No show - Uniquemonique made me angry

I know I will regret this, but just to set the record straight. I did have several confirmations from Monique about this being a firm appointment. We exchanged a half dozen e-mails discussing the appointment. The evening before the appointment she sent me a text with her address, the details on what to do when I arrived, and instructions to just text her when I got to the gate and she would give me the code.

I have been hobbying two to three times a week for the last three years. This was not my first rodeo. I had a confirmed appointment. The e-mail I sent two hours prior to the appointment time was just one saying i couldn't wait to see her. She did not reply. Based on the nice exchanges the couple of days before, I was surprised, but it did not raise any red flag that the appointment was no longer on.
Then one hour before I sent a text saying I was on my way. No reply, but I figured she may be getting ready, or any number of reasons for no reply. Neither of these two messages required a reply, I was just surprised I did not get one.

So I did not head to an appointment without knowing if it was confirmed or not. I had the confirmation, the address, the details of what to do when I got there.

So, please, no more lectures on how to handle an appointment. Of the hundreds of appointments I have had, this is only the second no show. Both were because the provider was still sleeping from partying too hard before my planned date. I do my homework before I set a date. I know how to set a date and how to confirm that date.

This was just a plain and simple no show on the part of the provider.

She did apologize. She felt really bad about missing the appointment. She told me she had never done that before, etc. So, trust me, this was a confirmed appointment and a legitimate no show.

Don't bother getting upset man, the longer you stick around the more you'll understand that it's usually the same WK trolls giving you shit for whatever you post. It's just in their DNA. Just learn to ignore them and keep it moving. No sense in entertaining it any further than their original post. There's plenty of advantages here on ECCIE, it's one of the best sites there is for what we do. You just have to familiarize yourself with the environment a bit more and learn to optimize the benefits. Hobby on my friend! Originally Posted by DarkeyKong

Thanks, DK. Sound advice. I did one more post just to make sure everyone understood that this was a confirmed appointment and I did not just drive to this lady's apartment hoping she would see me. :-)
But that is the end of my participation in this thread and any other.
I will, for sure, keep on partying. I will just keep my comments and opinions to myself. Thanks

I usually hobby early weekend mornings and there have been many many times I've gone ahead and headed out that way with no response the morning of the confirmed appointment.
I live far from everything so my drives are usually 45 minutes at a minimum. I'm the eternal optimist and figure if I get out that way and still no response then I'll try to either find something else to do...or someone else to do.
I will say anytime I've done this and not received a response was because they overslept. Most of these ladies are young and spend their Friday or Saturday nights out having fun so I go into it with a small expectation they will oversleep. Of course oversleeping at 1:15 PM is another story.

Thanks for posting this. Any information that can help others make a decision where to spend their time and money is helpful.

A good sign from Monique would be some kind of response, excuse, explanation, or apology.
It would be a good PR move to see her handle this the right way.

Monique did send me a couple text messages and an e-mail yesterday apologizing for her actions. As she said in one of her e-mails, there is no excuse, only the explanation that she got a call for an overnight and she just partied too hard and didn't wake up till 1:15pm. I received another e-mail this morning. So I have no doubt she is genuinely embarrassed that this happened. She said she would make it up to me if I would try again. I told her I appreciated her apology and I was no longer mad about this incident (to Kendall's point, when my plan A fell through I did resort to another letter in the alphabet and things worked out ok for me), but I told Monique we both had a lot of other choices out there so we should both move on. She replied that she understood and she wished me a happy Memorial Day.

So she and I are ok. Use this information in any way that may help you in your future planning.

We are glad you feel vindicated ... but you still do not understand what we were saying.

In defense of Gbfsl, I would have struggled with the decision to abort or continue.

He had the address, things had been confirmed 24 hours before, so in my mind I would have worried about not showing up, and then getting flamed by the provider as a nc/ns gent.

Most likely I would have driven over, assuming (as he said) the intended lady was otherwise occupied getting ready. Of course once i got there, the reality of a missed appointment would have set in.

It was almost a damned if he did/damned if he didn't situation. One indisputable credo in the hobby...shit happens.

Here's my take on this . . .

In defense of Gbfsl and to UniqueMonique,

As a provider, I would never EVER give the hobbyist I just NCNS'd the excuse that I just woke up from an drunken all-nighter. I mean, the embers were already sparking when you didn't get back with him, but telling a man that you just got out of an overnight is like adding fuel to the fire!

Heck - I don't think any hobbyist who has intentions of seeing you wants to know that you've been fucking another man all night (and maybe all morning). Now, unless he is a cuckhold, telling that tidbit of information certainly doesn't do anything for the male ego. Also, was it even Gbfsl's business to know what you were the doing the night before? Most likely not.

Nonetheless,

In defense of UniqueMonique - I can't really through stones on this because I've had the same thing happen to me once. Heck, maybe twice. LA knows exactly what I'm talking about. I am a big fan of Crown, Bacardi, Patron, and friends.

Nevertheless, I've learned the hard way to clean up my act, improve my TCB skills, and limit my drinking to Monday's or Tuesday's. I rarely ever go out on the weekend to drink or party with girlfriends anymore, because I know a gentleman will call me on Saturday or Sunday morning. It never fails.

But nonetheless, stuff happens. We live and we learn.

Gbsfl, keep in mind, when some reply to a post such as yours, the replies are not always aimed at you as much as trying to use your experience as a lesson for others to avoid the frustration you went through. Its not always personal

I have had 'set' appointments and no show , I don't ever try that person again

I know I will regret this, but just to set the record straight. ... Originally Posted by Gbfsl

gbfl, thx for providing more background.
it would have been helpful to have all this in the first post.
but, hey, we're human.

like OldButStillGoing posted, one of the history books - for your education as well as other hobbyists.


i most def agree w/ Adrienne Baptiste - if i heard that a provider i scheduled with and who no-showed me had been out partying hardy the night before DOES NOT setup for an erotic, stimulating, deliteful appt. just say "i'm so sorry that i didnt make it today. what can i do to make this up to you?"

it goes w/ what i learned long ago - just give your answer, no details. it can either make things worse or give the other person an opportunity to debate or minimize your reasoning.

The OP is suffering from the delusion that an appointment is an agreement to meet at a certain time.......but must realize that is true only in the real world.
In the world of hooker logic that is not the case. Because of similar experience I no longer head to an incall without a confirmation, especially if I need to drive more than 10 miles to get there. If I send a text or call and I don't get an answer with in a reasonable amount of time........MOVE ON to plan B.
You will be less upset and frustrated and angry.....set your priorities and rules and stick with them.