How much does texting affect the experience?

VictoriaLyn's Avatar
Its very hard to judge someone based off texts sometimes...My in-person personality is way different then when texting and even posting sometimes.

One on one I tend to be way more fun in conversation and I can be short and to the point when texting no matter how well/long I have known them.

I am definitely going to start working on that as I don't want to be seen as a distant person
And this might be the case with her and other providers. Some people just might not like texting. At least you realize that for the sake of getting new clients or keeping existing ones, that maybe communicating better is worth putting effort into. I dropped the only tattoo artist that I had ever gotten work from because his communication started to really suck. More like lack of communication. I think good communication should apply everywhere.
Britttany_love's Avatar
Wow you obviously didn't even read anything that I wrote. I had already seen this girl twice in the same week. I'm not some rando wasting time. Besides you're obviously still not understanding the jist of what I'm asking and that is if guys decide not to book due to the vibe given off during texts. I know some guys don't care if a girl is hot and will even tolerate horrible TCB. I for one don't want to see anyone if they're full of attitude for example regardless of looks. Originally Posted by Foodie1
First no need to be angry. My response was nothing negative or rude. Not to mention the ladies underneath me said some of the same things as did I yet you only singled me out.

I did read everything you said and it was quite vague. You seem upset that she either wasnt flirtatious enough or she was short? You really didn't elaborate in your post so quite frankly im not sure what it is about
Yalls convo that has you upset and making you reconsider not seeing her again. All because she wasnt bubbly and was short? The point of text during booking is to be brief. You said you had already seen her a few times and had a good time so what exactly are you needing via text from her? I would think a quick message can I see you and her reply should be all that's needed. You are booking to see her in person right and you already know that yall have always had a good time so why does it matter if she is short via text as long as she isnt rude? As long as a lady is polite and not rude during the booking process I'm sure most guys wouldnt care if she was brief or short as long as she responded quickly and professionally nothing else should matter. Would you rather have a short quick to the point text conversation so you can be on your way to having a good time than spend 30 mins back and forth wasting time? Maybe some enjoy some banter back and forth, I can understand this if both people are new to each other but when yall have met before I'm not sure why straight to the point wouldn't be ideal.
Cap'n Crunch's Avatar
When I saw the thread name, I thought is was this:

You are banging her from behind, her ass up in the air, elbows on the bed, fingers on the phone, texting away to her friends.

And I gotta tell ya, her texting while we are fucking definitely affects the experience.
CubanAva's Avatar
@Brittany. Like I've said, I'm not trying to chit chat. Just trying to book.

So here's an example from another provider I had contacted simply to ask if she's free. Here's her response.

Hi there,
Yes I definitely am
Xoxo

That comes off better than a "yes". Now I'm not saying that you can't ever have 1 word responses but when that's the norm, I think that's bad customer service.

In regards to this particular provider, her texting persona just doesn't match her in person persona and it's throwing me off. I just wonder if she has a booker. I don't have a problem with bookers as long as it's known. Originally Posted by Foodie1
Now that I better understand what you were saying, it is perfectly fine to feel a bit put off by such a simple text. You are feeling unimportant and undervalued, which is understandable. I wouldn't read too much into it, she may have been busy and even though she didnt have time to thoroughly respond, she wanted to give you a response.
You may want to consider accepting the one worded texts as just being normal from now on so that they dont upset you, you said it yourself that she is a lot more warm in person and isn't that what truly matters? You have seen her, her customer service is obviously not lacking if you have made her your ATF. Do not take away from your actual experience with her, over a text message. That is silly.

Maybe once you two are better acquainted, the texts will become more familiar. Seeing someone twice, even in just a week, isn't enough time to become well acquainted and familiar with someone. Give it time enough to feel it out, you don't even have enough to go on, to establish a baseline yet.

Xo
Miss Valentina's Avatar
@Brittany. Like I've said, I'm not trying to chit chat. Just trying to book.

