in conversation and stay completely silent save the ocassional yes, no, ok, sure, I don't know...etc.

Speak up. Be confident and....well damn... human. We, providers together and individually, have some unique and awesome skills from A to Z but at least give us a foundation from which to begin, please.

KKA

Well, if you don't connect with ANY providers and you have seen more than one or two, you might consider that the problem is you. Here are a couple of things to always keep in mind:
1. Always be clean.
2. Keep pre-appointment contact respectful.
3. Smile, it's infectious
4. Compliment her when you show up.
5. Check her showcase and bring her a gift that she will appreciate.
6. Respect her limits and make sure that she is aware of yours prior to the session.
If you follow these rules, there is no reason that you should not have good sessions in my opinion, but of course, you know what they say about opinions. Originally Posted by Bbbj Receiver

6. Is huge. Respect and not putting her in a position to say No will make the comfort level that much better. Do your research a little. I.e. Don't ask for Greek if it's apparent she doesn't do it. Could be a mood killer.

7. Show up on time (and leave on time).
8. Get the donation paid immediately. Originally Posted by OldYeller

These two are super important also. 7. Respect that this is a business and you are paying for her time, not so much the deeds that happen. Remember. The best impression is monitoring yourself. And not having to be monitored and the situation made awkward by her saying times up, or you are going over. That could be a mood killer for next time. And maybe why she doesn't answer.

I see lots of guys reviews that said scheduled for an hour. But went over the time. That is something the guys should have respect enough for and not put or pressure a lady into. Yes. Maybe they didn't say it then. But respect their time. I guarantee it's in the back of their minds and maybe why you don't get seem a second time.

8. Don't make the lady have to ask. A gentlemen won't make a lady have to ask. It's s mutual business transaction that should be discreet. Get the business part out of the way. So you can have fun. I always use the Theme park analogy. You pay for the ticket to get in. And enjoy the rides.

Happy hunting sir. It's a fun playground here.

... Speak up. Be confident and....well damn... human ... Originally Posted by KlassyKelliAnn

Miss, surely you realize that many of the gents would not be purchasing basic human contact if they possessed confidence? That they often feel broken or "un-human"?
Now you would publicly chastise them further?

I chastise no one, please don't assume that is what I do or did. Suffice it to say, in my opinion that is, If they can make an appointment to have sex with a complete stranger, surely they can at the very least speak to that stranger. I'm talking about mere and simple small talk. If they can and do go through with everything else, a simple conversation shouldn't be so difficult.

Men are always talking providers simply going through the motions and not putting much else into a session. Many may think if men act in kind, we providers should and could care less because nevertheless we get paid.

Well, therein lies The difference.....many providers actually enjoy what they do, they do not HAVE to do what they do and they want to do what they do and all these things gives them more options, more choices and puts them in control.

Therefore, because we genuinely enjoy our chosen profession, we like and prefer it to be fun. So when you have done your damnest to put a person at ease etc, it can put a damper on your own fun too if they won't even talk making the entire situation uncomfortable and mechanical. Call me selfish, that's okay by me, but if I'm not having fun in a session it ain't worth it for either one of us.

Well spoken, all of the above.

Additionally, some providers have been known to or might be willing to spend a little conversating in person over the phone, or, even more so face to face even if only over a Starbux.

Or, to take the face-to-face contacting a bit further by meeting at local events.

Coverme nailed it. Takes a lot of experience and time before you get over the jitters. Good thing to know, it's normal and you're not alone. Took a few years myself in this hobby to feel confident before an appointment with someone new. Really helps that if you find someone u liked, to have a repeat visit. Chemistry is a development over time, not a one night thing as with any relationship, even here. Good thing is, the more you keep at it, the more it helps girls understand your needs and you start to learn things about them and what they like which can help your confidence when seeing new people.

Not sure I would invest a lot of time or money in multi hour sessions with someone you have never met. But a 1 hr is a perfect balance. You can cut it short if you're not feeling it without booking too much or her time along with not spending the cash on 2 or 3 hours. If you really enjoyed yourself with someone or want to continue exploring with a girl you liked, you know next time to go for longer. My first time with someone if I have never met, perhaps just some chit chat about myself and what info I included in my initial pm, maybe some wine, and whatever else happens. If I enjoy myself and appears they did too, longer engagements may come later. Just my 2 cents.

Also, take time to read many reviews. Lots of insight to be gained with them.

Sure, to be a better client, just make sure you do some of the things listed above regards to hygiene, session etiquette, and how to contact a lady. Donations can be handled whenever imo and never be discussed but never forget the donation is the key. Gets easier, and will hit some bumps along the way. Most importantly, as Camille says, stay safe and have fun.

Besides all the other things already mentioned, sending an initial pm that talks a bit more about yourself and it is warmer than the "are you available?", goes a very long way establishing a rapport with the provider prior to the appt.

Best of luck!


Camille Originally Posted by Camille Fox

Having a connection is fantasmic

Some would argue that the root of all human suffering is the gap between expectation and reality. While it may be a noble thing to "improve" one's reality, it is often a simple thing to alter one's expectation.

My expectation of a session: have fun! Everything else (and there are many "else's") falls in line behind this edict.

What are your expectations, OP?