The body language of a date

To the original question, which I know was directed to the gents and not me, I usually let the man lead the way in terms of body language and what he's comfortable with. Originally Posted by Natalie

So tell me, how would you handle meeting a distinguished looking man in a bar at a fancy hotel?

Very true! I wonder if it was a totally different situation between them.

Maybe levels of competition/hostility are the same among genders but women are more sensitive to it? Originally Posted by Natalie

I think boys are trained early to not take insults so seriously. We are still Neanderthals

I think boys are trained early to not take insults so seriously. We are still Neanderthals Originally Posted by WTF

Maybe because the cost of escalation is higher.

Most often, when I have seen things escalate between women, they haven't resorted to dueling pistols to defend their honor.

Meanwhile, I don't buy this stuff about men having ruled the world ... ever. Or women, for that matter. Last time I checked we are members of the same species so anything that hurts one will ultimately hurt both.

Nature only judges by one standard: do your genes get passed? That's it. It doesn't love humans any more (or less) than it loves bacteria.

If philosophies such as feminism result in beautiful, intelligent and educated women having greater numbers of viable offspring; then nature judges that a winner. If it results in increasing numbers of such women removing themselves from the gene pool either explicitly or by default of the choices they make, then it is a loser. I'm not judging -- I'll let nature judge.

On a similar note, sometimes the behaviors, tendencies and preferences resulting from our evolutionary psychology that were adaptive at the time for which they were selected become maladaptive in new environments. One easy way to measure this is by sub-replacement-level reproduction among folks who manifest those behaviors, tendencies and preferences.

If my tendency to break out Mr. Neanderthal gets me women and offspring, it is a good thing. If it gets me thrown in jail so I can have no offspring, it is a bad thing. At least from the standpoint of the way nature judges.

So tell me, how would you handle meeting a distinguished looking man in a bar at a fancy hotel? Originally Posted by pjorourke

Hmm, that's never happened to me.

I think you're right. Though there is no shortage of women who love themselves, but there is a significant group of women who are quick to hate. A few nights ago I had a goth day yet again - you witnessed the outfit once. I went to an Italian place with my date and some women were admiring, some were curious, a great deal hardly looked at me - but some looked like they wanted to beat me with their stilettos. I don't understand the anger. Excuse me for having fun and doing exactly as I want to.

I can only go by my own experience and certainly being very busty probably exascerbates the issue; I catch a lot of glares! I do agree with Natalie that in a strip club, a place one would think would be highly competetive, the women support each other. It's refreshing. I remember going to a holiday party with my girl friend after I had retired from stripping and missing that level of commraderie and compassion.
Lauren, you are always going to stand out because you're having the most fun in the room! Where you wearing your red hat?

When I'm out with someone else, I rarely notice anything else going on around me. Frequently, I have had dinner or drinks with a gentleman and not until we are leaving said, "When did everyone else arrive/leave?" I just don't notice.

I recently had two great nights out with 2 ladies who post on here; Chiara and Sydney. Both evenings included a trip to 2 rather busy but very enjoyable spots. Being with a woman didn't make me any more likely to pay attention to what was or was not going on around me (oh...other than the appearance of a really cute dog lol).

When I'm on my own that different. A few of years ago, my mum (who is also tall) told me to smile more when I catch peoples eye. To honest, I hadn't really noticed that I wasn't doing that..but clearly she had and I asked her why. My mum (who is also tall) said it takes the intimidation away from your height. I thought she was kidding...but nonetheless gave it a whirl. Regardless of how someone was looking at me, if I caught their eye I smiled and it makes a MASSIVE difference. I'm 5'11 in bare feet and wear heels a lot. Syd and Chiara are also tall...but we are all friendly when we go to places full of unknowns and I think (for whatever reason) when you are a tall woman that's even more important. I would think if you are intimidating because of the way you dress or because you are a stunning beauty the same would apply. All those things sort of command attention...but a smile says you are not aloof, standoffish and therefore demanding attention which is something totally diferent. A smile really can make all the difference. If it doesn't, you tried, move on and let it go...

C x

While at said romantic dinner, I saw another couple enter, with an obvious age difference. I spotted her as a pro immediately. He was likely in his sixties and didn't seem young in spirit or care much for his appearance - not to say he was unattractive or didn't care, but certainly didn't strike me as the "young at heart" sort of guy or the devilish charmer that would easily attract younger women. She was dressed in a very alluring outfit, and her eyes were dead even when she smiled. Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill

So, you say have met Nineveh in real life? :-)

To be honest I have not been a witness so I don't know. But an attractive women with a disinterest in her eyes, or even arrogance in her mind is honestly not bad. Actually I'm a sucker for such women.

I recently met a potential (okay she will be) sugar baby. She is 31 and african-american, I am lower fifties, caucasian. But the electricity between us for that meeting (very public spot where a fellow worker stopped by) was wonderful. When we went our separate ways we were in a very private spot where we stole kisses from each other. When I lightly kissed her neck she breathed in a gasp of a lover being seduced and the hint of future pleasure. I think if we were at a restaurant/bar, you (Lauren) would think/say what that bartender said to you.

When I'm out with someone else, I rarely notice anything else going on around me. Originally Posted by Camille

I think you hit on a important aspect there Camille.

So, you say have met Nineveh in real life? :-)
Originally Posted by ..

Yea sounds like she ran into Niv and PJ out on the town!

On a similar note, sometimes the behaviors, tendencies and preferences resulting from our evolutionary psychology that were adaptive at the time for which they were selected become maladaptive in new environments. One easy way to measure this is by sub-replacement-level reproduction among folks who manifest those behaviors, tendencies and preferences.

. Originally Posted by Laurentius

That might not be the best way to judge....educated folks/society tend to have fewer kids not more. So does it always go back to the beggining?Neanderthals!

Yea sounds like she ran into Niv and PJ out on the town! Originally Posted by WTF

Lauren, your story reminds me of something that happened to me a month or so back. I had a overnight date in Atlanta and my date and I went to one of my favorite restaurants. After a great meal we walked outside and we were waiting for the valet. As we were waiting we both got a little quiet, we were observing a couple waiting for their car. Something was off, not quite sure what is was. He was definitely a few years her senior.He moved in close, at first she responded, but later you could see she physically distanced herself iin some small subtle way. Both my date and I just stood there observing them. They were 8 ft in front of us and had no idea we were watching them. A couple of guys were about 5 ft to our right and they were observing them as well. My date and I smiled at each other ,thinking hmmm, I wonder. Well you could have knocked me over with a feather when one of the guys to my right approached my date and I and gestured to the couple and said" What do you think, a pay-for date".........if only he had known that was exactly our circumstances. But I guess our body language did not show it. And actually after a little thought I don't think she was a P4P date, I think she was just a younger woman going out with a well established older gent that she was not physically attracted to.

when one of the guys to my right approached my date and I and gestured to the couple and said" What do you think, a pay-for date''. Originally Posted by tylorblake

What if he had you two pegged and was asking for an expert opinion!

Anytime we see a couple outta wack , where the lady is younger and prettier than their date, we think one of two things: big wallet, big weenie.

Anytime we see a couple outta wack , where the lady is younger and prettier than their date, we think one of two things: big wallet, big weenie. Originally Posted by WTF

weenie size seldom has anything to do with it

weenie size seldom has anything to do with it Originally Posted by nevergaveitathought

Well then WTF has some hope. The wallet thing had struck him out.