you can stay two nights and a day or so in Galveston if you are interested. there are tricks in the area but you should line them up in advance or you'll be counting seagulls.....solo.
ps....i was there last week for lunch and it was hot as hell and not many tourist. If you want quieter and shorter lines, pick a weekday.
Or yeah.....most summer tourists in Galveston are old fat poor folk with their screaming grandkids.

Sometimes . . . your sardonic ass unwittingly comes off pretty hilarious.