Why do You Cheat?

I personally believe this is the reason men stray. I tried to find the study, but couldn’t. Several years ago I read that 80% of all the white males in Europe were genetically linked to 10 different genetic lines. Apparently only the males can be traced because of the X chromosome. That’s a lot of seed to spread.

Why do women cheat? Just like men, a variety of reasons, but I believe it centers around security or raw sexual desire. I have read that when a woman is thinking sexually she will choose a good looking man and consider his social / financial status very little. If she is considering a man for any other reason, his social and financial status is paramount and looks are far down the list. Originally Posted by OliviaHoward

The studies are out there somewhere... now about women. If you take it back to the past they cheated because they had to insure that their offspring would survive the harsh landscape. They wanted the biggest dude with the longest spear. Protection. Take that forward and this nesting instinct comes into the realm of who will provide a safe and secure habitat for my child to live and thrive in.
Now keep in mind modern society as we know it is relatively new in terms of the history of our species. If you throw in religious repression from zealot parents, abuse, influences, drugs, a dash of libidinal liberation, a touch of sexual recklessness from bi-polar disorder perhaps, and you have a completely new set of cheating rationalizations.

No idea, I have never cheated.

No idea, I have never cheated. Originally Posted by discreetgent

Not even on a jr high spelling test?

But what i do judge is men dating women for free and having them as secret lovers and make them pay all the emotional debth. Originally Posted by ninasastri

Why put all the judgement on the men? Shouldn't a woman that enters into a relationship with a married man be responsible of keeping own emotions in tack? After all she chose to participate in an adulterous relationship.

I wrote this (Link) before the whole Arnold thing came to light but it just goes to show you that most men will stray at some point in their life.

Why do you stray???? Has it only been in the hobby? Have you ever been caught?


http://alexthereluctantescort.com/20...d-be-marry-ed/ Originally Posted by Alex Lieberman

I think that people cheat when the sex isn't good enough.

And being a woman - when he can't pay the bills.

Thats crazy either you are lucky to have a woman like that or you ju suck in bed and she is getting it else where hahahahahahahahahahaha

I cheat with the full knowledge and acceptance of my mate.. she has lost her drive and doesn't have a problem with me still getting some .... So I guess you can say even my wife won't F#$%^ me ...lol Originally Posted by davidokc

Just for the strange. I have a SO that likes it as much as I do, so quantity is definitely not an issue.

Its not better its just different.

I wrote this (Link) before the whole Arnold thing came to light but it just goes to show you that most men will stray at some point in their life.

Why do you stray???? Has it only been in the hobby? Have you ever been caught?


http://alexthereluctantescort.com/20...d-be-marry-ed/ Originally Posted by Alex Lieberman

I don't buy the whole "it's the mans genetic predisposition to deflower every woman" thing. I do think that men and women in long term relationships take each other for granted in many ways, including sex. After awhile it becomes lack luster, and as a woman ages she begins to lose interest. This usually starts to after having had kids, and juggling household and job responsibilities. Most of the men I have met through the hobby generally love their wives very much, or the girl friend, but are lacking that sort of intimacy or passionate spark they once had when things were new. I really do believe men stray to stay in their relationships. I also believe there are a lot of single men who just either lack the desire to be rejected by a civilian woman (in the process of courtship and ultimately a sexual encounter) and no longer desire to "do the dance". Can't blame some of them at all for this. I feel some of these men have had a lot of hurt in their lives as well. For them it is easier to find the sex and intimacy in someone who they know will not emotionally hurt them. Then there are all the other reasons that come into play for why men seek out escorts / call girls. Too many for me to go on here with with. But, I don't hold any of this against any of them. I would like to think I have helped keep some men in their marriage, by giving them what they needed, and still being able to love and cherish the woman in their life. Maybe I am naive in this thinking..

I would like to think I have helped keep some men in their marriage, by giving them what they needed, and still being able to love and cherish the woman in their life. Maybe I am naive in this thinking.. Originally Posted by Guilty Pleasures

I would think that that is true. However, I doubt that any lady has decided to be an escort because she wanted to save marriages.

I would think that that is true. However, I doubt that any lady has decided to be an escort because she wanted to save marriages. Originally Posted by discreetgent

Why put all the judgement on the men? Shouldn't a woman that enters into a relationship with a married man be responsible of keeping own emotions in tack? After all she chose to participate in an adulterous relationship. Originally Posted by Ansley

yes that is true too, but HE is the adulterer not the one he dates, but i agree you are right. But given the fact HE is married he should be more responsible.

