Sugar Daddy

This topic has captured me yet again. So often posted and so often debated. Yet rarely, if ever, do I see the real answer.


All types of relationships are subjective and individual. Period.


In some circles, any woman who relies on any man for anything is a hooker. Did she require a dinner before putting out? Well of course she is a prostitute! sarcasm inserted here


There is no direct defining answer to what a sugar baby can be, is, or where she can be found. What defines a sugarbaby or sugar daddy are the two individuals involved. If a man pays a woman's electricity but does not live with her, he could be a boyfriend, a client, or a sugar daddy. He could be her family member, friend, or a best friend with benefits. He could simply be a generous stranger.


Just like any relationship one approaches the possibilities with their own personal view in mind. In the effort of objectivity this would mean every single opinion on this topic is completely correct. Oh how it pains me to say that. I cringe at some of the definitions. However as much as I may not like some of the opinions, they are all correct to their individual selves and situations. Trust me, some of the opinions cast a rise of bile in the back of my throat and sent a burning desire to roll my eyes rushing through me.


From my perspective and my past sugar daddies perspectives, I have been a sugar baby. Labels are meant to define something in an effort of communication.


For the men and women. When you decide to pursue something like this make sure you are aware of your own personal definition. After discovering what you believe it to be make sure this belief is exposed. This will attract those that have similar or same beliefs. You should not have to change your own belief systems or personal perspectives to accommodate another's. For every yin there is a yang and for every belief you will find more followers.


To the OP, attracting a sugardaddy no matter what his or your perspective usually comes down to a couple of basic requirements. Time, compatibility, matching belief systems. Make a website and define your views of being a sugar baby and what you seek in a sugar daddy. Make sure you detail the minimum of what you are interested in, as well as the maximum fantasy man. Describe yourself and what you have to give into the relationship. What are you willing to give up? How much time and availability do you have to designate for him? Can you last minute travel? What are your dreams and goals in life. Make yourself available. Finding a SD outside of the online world can have its challenges but has a higher likelihood of success. Frequent places that you enjoy but are high class or nicer. Expensive or nice malls, high end bars, golf courses, 5 star restaurants. As stated before, if you are a provider, treat every client with respect. Any one of them can turn out to be your next sugar daddy. Most men do not like to be treated like an atm anymore than most women like to be treated like a walking blow up doll.


Don t be discouraged. Sugar relationships are often harder than traditional relationships or cut and dry provider/client relationships. It can take time to accumulate the trust and interest between each other that is necessary.


Once again my two cents on the subject. Originally Posted by JayceeRivers

Gosh , you are sooo damn sexy!
Lucky LaRue's Avatar
I will not quote JayceeRivers but her reasoning is spot on. Being a SD or SB be is so much more than the label indicates. There is so much more behind the scenes. Emotions are much more involved. Having said that you walk in knowing the lifestyle of each other and that should be first and foremost. The second priority should be the concern for one another in situations that would require immediate attention (reasonable) . One may trump the other in certain situations without a doubt.
Nice thread !
Gotyour6's Avatar
And I have never yet met a hooker that can move from the money mentality to the sugar baby one.

Most hookers have the pretty woman syndrome and that is what they have to get away fro.

No knight in shining armor is going to sweep a girl off her feet.

It has been tried and won't work.

So keep getting paid by the hour and you will get what you are looking for.

Fairy tales are for children, grow up.
And I have never yet met a hooker that can move from the money mentality to the sugar baby one. Originally Posted by Gotyour6
Perhaps you have not looked at the correct people. For a man who seems to assume himself incredibly perceptive I would expect a more varying view. You do realize you come off as cynical and judgmental rather than knowledgeable and intelligent right? I thought you might like to know. From the gathered past posts of yours I have gleamed you prefer your partners to be either a) young and naïve, easily manipulated and/or malleable b) not exactly harboring a high IQ (this is opposed to young and easy though very well could be both)

This leads me to believe a woman who is self aware and intelligent can be intimidating to you and your opinions. I find it interesting that you have a young perfect sugar baby and a believe you have mentioned wife as well in the past and yet you are here on this "hooker board" with an abundant amount of reviews indicating something is not fulfilled in your life. More interestingly is your views seem to indicate that you view providers in a very negative fashion.



Most hookers have the pretty woman syndrome and that is what they have to get away from. Originally Posted by Gotyour6
I am so proud of you! Not a year ago you were quite stuck on the words "all" and "every" progress! Good for you. On the other side to this coin, no one dictates what your hopes and dreams should be do not dictate other's. If a woman or provider decides to have the fantasy of being saved by a handsome, wealthy man, it is her fantasy to be had, not yours. Though we do come back around to your presumed perceptiveness. What studies have you done to explore this belief? Do you have any facts to support this statement?


No knight in shining armor is going to sweep a girl off her feet.

