New Private Forum Proposal

bored@home's Avatar
Shame on me for trying to offer it. Goodness. I must have really struck a cord in some of yalls asses. If you have a better idea - go with it! Originally Posted by thathottnurse
Don't let it get you down, you have a good idea. The problem you are seeing is one I face multiple times a week and it gets very irritating very quickly so I feel your pain. We have a "drive" in our company to fit the latest buzzword best practice to be "all inclusive"; the short version is to get feedback from all departments to guide design. I have become very familer with a term that I mutter to myself constantly when asked or advised of "features" to add or incorporate.
"A camel is a horse designed by committee...."
Check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Design_by_committee

In my plight, something that would take hours or days to build and implement now stretches to weeks or months.
An example; a simple timer would change the background color of a room on a basic bed board...first pass I chose red, yellow, and green. Now with "feedback" from all departments (including those who won't use the tool) I have 17 color scenarios with alternating text and have to incorporate a legend.
Mojojo's Avatar

Can you imagine if Gina had a P411 ad forum in each of the major cities where only providers who truly have a current P411 account could post ads? And control posting access of that forum?
! Originally Posted by LazurusLong
They do have an ad forum on p411.
Easiest thing to do... is just setup the basic forum and let the rest sort itself out.

My advice: Don't overthink it (this forum) or you will get lost in details and nothing will happen. Also, do remember, you'll never please everyone anyway so don't get caught in the "designed by consensus" trap.

Again, just do the basics first and evolve from there.
I like the Camel/ horse analogy.

Take the advice you asked for (realizing
It's worth what you paid for it) and
Do what YOU think is best. After all you are footing the
Bill Miss Bling Bling. My observation is you are a smart cookie, and I trust
You will get it right, or pretty Damn close.
You will never please everyone. Some people just like to criticize and bitch.
Aren't we here to have fun and fuck???
TinMan's Avatar
I think a simple general location tab added to this site (such as craigslist) would be easier to solve the location issue? Originally Posted by biglatinmale
A fair number of us have proposed changes similar to this. Thus far, no response. That's why I commend THN for putting her money where her mouth is (cue the bj jokes!) and trying to make it a reality.

As I said earlier, even if the forum doesn't reach it's promise, some good ideas may be generated that make their way to the Mother Board. Why not give it a shot and see what develops? The only thing at risk here is someone else's (THN's) money.

That's why I'm puzzled by some of the folks that have gone beyond devil's advocacy to outright hostility. If it's not your cup of tea, ignore this thread and the forum, when the latter comes to fruition.
Chevalier's Avatar
That's why I'm puzzled by some of the folks that have gone beyond devil's advocacy to outright hostility. If it's not your cup of tea, ignore this thread and the forum, when the latter comes to fruition. Originally Posted by TinMan
My comments were not intended as hostile to THN's plans, and my apologies if it was perceived that way. I suspect she vastly underestimates the difficulty of maintaining civil discussions at a level her community will like, and that will be a lot of disagreement about what is or is not "civil" once you move from ambiguous generalities to specific instances. It really is difficult to be objective about it. I suspect she will catch a fair amount of flak, from some for too heavy a hand and from others for too light a hand. But even if I'm right, that's not a reason not to try; merely a reason not to get her hopes up too high until she has six months or so to see how it develops. If my cautionary advice came across as overly critical or condescending or jaded or cynical, my apologies.

And I don't have an opinion one way or another about the approach to ads. She can, and should, do as she pleases.
LazurusLong's Avatar
They do have an ad forum on p411. Originally Posted by Mojojo
Sorry about my lack of clarity. I was discussing how anyone could sponsor a forum here on ECCIE like Amazing John did in Houston back on ASPD.

Revised:

Can you imagine if Gina had a P411 ad forum in each of the major cities here on ECCIE where only providers who truly have a current P411 account could post ads? And control posting access of that forum?

As it is right now, there are numerous examples where someone claims they are on P411 but the links are dead or they are just not on there at all. Whether Gina would care to or be interested in such a forum here on ECCIE who knows.
TinMan's Avatar
Chevalier, yours were not the posts that I meant when I said "hostile". In fact, most of the naysayers have kept it civil. There are a few, however, that just seem to have it in for THN, for whatever reason. Those were the few to whom I was directing that comment.

I'll go further and say that your cautionary advice should especially be heeded, since you've seen how the sausage was made back when you moderated the aspd boards. What I've taken from your posts is "I hope this works out the way you intend, but don't feel let down if it doesn't."

