What are your hard lessons learned?

  • Sami
  • 11-16-2013, 06:51 AM
Do Not Save a providers number in your phone for SO to find..
pyramider's Avatar
Do Not Save a providers number in your phone for SO to find.. Originally Posted by Sami

You have done this?
  • Sami
  • 11-16-2013, 07:06 AM
LOL... No had a lady call me once because some fool put in his phone Sami - Hot
I had a very well known provider contact me via mail out of the blue recently asking why I had seen another provider and not seen her yet? Then she asked me again "why I would see that provider?" in the first place. I was surprised by that question as I think most of us know why we are here or choose see someone. It wasn't like I wouldn't have seen the inquiring provider, it just hadn't worked out timing wise nor had we set anything up (ever).

Based on the questioning, I could tell there must be something there (personal between them?) but I have no idea why. The provider I saw for the session never mentioned the other gal (or anyone else) and was pure IOP business.

Given that, I do see how there could be a lot of issues between providers either due to competitive issues or other personal drama so definitely agree on keeping your privacy a priority (even with each other in the business).
Kayleehotchick's Avatar
WOW! I can't believe she did that in the first place. Major warning sign she is a drama queen. Very unprofessional.
L.A.'s Avatar
  • L.A.
  • 11-16-2013, 08:29 AM
Not too many hard lessons learned fortunately but lots of things learned. There are too many to list but here are a few.

Trust your instincts. If something doesn't seem right then there's a good chance it isn't

If something negative happens like a ncns, or a bad session or even an upsell, then write the review, make your post, and then let it go. There is too much fun to be had in the hobby to hold on to the bad experiences.

And since this is lessons I'VE learned....A $300 session with somebody you haven't seen before has never been any better than a 150-200 session with an ATF.
Jules Jaguar's Avatar
My current advice for a hobbyist is don't talk about other providers during our session... Instant mood killer lol
greyengland's Avatar
Question...I see a lot of you mention using a hobby phone. I feel like for me, it would be infinitely harder to explain an extra phone if it was discovered, than a random text or something from a provider. I could just claim a wrong number in that instance. So what are the major reasons for using a hobby phone?
joshf26's Avatar
Question...I see a lot of you mention using a hobby phone. I feel like for me, it would be infinitely harder to explain an extra phone if it was discovered, than a random text or something from a provider. I could just claim a wrong number in that instance. So what are the major reasons for using a hobby phone? Originally Posted by greyengland
I learned the hard way why to have a hobby phone. My SO would play with my phone all the time. No worries. Than a provider I got to know very well saved my number (she did ask and I said yes), sent a pic of herself, topless and in a thong, with the message, "Cum and get it." And that's when life went to $hit. So now I have 2 phones. I keep it in my ride. That's just my experience. And about my SO, no we're no longer together and I told her that I wasn't sorry cause I was actually enjoying life. Plus a sexless relationship is never any fun. Plus she was a major prude, only vanilla sex, and I was always on top. Yep, I needed more flavors.
Jules Jaguar's Avatar
I had a very well known provider contact me via mail out of the blue recently asking why I had seen another provider and not seen her yet? Then she asked me again "why I would see that provider?" in the first place. I was surprised by that question as I think most of us know why we are here or choose see someone. It wasn't like I wouldn't have seen the inquiring provider, it just hadn't worked out timing wise nor had we set anything up (ever).

Based on the questioning, I could tell there must be something there (personal between them?) but I have no idea why. The provider I saw for the session never mentioned the other gal (or anyone else) and was pure IOP business.

Given that, I do see how there could be a lot of issues between providers either due to competitive issues or other personal drama so definitely agree on keeping your privacy a priority (even with each other in the business). Originally Posted by SD2011
A very well known provider (actually three) have done this to guys I've seen before, it's not at all uncommon.

I don't understand it but whatever lol
hobbyprojb's Avatar
My current advice for a hobbyist is don't talk about other providers during our session... Instant mood killer lol Originally Posted by Jules Jaguar
How would you find out if the Provider is into other girls??

You have to think long term in this biz...I'm always up for a threesome!

My Future Threesome Prospects..Vegas & Fetish Doll!
Come on people, how hard can we make it? The guys just want to have a fun visit with a fun lady. The ladies just want to have a safe fun visit and, if that all happens; Life is good and thats why we are here...But we all have to screen and research ...Afterall there are a lot of (IDKs and WTFs) on this board. We all have to be careful and have some fun! I hope
pyramider's Avatar
My current advice for a hobbyist is don't talk about other providers during our session... Instant mood killer lol Originally Posted by Jules Jaguar

What about if one is making positive taint comments?
Jules Jaguar's Avatar
How would you find out if the Provider is into other girls??

You have to think long term in this biz...I'm always up for a threesome!

My Future Threesome Prospects..Vegas & Fetish Doll!
Originally Posted by hobbyprojb
Sure 3somes are great, hearing alllllll about your ATF and her personal business during our alone time is not so great.

Ps those chicks are both hot
Sir Lancehernot's Avatar
What advice would you give newbie providers and hobbyist? Originally Posted by Kayleehotchick
For new providers, from a client's perspective:
  • You will gain far more, financially and personally, in the long run if you are an honest businesswoman. Don't misrepresent your appearance, prices, preferences, abilities, willingness, or the nature of your relationship.
  • Many of us have developed a bullshit detector. Flatter us, but don't patronize us. For example, tell me I'm a nice guy -- I might actually believe that -- instead of telling me I'm the best you've ever had
  • Learn how to mitigate your physical, financial, reputational, and legal risk.
  • Particularly if the hobby is not full-time for you, regular clients are one key to lowering your risk profile. When you've found a client whom you wouldn't mind seeing again, figure out what it takes to get him to return.
  • Understand that while sex may be primary motivator for just about every hobbyist, it's often not the only one.
  • Some guys are more reserved than others and need to be coaxed into dropping their façades.
  • There are many of us on both sides of the transaction who have been around for a while and would be more than happy to provide you with information and advice. Figure out who those people are and avail yourself of that knowledge.
  • Never underestimate the power of a sincere, "thank you," or "I had a nice time," or "when can you come see me again?" A lot of guys don't want to be bothered with e-mails or PMs (ixnay on texts and phone calls) between sessions, but, for those who don't mind, a little business-retention contact may very well decide who gets their next session.
  • When advertising yourself, be aware that the four biggest questions that clients have are:
    • What do you look like? (Don't lie, and if your photos hide your tattoos, tell us where and how big they are.)
    • What are your rates?
    • Where are you? (Or where can I see you?
    • How do I contact you?
You can write a whole lot more in your ad, but it will range from nice-to-know-but-I-don't-really-need-to-know to absolutely irrelevant. If an ad doesn't have the necessary information, you're losing clients, because it's just too easy to close it and move on to the next ad.
That's about all I can think of. Hope it helps.

Also, it's a good idea watch you say about other people in the hobby because it DOES get back to the person.
One thing I have learned over the years is never to underestimate the breadth of the provider network. While it's no surprise that guys exchange info via PMs and e-mails, ladies with no apparent connection sometimes do in fact know each other, and they frequently exchange information and gossip about clients.