When a female answers the phone...and other ways to mess up a perfectly good Saturday session...smh

No, she didn't sound particularly young or old...so I dunno.

He should have brought some cake and cookies from his mom's house.

This is not an alert, but a retelling of something that happened to me and a doubles partner today.

Backstory: I was emailed by a client of mine. In the past we had enjoyed a multi-hour outcall to his place. We had excellent rapport and a genuinely memorable time. He asked for 2 hour double with me and another lady I have worked with on occasion. In his e-mail, he listed two ways to communicate with him that were safe: email and phone (voice and text). He openly invited me to call him to confirm. Also, the last time I talked with him he told me that he was completely single (details about that seems legit).

We set up a two hour session today at 5pm at my incall. I talked to him twice on the phone this week, and we exchanged several texts; all was fine and dandy. Last night I talked to him and asked him to confirm with me by 3pm for our 5pm meeting. I would need that amount of time to get to my place and get set up. I would give him the address as well since I knew his commute would be pretty long.

3pm today...no texts or calls to confirm with me. 3:14, I text as ask "We still on?" No response. I need to leave by 3:30 to get to my incall and get set up for our session at 5. I call him at 3:20. It goes to voicemail. I send him a text at 3:21 and 3:23. At this point, I am let my doubles partner know I have not heard back from him. She needs at least an hour to drive to my place. I call again at 3:27 leave a message: "Hi ****, this is Marie. Are we still on? Me and my friend need to know because we need enough time to get to my place. Thanks."

At 3:33 I call once more. This time a female answers the phone. Yikes! I come up with another male name and ask, "Is **** available?" She responds, "There is no **** here. You have the wrong number." My response: "so sorry, thank you, goodbye."

I text my doubles partner and let her know what happened. We are thinking "holy crap, he musta gotten busted." We assume the appointment is a no-go. Poor guy. I had full permission from him to contact him as he had no females to worry about...hmmm

At 3:48 I receive a call from his number but fearful of who might be on the other end, I let the call go to voice mail. I check the voice mail and it is his voice, nonchalantly saying, "Hi Marie, sorry I missed your call. Call me back." I am thinking, "no way, I don't want to be in the middle of this guy's girl trouble."

At 3:52, he calls back, and I hesitantly answer the phone. He again sounds very non-chalant and apologizes for missing my call. I tell him that I hadn't heard from him and was calling him to confirm. I told him that a female answered his phone. He said, "What?" I repeated. He then says "Oh, I was visiting my mother. I must have been in the bathroom or something..." I politely tell him that I am no longer comfortable with going through with the session. I also remind him that he was supposed to contact me at 3pm so that I could leave on time, etc. He sounds disappointed and can't understand why I would want to cancel, reassuring me that he is single and there was nothing to worry about: "C'mon, Marie, it's me, we've met each other. You know me..." I explain that it is not normal for a female to answer the phone around the time when you should be getting ready for or confirming a session and that it made both me and my double's partner nervous. I was still a little startled that I had spoken to a female, but started to calm down a bit. Part of me said, "Yes, you know this guy (even if we only met one time for 2 hours). He's probably telling the truth, but what if??? And what if I bring problems for my double's partner as well by being too trustful?" I decide to give him the benefit of the doubt and tell him that I need to call my partner and ask her opinion and that I would call back shortly.

I call my partner, and we agree to go through with it, starting at 5:30pm instead. I call him back, and we agree all is good and we will meet at 5:30, and I would text him the address shortly.

I get all my stuff together to leave to my incall, but while I do so, I receive another text message from him saying, "forget it, now I am not comfortable." I respond, "okay." I mean what else could I do???

Did I do something wrong here? Is there anyone to blame? Naturally me and my partner are upset about how everything turned out.

1. He should have confirmed at the time I gave him.
2. He should not have let a woman answer his phone.

Now, my partner and I are out several hours of our time, without compensation, and he isn't getting any. Or maybe he decided to spend it somewhere else...

Thoughts anyone? Originally Posted by YummyMarie

I would had felt strange but i probably would had still went through with it. He was probably telling the truth, but if he were married i would just chalk it up to the fact that we see married guys all the time. But gut instincts should always be first!