By the way, thanks for the earlier kudos. I'm glad my rants are infrequent enough to escape memory.
I love this idea THN. Please invite me when it takes flight.
Maintaining civility on the posts should not be that much of a problem if it is a separate by invitation only site. Just un-invite those that want to disrupt posts. There has been many times while reading some good posts I wished I could just push a button and the person disrupting the thread would disappear.
Some people are just hateful. They can't help themselves. No matter how well they are able to fool others or themselves, their true colors show thru over.....Time.

Their mentality doesn't change my plans whatsoever. The check is in the mail and the forum will procede despite the kicking and screaming of a few members who seem to have some personal issues to resolve within themselves (or maybe just some thicker skin so the ideas of others aren't so threatening). I hope they take an objective look back at this and try to gain some perspective on just how insidious they have allowed themselves to become in the hobby.

Its very motivating to know that most everyone who has responded in public or private sees this for what it is - a opportunity to improve the hobby community on someone else's time and dime! Tinman, as always, articulated the big picture quite well.

I'm hoping to have as many screened ladies and gents as possible in the forum! Obviously it needs traffic to be successful. Legally, I am opposed to reaping any financial benefit from the forum or any advertising it brings in. I don't like trouble - especially legal!

Considering some of the drama a few members have tried to stir up surrounding the forum, I will not discuss anymore details about its content or structure out here. All I can say from this point forward is that I will try to get out as many invites as possible as quickly as possible. The timeline in uncertain but I hope to be up and running by Feb 1st at latest.

Thank you again for your feedback, everyone! It's looking good!
Chevalier, I didn't take your comments to be hostile at all. To the contrary, there are many times when discussions get heated - people get passionate about their convictions. It happens. And rightly so.

What I am increasingly opposed to are the baiting, stalking and bullying temptations that some people can't seem to help themselves from acting on. They are like non-stop freight trains on a mission to destroy everyone who they dislike.

Yes, there will be people we don't agree with or like or think they are just plain dumb and we call them on it - its human nature. All I ask in the new forum is keep it to a minimum if you find it necessary at all. There have been some glaring examples in this thread alone. It doesn't take a genuis to spot it either. Nor does it take that much effort to phrase comments less offensively. All I ask is that posters don't use the other posters they don't like in the community as their proverbial punching bag for everything they hate about their own life.

Yes, there is a difference between a library and a bar but I still wouldn't treat people the others have chosen to on here in either setting. Wrong is wrong and deciding who to gang up on from inside a hole somewhere is insanely unfair to the lone poster who is often clueless. I just want to keep the field level.

Certain groups on this board have taken it upon themselves to ban together and run off individual members they do not like - maybe at one time they thought it was for good reason but I think its time to balance things out a little with some positive perspective.

There is a time and a place for everything but once bad behaviors become habitual its time to step back and reflect. There needs to be some backswing from all the negativity lately.

Everything in moderation. Just like a good Lutheran, this is my motto and how I will moderate the forum.

Hope that helps.
bojulay's Avatar
My question is.

Is there a way to separate discussion threads from ad threads, or
would you want to, just use the sticky option maybe.

Maybe have a specials sticky thread as well, where ladies could special post
any specials they are offering.

Also I think a video clip sticky thread would be cool where ladies could
post video clips of themselves if that is possible.

And maybe have it where ad and specials posts are deleted after a certain
time period to help eliminate clutter from old posts.

Also I would have it as an open forum and let everyone have access, but be more strict
on the civility, with the option to kick someone out for a time or permanently if they
prove they can't behave, maybe a three strikes your out for good or something
like that.

Just some ideas.
LazurusLong's Avatar
What sites? I would love to know more about them. Are they local? Do they have advertising too or just discussions? Originally Posted by thathottnurse
Back almost 10 years now, when some ASPD members had gotten their fill of much of the attacking and slamming, they created their own new site, AfterHourseCentral. AHC for short.

Before it cratered, and the reasons for that are many depending on is doing the telling, it had around 5K members. I don't recall how long it was a viable option to ASPD but there were plenty of providers who left ASPD altogether and only posted on AHC.
All good ones!

Thank you! Once the forum is up you will see the basic structure and can offer suggestions on content and structure. I'll be sure to send you an invite, boujolay.

I prefer organization over chaos and will keep ads seperate from member discussions via stickies.