So here's an example from another provider I had contacted simply to ask if she's free. Here's her response.

Hi there,
Yes I definitely am
Xoxo

That comes off better than a "yes". Now I'm not saying that you can't ever have 1 word responses but when that's the norm, I think that's bad customer service.

In regards to this particular provider, her texting persona just doesn't match her in person persona and it's throwing me off. I just wonder if she has a booker. I don't have a problem with bookers as long as it's known. Originally Posted by Foodie1
Wow you obviously didn't even read anything that I wrote. I had already seen this girl twice in the same week. I'm not some rando wasting time. Besides you're obviously still not understanding the jist of what I'm asking and that is if guys decide not to book due to the vibe given off during texts. I know some guys don't care if a girl is hot and will even tolerate horrible TCB. I for one don't want to see anyone if they're full of attitude for example regardless of looks. Originally Posted by Foodie1
I find it rather odd that a provider responding in timely and affirmative to your inquiry to her availability is considered, in your words "bad customer service". A timely and affirmative response to an inquiry is GREAT customer service, anything extra is just a cherry. Sorry you didn't get your cherry Foodie, I'm certain the cherry is not worth this silly foot-stomping and petulance.

You met a provider, she pleased you enough you booked twice in one week and gave you a service that earned that repeat business. What a blessing, what a joy. Read enough of the failures and disasters that can happen here and she seems the very definition of a delightful and professional provider.

Yet you come to a public board to shame her, even anonymously, because she didn't respond to your texts in a manner you expected her to, even though she wasn't aware you expected that in the first place. Seems unnecessarily punishing no?

Additionally, you seem to be getting easily frustrated, to the point of a bit of rudeness, over responses sent by providers who are responding in good faith. The irony.

I'm sorry to say, you have exposed yourself a bit here, and some of us are noticing. Noticing that perhaps this has little to do with a terse reply on her part, and rather more a neediness, a desire for ego-stroking or, most likely, a sense of entitlement with her since, you know, you did book twice in one week. I could practically see the dripping of entitlement when you outlined that fact.

So ladies, provide this man a great service, not once, but twice in one week but god forbid you answer his text in a timely way with a professionally short answer and suddenly you have provided "horrible TCB" again, in his words. Not only will you get that sting, it's going to earn an entire a co-ed thread about it. Excessive to the point of being not only off-putting but just a touch...scary.

You literally cannot win with some chaps. It's sad when someone would mar what was, by his own account, a wonderful service with a great provider for something so completely facile and vacuous.

Sigh.
Loxly's Avatar
  • Loxly
  • 12-14-2018, 10:48 AM
As I appreciate "oral" skills I'd rather hear a voice and leave simple messages to text. Anything laden with detail is either a PM or an email.

(I have never won a 25 words or less contest!)
lovingcamela's Avatar
I think wanting the texts to be jovial might be expecting too much. If someone answers with a one word phrase they may be multi tasking with a child in tow in the grocery store, in the middle of a class, driving or in the middle of a workout so she can have a hot body for you. I am saying this because when I give one word responses it is because that is all I can do at the moment. I hope you give her another chance.
knotty man's Avatar
you can either have your ego stroked or your dick stoked.
your choice
Alexarose09's Avatar
I dont think you should take it personally. Some people have different styles of texting. I know a guy who is short and to the point and then I know someone who wants to send a million kissy emojis and hearts with everything he says. Both are kind and sweet. Just different.
Britttany_love's Avatar
you can either have your ego stroked or your dick stoked.
your choice Originally Posted by knotty man
For real!!! Ding Ding!!!!
SweetKimberly's Avatar
I HATE texting.


If you want to make an appointment with me, please call. I'm certainly not going to see anyone I've not talked to on the phone. However, if you are a regular companion, that's fine.

I get a few texts a day from random phone numbers. I have no idea who they are. So I ask them to call me, but they never do.