I would had felt strange but i probably would had still went through with it. He was probably telling the truth, but if he were married i would just chalk it up to the fact that we see married guys all the time. But gut instincts should always be first! Originally Posted by bustyamy

But in the end, HE was the one that turned down the appointment.

But in the end, HE was the one that turned down the appointment. Originally Posted by YummyMarie

Yes, and I'm sure when his ducks are in a row he will call back!

Your rules are for your safety and security and are certainly not burdensome. He didn't follow them and caused this whole clusterfuck. You seemed to have gone the extra mile to make this happen, kudos to you, and sorry it didn't work out.
Now IG has the sads for Yummy.

In this hobby, these last minute changes usually don't end up very well.

In the future, perhaps, you could say that if the hobbyist doesn't confirm by said time, it's a firm no-go.

Then, this situation would have ended right here:

....Last night I talked to him and asked him to confirm with me by 3pm for our 5pm meeting. I would need that amount of time to get to my place and get set up. I would give him the address as well since I knew his commute would be pretty long.

3pm today...no texts or calls to confirm with me. Originally Posted by YummyMarie

That's it.....no worries.

I don't quite get the apprehension regarding the woman, so what if he lied about being married or having an SO?

The salient point here though is he didn't confirm in adequate time as agreed upon. Everyone's time is valuable, both the provider's and the clients'. I'm not a fan of people wasting my time, and I'm cognizant about avoiding wasting theirs.

On the other hand, you gave him a pass for that but apparently made him feel weird about the woman thing, so he backed out in the end. Who knows if that's really why or not. :shrug:

He's a retard.

Sounds like his Mom I think he was grounded. Sometime the best laid plans just don't work out. Probably fucked up everyone involved that day.

He should have brought some cake and cookies from his mom's house. Originally Posted by pyramider

No Doughnuts Though lol jk

You did the right thing. He didn't confirm and verify timely. The mere fact after the fact of you reconsidering seeing him.......he accepted and instead of being grateful that you made an exception in protocol for you.....he then thanks you by cancelling again via text. Seems moreso he did that out of spite, not because he had hurt feelings about you assuming he was lying possibly about being single. If I'm gonna cancel on a lady especially in a circumstance that's all of my fault, its usually better to do by phone so she can convey tone. For all you know.......his "girlfriend" might have been trying to get you to text the address so she could get at you. Like on some "if you want to stay in a relationship with me I gotta see this chick type stuff."

Sounds like his Mom I think he was grounded. Sometime the best laid plans just don't work out. Probably fucked up everyone involved that day. Originally Posted by MrClark

People don't realize sometimes we cancel another appointment because we are booked. I'm sure she lost out that day. Always confirm or unconfirm out of mutual respect of each others time. Especially when she had a second provider's time tied up as well!!!

But what if the chick is vengeful? What if she tries to cause problems for ME? Originally Posted by YummyMarie

Just a risk in the hobby one takes. You can get it from vengeful wives or jealous lower tier whores. But it can always happen in the hobby...

Having been in the position where 2 different gentlemen friends of mine got caught in the last year because they were careless in their communications (left an email/text open or didn't protect their computer/phone with passwords), I can tell you that you did nothing wrong, Marie. I applaud you for being thoughtful about protecting your client's privacy. You reacted exactly right when the female voice answered.

We ladies can caution our married fellows to be careful, even tell then what measures to take to keep their secrets safe, but in the end is is up to each gentleman to be diligent and attentive to the risks AND the rules. Few wives are going to take their anger out on providers (they will "unleash Hell" on the SO, however), but they may try to call "suspicious" numbers that keep popping up in a cell's history. (Guys, delete, delete, delete!) Caller ID and voicemail are wonderful things, and my incoming message makes me sound like an entertainment planner. (Which is certainly true. ) Most likely nothing negative related to a provider would come of a married regular who gets caught other than the lady getting a message saying that he can't see her any more and to cut off all contact. (The ultimate outcome in both of my cases.)

I can't see why anyone would lie to a companion about being married, but I also can't see why his MOTHER would pick up his ringing cell. That's something usually a girlfriend or wife does. I probably would have told him to come on ahead, too, since I was at my incall and had already made arrangements. However, the fact that he suddenly felt "uncomfortable" sounds odd, and since he didn't follow the rules plainly laid out well ahead of time, I'd say he owes you a cancellation fee, but good luck collecting.

I think there was more going on with him that you'll never know.