Oxymorons

I think some of you don't *quite* understand what an oxymoron is...

Government worker

Congressional Ethics
Truth in Advertising
TV News

Pretty ugly

One Man Band

Soft Rock

and of course......Bad Pussy !

Hear Hear!

Crash landing..... invisible ink ..... escaped prisoner ..... journalistic integrity ..... original copy ..... paid volunteer ..... cherry tomato ..... toll free ..... maxi-thins ..... Hell's Angels ..... slumber party ..... affordable housing ..... postal service ..... turkey ham ..... dotted line ..... exact estimate ..... icy hot ..... freezer burn ..... actual reenactment ..... dry ice ..... liquid paper ..... Major General ..... twelve ounce pound cake ..... graduate student ..... honest lawyer ..... rapid transit ..... same difference ..... government organization ..... Quiet Riot ..... evaporated milk ..... extended deadline ..... barely dressed ..... ill health ..... (and my favorite) -- Hyundai Excel .....

Virtual reality

Honest politican

I got a speeding ticket in my speed boat .

The DNR officer stopped me at the lake where there was no horsepower restriction are a speed limit and told me that i was speeding in my speed boat .

The boat a Sanger 18 ft jet boat that weighed 2100 pounds had a 468 CID big block chevy with 550 HP with another 250 HP NOX kit on it a berkley out drive with a jetovator .

I had made a run a 5am when nobody was on the lake are around at all.

A asshole a sleep in the cove in his bass boat informed the DNR officer that i swamped his boat

Thus a speeding ticket in a speed boat .

Guess what ?

The boat was registered to the judge of the district we were in whom owned it before whom i know rather well . He didnt care it was still in his name .

so the day came to go to court and what do you think came about about me speeding in the JUDGES speed boat ?

I forgot to mention my favorite,

Drive on the Parkway and park on the drive way ,
Yep
Park on the drive way ,

"Driveway" literally means the "way to get to where you can drive". The "parkway" is a "way to get out of the city to where the parks are". Both terms make perfect sense. Neither one is an oxymoron.

Department of motor vehicles ,

Motors are electric ,

Internal combustion ENGINE

majority of cars on the road that are internal combustion engines vs electric

Needs to be the dept of engines

Roaringfork: "What do you charge (for a lap dance)?"

Stripper: "It's a twenty dollar tip."

Smart Drugs !