Definition and a sensitive question

I personally don't mind a thicker man. I've had some of my fondest memories with bigger men. No disrespect to my big boys, but I just want you to do what I tell you when I tell you. Go wash your ass, and pick your belly up and put it on my back in doggy. Clean the penis and don't hide it from me, and we won't have any problems. I hope this doesn't come off as insensitive, but the key is just don't be a spoiled sport about your size. It only gets in the way if you let it. Originally Posted by Tiffani Jameson

Wow! Where do you find such classy "Tuxedos"

Yes, unless I have previously met the provider at a social or some other similar gathering. I do this for strictly selfish reasons because I want to have the very best session possible. If my 6'2" x 275# is out of a provider's comfort zone she needs to be aware and I don't think twice about it if she passes.

Obese isn't really up for debate. Its a percentage of body weight and it is what it is. 50lbs is obese if your 5'5, not if you're 6'5. well, 6'7. But its close...for the math, see here:

http://lowcarbdiets.about.com/librar...yfatcharts.htm

aside from the hard stats, which (lets be realistic - aside from professional athletes) there are few exceptions, its about preference and desire. Of course most women aren't dying to have sex with someone 50 and 100 lbs over healty weight. While facts are facts, there are of course components of a person - personality, kindness and intrigue that have an impact on superficial factors.

But I agree, someone who is significantly overweight (and you know if that's you, if you don't, your problems are about denial and weight is just a side effect), its probably for the best if you share it. If for no other reason other than it provides an opportunity for vulnerability. If you can't be accepted when you're vulnerable with her over email before you meet her, frankly, who wants the intimacy afforded in a 1 on 1 exchange?

Obese isn't really up for debate. Its a percentage of body weight and it is what it is. 50lbs is obese if your 5'5, not if you're 6'5. well, 6'7. But its close...for the math, see here:

http://lowcarbdiets.about.com/librar...yfatcharts.htm Originally Posted by Sydneyb

OK, the chart works for me...I fall into the overweight section, just barely.

But, I attended a school that required a certain amount of physical fitness and measured body fat every semester. It can be done a number of ways, most of which are fairly inaccurate. The only really accurate measure is the water displacement measurement...and few of us have that at our disposal.

Personality kindness and intrigue fly out of the window for me when someone needs a 15 minute recovery time just from walking from their car to my hotel room (and no, that's not a joke). That is NOT healthy. Of course, I cannot control the outcome of anyones health...nor can I see what is hidden..I realize I am already taking that risk. I am not willing to take the risk I can see though..I'd like to minimize the chances of me having calling the paramedics which is something I unfortunately have had to do once before. It's shit scary stuff.

I'd like to minimize the chances of me having calling the paramedics which is something I unfortunately have had to do once before. It's shit scary stuff. Originally Posted by Camille

At least you called them. Given the circumstances I can see some people heading for the hills.

What did you say? "My 'friend' and I were..............and......... .well he went into arrest..........."

Well fortunately he was still fully clothed. I just said I noticed he was struggling as he was passing my room and I grabbed him to steady him and ending up bringing him in. No-one questioned it..there had been a big conference in the hotel that day and one of the seminar rooms was on my floor so I guess they just thought he was one of that crowd. Not sure what the hell I would have said had he been naked? Sleep walker? To be fair the paramedics were more interested in his history of which I knew nothing.
A well known (now retired) provider in Boston once had a client have a heart attack on her and die..in his home. Turns out he was married too! H called the paramedics who figured out what the gig was but said they would not be telling his wife anytime soon..but they would have to tell the police incase "further inquiries into his death" were required. She was entirely innocent of course and his death was noted as a heart attack but that was a messy situation for sure!

I see your point Camille. Its different for everyone. When I was a provider, I had a seriously overweight client. Frankly, there gets to be a point when they really aren't expending too much energy by doing much more than laying back and enjoying themselves - its a utility issue, if nothing else...
Not to mention, when someone is seriously obese, actual intercourse isnt' an option.

With the very overweight client I had, I couldn't find his penis and I was PISSED he hadn't told me that he didn't have one! I was confused, trying to be polite, but had very little understanding that it was buried in his fat. I caught on (quick study here ;-) and was kind and satisfying to him, but didn't think I'd ever see him again.

