It is exactly a clique of participants who value safety. Unless I have missed my guess, that is a very good thing.
Originally Posted by scorpio31
i'm not sure about missing a guess - what ever that means, but you did miss the point. and an opportunity to add value in a response.
clique : klēk,klik (noun)
"a small group of people, with shared interests or other features in common, who spend time together and do not readily allow others to join them."
there's a common theme with newbies in that they're not clear how to get started. and it seems like there's no way in. yes, the question comes up from a newbie every eight days or so but it still deserves to be answered.
lifeshandy, as several have said already, there are several lovely ladies who, with some validation, would be happy to see you. do a search in this category for "newbie friendly" and you'll find a number of valuable conversations that include lists of providers who are newbie friendly.
in short, be nice, see nice providers, be generous, and you'll work your way into the clique.