For example i am polyamorous, and once (and never again) dated a married man with the agreement we keep our relationships separate: He did not do that and dragged me into his marital bullshit. So? His marriage never was my business, he knew what he was doing, i did n`t, because he was my first married man plus i am acting my ethical boundaries , he does not. I do not condone this general attitude that married men seem to have that "once they are married their marriage is above everything else and its just logical that everyone has to accept that they just can`t behave normally". IF that is the case then they should not have lovers in the first place. I don`t condone that attitude of married men that everyone (including their wives) has to be submissive and second class to their marriage. And THIS is what i critzice and what happens.

I would never demand that only my relationship style demands the boundaries - and the sole boundaries - between 2 people. That is what escorts are there for. And that is what some married men think they deserve for free. Which is not true. If only one defines the rules then its not consensual and therefor its paid.

In my case married guy told his wife about me because he fancied the idea of polyamory (well, his wife did not) and what did i have from all this shit? Except being burned and degraded? Nothing. So it was HIS responsibility to keep me as a paid companion, since I could not see what kind of disrespect he really had. I am not monogamous, so i have no clue.

If some monogamous woman dates a married man and gets degraded, HER business. She deserves it. I don`t. I don`t make my polyamory anyones business , i never disrespected a marriage , nor did i ever want someone to divorce and i got treated as if i was the worst individual aver for actions HE did. So yes, i consider an adulterer more responsible, because they have the habit of hiding behind other peoples back and stabbing this back then when its convenient.

I simply don?`t understand why someone enters into a unpaid relationship with an escort and knows he can?t offer more just for the sake of his low self esteem. My ex did that again and again no matter what happened to me and his wife. And yes, i see him more responsible, becuase he is WAY older than i was at that time and his lovers are babies. Most of them. You can?t expect 20 somethings to be responsible for dating 50 year old married guys, really??
Plus after all this shit he did to me and his wife, he just did it all over again.

I didn`t. EVer ! I would never ever ever ever ever date a married man again. So yes, he is more responsible and every adulterer is,b ecause they KNOW the nature of their marriages. I don`t. And i don`t have to. I am not married therefore marriages are not my problem.

What i mean is people who are hypocrites and demand relationships whose boundaries they can?t handle.
I don`t do that and never did that, neither would i lie or cheat. ;-).

But i agree with you when it comes to Monogamous women being secret lovers of monogamous cheaters. They usually run around and sob about their exploits being married, and i have no pity whatsoever for them. At all.

I cheat with the full knowledge and acceptance of my mate.. she has lost her drive and doesn't have a problem with me still getting some .... So I guess you can say even my wife won't F#$%^ me ...lol Originally Posted by davidokc

then you are not a cheater but have a non-monogamous relationship agreement. that is not cheating. cheating implies lies and creative lies of ommission

I would think that that is true. However, I doubt that any lady has decided to be an escort because she wanted to save marriages. Originally Posted by discreetgent

that is true, but i did it because the usual norms of relationships did not appeal to me and i like the special intimacy of these encounters and want them in my private life as well (like that) and because of the money that comes wiht it, and the freedom.

But it is kind of logical that women get paid because the gents are married or can?t offer anything beyond a casual relationship.

My first motivation was when i was 18 that because i was pretty and such, many men wanted to have me in bed and have sex wiht me, but no one, or not so many REALLY wanted me and a relationship where i can rely on and whatnot. ANd i always was kind of a hippie with different attitudes for relationships, so i felt kind of exploited that no one wanted to share my relationship attitude (ok no one is an exxaggeration), but nevertheless all these mono-hypocrites wanted my sex.
I felt that everyone wanted "just sex" with me and at one point i got so angry about all of these approaches (it was men much older and married and even one of my schoolteachers - who btw was a notorious skirt chaser and whatnot) that i decided IF someone just wanted to have sex with no strings attached an me being SILENT about it,
he MUST pay for that so at least i also get something out of it. I was working as model at that time and i kind of noticed all that screwing around on many occassions and i was kind of upset with it and found if i get treated like a prostitute then i at least choose it right away as profession.
Its easier than to "do" all the photographers and "VIP" s to get some lousy paid jobs as model (IF you get them)

Then occasionally i got a different attitude. Being an escort is also something that develops over time.
I don`t t hink anyone chooses it to "save" marriages, but if you are aware of what you are doing , what a marriage means sociologically speaking and why escorts even exist, it comes naturally.
Wives and whores coexist in patriarchy.

I would think that that is true. However, I doubt that any lady has decided to be an escort because she wanted to save marriages. Originally Posted by discreetgent

Exactly.

No idea, I have never cheated. Originally Posted by discreetgent

Same here.