During the pillow talk, I found that he had lived an amazingly exciting life and was FUN! Really neat past (backed up by verifyable facts). He was also the first person to ever get me that little blue box from Tiffany's. He was a sweet, sweet man. And a pain in the ass. But I liked him.

Unfortunately, I found out he died by getting a letter from his wife, who went through his hobby email (he saved our letters). She was an ex provider, and was MAD - She didn't handle it well, to be sure....so make sure you erase your letters boys...

But all said, its a personal choice; one you have every right to decide on for yourself, your comfort and your level of attraction required towards your dates...

Wow! Where do you find such classy "Tuxedos" Originally Posted by atlcomedy

I know, I can be quite honest and brash, especially PWI. Out of a couple glasses of Scotch...

Yes, unless I have previously met the provider at a social or some other similar gathering. I do this for strictly selfish reasons because I want to have the very best session possible. If my 6'2" x 275# is out of a provider's comfort zone she needs to be aware and I don't think twice about it if she passes. Originally Posted by Randy4Candy

To be so tall, that doesn't sound bad. It actually sounds quite nice. I had an ex with those specs and because of his body type, which was mostly muscular with a little 'love' on top, and that was perfect.

Of course there is the standard definition that Sydney spoke of, but there is also perception, and even that shouldn't be debated. I have been shocked at what most men feel about us ladies' bodies. Ladies thought of as 'average' to some can be 'skinny' or 'BBW' depending on perception. To be offended or not offended by someone's size it's all about your perception of size. In an instance like Camille went through, it can be scary especially since his health was in question, but you have to know how to make both of you comfortable.

middle seat between two fat people....their excess hides me and i have to part their intrusions to even reach my tray table

middle seat between two fat people....their excess hides me and i have to part their intrusions to even reach my tray table Originally Posted by nevergaveitathought

Completely tasteless. This sure has been an interesting thread.

I see your point Camille. Its different for everyone. When I was a provider, I had a seriously overweight client. Frankly, there gets to be a point when they really aren't expending too much energy by doing much more than laying back and enjoying themselves - its a utility issue, if nothing else...
Not to mention, when someone is seriously obese, actual intercourse isnt' an option.

With the very overweight client I had, I couldn't find his penis and I was PISSED he hadn't told me that he didn't have one! I was confused, trying to be polite, but had very little understanding that it was buried in his fat. I caught on (quick study here ;-) and was kind and satisfying to him, but didn't think I'd ever see him again.

During the pillow talk, I found that he had lived an amazingly exciting life and was FUN! Really neat past (backed up by verifyable facts). He was also the first person to ever get me that little blue box from Tiffany's. He was a sweet, sweet man. And a pain in the ass. But I liked him.

Unfortunately, I found out he died by getting a letter from his wife, who went through his hobby email (he saved our letters). She was an ex provider, and was MAD - She didn't handle it well, to be sure....so make sure you erase your letters boys...

But all said, its a personal choice; one you have every right to decide on for yourself, your comfort and your level of attraction required towards your dates... Originally Posted by Sydneyb

Great post, Sydney. It exactly parrots the way that I feel about the topic.

Hugs,
Elisabeth

Completely tasteless. This sure has been an interesting thread. Originally Posted by ElisabethWhispers

it might be tasteless but it wasnt odorless

Completely tasteless. Originally Posted by ElisabethWhispers

if it wasn't tasteless, none of us would be here.

What would you consider obese? 50lbs over weight? More? less?
Also, gents, when contacting a provider would you disclose that you are obese if you were or would you say nothing if there is no note on her website to do so? Ladies, do gents usually let you know in advance? Obviously I am asking this for a reason but I'm curious to hear the thoughts of others.

Thank you

Camille xx Originally Posted by Camille

You know what? This is a pretty useless thread. It doesn't matter whether or not you are obese, or overweight. What matters is the provider's attitude and restrictions.

If you don't want to see overweight/obese guys, say so clearly. Turn them away at the door if they show up after knowing your restrictions.

Providers always trot out their ability to set their rates, conditions, etc. I don't see why this is any different. Just say so up front. And if a hobbyist appears at your door that is outside your restrictions in this regard, slam the door in his face.