It has been tried and won't work. Originally Posted by Gotyour6
Not for nothing but I do not imagine the happy couple would rush back to the "hooker board" to announce their upcoming life plans. Assuming they did live happily ever after I can not imagine them caring let alone remembering to update the world of providers and hobbyists of their contentment. Likely only those that failed would be vocal about their experiences. No one tells you what you should strive for (or if they do they should not) no one can tell you what to hope for or dream of. Your fantasies are your own to share or to have. That being said, if a provider has a fantasy of a white knight or Richard Gere it is her right and her choice to dream of this. Just as it is the right of the poor family to dream their lottery ticket will be THE winner, and the child in the back of the class to fantasize about going to the moon. The moment we stop dreaming is the moment we become miserable people. Perhaps that is the problem with some providers. They simply stopped dreaming they could reach their future.

Do not mistake me, my dream is NOT to find a knight or end up the mistress or wife of some wealthy man. I am not provoked into the fantasy of being saved. I do, however, have my own dreams and intend to reach them. Once I do I will set new. I will reach higher until the day I die. Only then will I stop setting fantasies for myself. For if we have nothing to dream there would never be a reason to try.



So keep getting paid by the hour and you will get what you are looking for.
Fairy tales are for children, grow up. Originally Posted by Gotyour6
It sounds to me like you were very injured at some point. Perhaps the tainted, tainted you in turn. For this I am incredibly sorry. I promise whomever did to you will likely get their turn. In the meanwhile remember those that speak the loudest fear they would not be heard otherwise. In other words you come off as very insecure my friend. Not that I imagine you care what us providers think of you. If you appear this insecure in an anonymous area known for openness and debauchery I can only imagine how insecure you come off in other area's of your life.

Now I am more than prepared for an aggressive return so I shall put on my flame retardant suit and back out of this conversation.
JohnnyYanks's Avatar
kaceyhazee's Avatar
I don't think a man should put himself in a SD position unless he is willing and able to take full care of another human being..thats what a Sd is supposed to be about...spoiling and pampering the girl of his interest..the ones that say escorts are "too focused on money" are usually the ones who only want an escort they don't want to see you do better for yourself they are just selfish and want to do the minimum for a lady as if she doesn't deserve it... I can't find a daddy for the life of me...every REAL man knows that when MAMA is happy EVERYBODY is happy
I wish I could find me real sugar daddy would take care of me and get out of business.Call me Sugar Daddies!
It is a lot easier finding them working in clubs than on the internet. You also get to meet them before you talk about any arrangement.
stimulatethemind's Avatar
Perhaps you have not looked at the correct people. For a man who seems to assume himself incredibly perceptive I would expect a more varying view. You do realize you come off as cynical and judgmental rather than knowledgeable and intelligent right? I thought you might like to know. From the gathered past posts of yours I have gleamed you prefer your partners to be either a) young and naïve, easily manipulated and/or malleable b) not exactly harboring a high IQ (this is opposed to young and easy though very well could be both)

This leads me to believe a woman who is self aware and intelligent can be intimidating to you and your opinions. I find it interesting that you have a young perfect sugar baby and a believe you have mentioned wife as well in the past and yet you are here on this "hooker board" with an abundant amount of reviews indicating something is not fulfilled in your life. More interestingly is your views seem to indicate that you view providers in a very negative fashion.



I am so proud of you! Not a year ago you were quite stuck on the words "all" and "every" progress! Good for you. On the other side to this coin, no one dictates what your hopes and dreams should be do not dictate other's. If a woman or provider decides to have the fantasy of being saved by a handsome, wealthy man, it is her fantasy to be had, not yours. Though we do come back around to your presumed perceptiveness. What studies have you done to explore this belief? Do you have any facts to support this statement?




Not for nothing but I do not imagine the happy couple would rush back to the "hooker board" to announce their upcoming life plans. Assuming they did live happily ever after I can not imagine them caring let alone remembering to update the world of providers and hobbyists of their contentment. Likely only those that failed would be vocal about their experiences. No one tells you what you should strive for (or if they do they should not) no one can tell you what to hope for or dream of. Your fantasies are your own to share or to have. That being said, if a provider has a fantasy of a white knight or Richard Gere it is her right and her choice to dream of this. Just as it is the right of the poor family to dream their lottery ticket will be THE winner, and the child in the back of the class to fantasize about going to the moon. The moment we stop dreaming is the moment we become miserable people. Perhaps that is the problem with some providers. They simply stopped dreaming they could reach their future.

Do not mistake me, my dream is NOT to find a knight or end up the mistress or wife of some wealthy man. I am not provoked into the fantasy of being saved. I do, however, have my own dreams and intend to reach them. Once I do I will set new. I will reach higher until the day I die. Only then will I stop setting fantasies for myself. For if we have nothing to dream there would never be a reason to try.





