What's your funniest moment?

One of my favorite positions is doggie.In a session I was just slamming it into a provider. Musta went at it for 20 min straight. Had a great orgasm. Well apparently I was pumping the ole honey pot with air because after I pulled out she got up to go clean up. As she was walking away she was pussy farting with every step. We both started laughing and everytime she laughed she PF"ED some more. It was the most musical ending to a session I ever had. She had a built in boom box

I had a client start snoring IMMEDIATELY after his orgasm. I wasn't sure if I should be flattered, insulted, or concerned. I giggled, let him sleep a few and politely woke him up with a massage.

OMG lmaoI LOVE IT KEEP THEM CUMMING

One of my favorite positions is doggie.In a session I was just slamming it into a provider. Musta went at it for 20 min straight. Had a great orgasm. Well apparently I was pumping the ole honey pot with air because after I pulled out she got up to go clean up. As she was walking away she was pussy farting with every step. We both started laughing and everytime she laughed she PF"ED some more. It was the most musical ending to a session I ever had. She had a built in boom box Originally Posted by burkalini

Yess I have had that happen!!! I giggled too, thinking wow I sucked everything out of the feller

I had a client start snoring IMMEDIATELY after his orgasm. I wasn't sure if I should be flattered, insulted, or concerned. I giggled, let him sleep a few and politely woke him up with a massage. Originally Posted by heidilynnla

I had a gentleman show up right after a dentist appointment, his entire mouth still numb! DATY is a favorite, so after a few sloppy kisses, he went down town....He spent several minutes with hit and misses all over my kitty, and he was drooling like a baby! He was too numbed up to feel what he was doing! But, I love the ole' man! We still had a great time together!

Girl, I can't tell you how nice it would be to fall asleep during DATY. It's better than a massage, so I don't blame the guy! lol.

Flight arrived late into CC and I was running into a drugs store . . .lube I need lube! Saw the label KY, nice pack flavored arrangement, bought it, unloaded everything in my drawer. . . .

Client arrives and we are having quite some fun. . .I think time for lube grabbing in the drawer and ripping the top off with my teeth I squirt it all over his genitals and rub it all over mine and we continue . . .

Not even a minute later he's making wierd yelling noises, another minute late I am jumping up screaming and we run into the shower to wash it off . . .it turned out I had bought KY massage oil called "FIRE"!!!! . . . .oh it burned!! That was over a year ago and I still crack up about it!!

My frig was bare (was going on a trip in a couple of days) and all I had left was carrots. I ate a TON of them raw (I was starving).

Three hours later I had an appointment. While I was getting ready, I started to have cramps. I didn't think much of it and went on.

I show up at the date and within 10 minutes I was turning white and doubled over from cramps. This was right after he told me that he hasn't had luck with ladies in St. Louis. The poor guy took me home.

A couple of hours later I was fine and a bit embarrassed that I had to cancel due to too many carrots!!!

I had been seeing my ATF for almost 2 years almost every week. But we missed a couple of weeks for some reason and when we got together we could not keep our hands and mouths off each other.

I was at the Y just going at it strong since I had not had her in a while. She became very excited, little more than usual, and began shaking all over as her O began to build bigger and bigger. At the moment she reached the top she shook harder arching her back and wrapping my head in a headlock with her thighs. At the very moment of release a short little fart escaped. The next moment she and I were laughing so hard we both almost fell off the bed.

She blushed all over and started apologizing and asking for forgiveness. She said it had never happened in the all the time she had been providing. Then we calmed down enough to continue on and there were more O's for her and me as well.

We agreed to never bring up this subject again and we continue to enjoy visits regularly.

I have two pretty funny stories..

FIRST I was sharing an incall with another provider and my room was a wreck so I was using hers for an appointment. My client was sitting in a chair in the corner and I was giving him a very sexy lap dance... when suddenly the other girl's little black dog pushes the door open and runs in barking VERY LOUDLY. I tried to get the dog out but she hid from me! The other girl had to come and call her dog...so embarrassing!

SECOND I was at an outcall in Arlington with a really awesome client. He reminds me so much of one of my best friends so we always have a great time. Well he liked having the TV on in the background---it just happened to be playing Blades of Glory. Right in the middle of a very intimate moment, the little boy in the movie starts yelling "STRANGER DANGER!" and we both burst out laughing. It was hilarious but it ruined the mood

I had a client bring my favorite beverage to our appointment. I was turned to the TV, not paying attention and taking a sip of my drink and he touched the back of my leg with a cold beer bottle. I sprayed my drink all over the floor and started choking. I had to run to the bathroom, liquid was coming out of my nose and I couldn't catch my breath. He felt really bad. I think he did anyway. LOL. It was funny after I got my lungs back in working order.

I was getting a great BBBJ and was trying really hard to hold my load. She offered CIM so after a few minutes of holding I let go so hard that it came right out her nose. She took it like a champ though and kept going till I was done. Even walked to the bathroom with it dripping all over her titties.