It sounds to me like you were very injured at some point. Perhaps the tainted, tainted you in turn. For this I am incredibly sorry. I promise whomever did to you will likely get their turn. In the meanwhile remember those that speak the loudest fear they would not be heard otherwise. In other words you come off as very insecure my friend. Not that I imagine you care what us providers think of you. If you appear this insecure in an anonymous area known for openness and debauchery I can only imagine how insecure you come off in other area's of your life.

Now I am more than prepared for an aggressive return so I shall put on my flame retardant suit and back out of this conversation. Originally Posted by JayceeRivers


And.......Ms. Rivers, for the win!!!
I think the sugar daddy thing works out only if the guy likes the girl ALOT. It is HIS choice since of course he's dishing out the cash. I don't think it works if two random people make an arrangement and agree on stuff lol
Whispers's Avatar
I don't think a man should put himself in a SD position unless he is willing and able to take full care of another human being..thats what a Sd is supposed to be about...spoiling and pampering the girl of his interest..the ones that say escorts are "too focused on money" are usually the ones who only want an escort they don't want to see you do better for yourself they are just selfish and want to do the minimum for a lady as if she doesn't deserve it... I can't find a daddy for the life of me...every REAL man knows that when MAMA is happy EVERYBODY is happy Originally Posted by kaceyhazee
Exactly what do you consider the "minimum" to be?

Your outlook is in the way of you finding someone. Being Spoiled and pampered is not what the best ones seem to be looking for. For many it's about stability, experiences and a bridge from one stage of their life to the next.

I've had the most recent baby for a year now. During her Freshman and Sophomore years she worked. She ran up mom and daddy's cards. She went into debt.

She has not worked in over a year and has zero worries. She ran up no additional debt last year and will not this year that simply graduating with a decent grade will not erase.

It's not remotely about keeping her happy. It's about her keeping me happy and I take care of the rest.

Is she spoiled? Pampered? I don't think so. She might say yes.

The difference lies in defining "wants" and "needs" and the best and lasting relationships are foung with women looking to fill their needs...

I've met a lot of providers over the years and not known many that can make that distinction. Their inability to understand needs vs wants keeps them turning tricks....
Whispers's Avatar
I think the sugar daddy thing works out only if the guy likes the girl ALOT. It is HIS choice since of course he's dishing out the cash. I don't think it works if two random people make an arrangement and agree on stuff lol Originally Posted by Novatx
It has to be mutual.... it's not at all like a provider client relationship where 2 people only need to connect for an hour.....

It can start exactly as you say. Two random people coming to an agreement on some "stuff"..... Where it goes and how it lasts is a function of how they connect in dealing with the stuff.
It's not remotely about keeping her happy. It's about her keeping me happy and I take care of the rest. Originally Posted by Whispers
He's right. I've was turned into one without me even realizing it in college. Although my tuition, rent, and phone were paid for by my parents I hated only having 300 a month for play money.

Ran into a relatively older man we hit it off and started seeing each other anytime he was in the area. Over time he started giving me more and more things. For example I'd mention wanting new bras, he'd buy me a few, the next month I was mailed a VS card that he wanted me to keep. Did I go hog wild buying the store? Nope. Did I thank him and made sure to model what I was able to get? Absolutely.

As long as I maintained a happy disposition around him then I didn't need to ask for things. He would just notice I needed a nicer dress for our dinner later or see me stare too long at something in the store. Then he'd either buy it for me or tell me to buy it with a credit card he gave me.

Anyways the moral of this story is BECAUSE the SB is happy around her SD he gives her things that she might need or want. Those things aren't to make her happy....she should be happy to be around him to begin with.

(Side note: I only recently admitted to myself that this was a SB/SD relationship. Thank you Eccie for making me realize I was in the hobby WAY before now.)
Gotyour6's Avatar
I wish I could find me real sugar daddy would take care of me and get out of business.Call me Sugar Daddies! Originally Posted by Fancylady
A sugar daddy isn't going to call you because you advertise on a hooker board.

Nor will they take care of you and get you out of "the business"

That is something YOU need to do.

Then as you struggle to make ends meet in some "regular" job and they see you trying to help yourself is when one will approach you. (A daddy worth anything anyway.)

There is no pretty woman white knight that is going to come and sweep you off your feet. No creditable sugar daddy is going to rush out there because you want to stop doing what your doing. We look for the ones that want to do what they are doing, work toward a goal and them help them obtain that goal.

Notice I didn't mention money? I didn't mention taking care of you. We help those that help themselves.

If you ever get the money mindset out of your head you may just find one.

The first question I ask a girl is what is your 3 year plan?

If they say college, travel a little if they can and get a good paying job or something like that then I listen. If they say they don't know and we talk a little more and she develops one right there because she hasn't thought about it then she is in.

You seem to be looking for a steady client so you don't have to support yourself and to "Get out of the business."