And then there are guys who call and set the appointment. That's awesome. But a few minutes later, they'll start texting me nonstop. "I can't wait to see you. I've been looking forward to seeing you for so long. I can't believe this is really happening. I love your red lips. I love your hair." Etc., etc., etc. So I send them a text cancelling the appointment because they texted me so much. And then they keep texting me wanting to why I cancelled and beg me to get in.

Not to mention, in my ads and on my website it states: "No text messages, please," right in front of my phone number.

:y ikes:

So, needless to say, I hate texting.
pyramider's Avatar
To each their own. Texting to set up appointments should be easy and quick, and I have zero problems with that though I'm short and terse in my communication as well. I'm sure there are providers who are happy to entertain men who text them for reasons that are their own. Here is why I don't express much via text/calls:

A: When I first began, a client's wife found his hobby phone and saw a previous exchange myself and her husband had on that phone. She used the phone to pretend it was him and attempted to set up an appointment, presumably to confront me in person. Had she been successful, she could have potentially landed at my front door to cause a scene. -Moral of the Story- I don't text what I wouldn't want read in front of a judge...or a wife. Thus, I keep it very short, and very clean.

B: Consider the above scenario. Unless I can see who is texting me from that phone, I can't be sure who is on the other line. Should your wife/boss/SO find that phone, they will find no damning communication from me. Part of this job is keeping clients safe from their own security breaches.

C: My phone and text notifications go off constantly. If I were to entertain them with social texts I would likely be spending 5-6 hours a day just to have guffaws and lols at the expense of my time. Even though you may think you're the only one texting, I can assure you, you're not the only one.

D. Men have a tendency to take a lot of liberties with innuendo in these communications. I have no interest in allowing someone to expose me to legal incrimination, nor to entertain vulgarities or petty flirtations.

E: I am a business entity, not a free chat site. We can be flirty, naughty and outrageous in our time together. If one needs attention or someone to talk to, it seems silly at best, and a Timewaster's gambit at worse to hope your service provider will entertain a text flirtation/convo off the clock.

Just my measly two cents. Originally Posted by Miss Valentina
I try to keep things short and sweet for all of the above reasons. The two biggest being that I am incredibly busy with school a lot of the time and when I'm writing a paper or something, stopping to write a treatise by text just isn't possible. Second, for discretion and privacy of the guy. The day of a date, I make sure I have my phone handy in case there is something urgent.

I recently had a guy tell me I was "distant" for this very issue. Since that was the first time I received that insult in my life and I pride myself in being a very warm and kind person to everyone, I took it personally. That might sound silly, but when someone tells you something that is so untrue, it makes you wonder what is going on in the world. He canceled our upcoming date after the comment, so I guess it didn't matter one way or another, but it really felt intentionally hurtful.

I'm not sure that guys always realize that most of the girls they want to see have very full active lives that make them real people, not just someone sitting at an incall "working" all day... Originally Posted by B Three
Exactly. Even with ladies I know I keep it G rated.

For example:

Are you available Tuesday at 3 pm for two hours?


That is all. I generally get a response of "okay, see you then." I text them again the day of the appointment for confirmation.
you can either have your ego stroked or your dick stoked.
your choice Originally Posted by knotty man
That is so far from the truth. The best providers do both which is a huge part of why they are the best. When I see a provider agree with having to choose it lets me know she is still learning and probably won’t be considered an ATF by many.

As for texting with short responses it usually is not an issue for me. One of the few times it was, I was sick and the provider was aware and said I should text her so she could keep me company til I recovered so we could hang out. Her responses were all 1-2 word answers when trying to hold a conversation and I ended up losing interest in her entirely. Another thing that has ruined it for me was when a provider I had seen started sending me spam style texts which were clearly the same she sent to everyone else and even replied to me with these premade messages. Despite having really enjoyed seeing her the first time, I had no interest to see her again after she showed me I wasn’t even worth the few seconds it takes to type a genuine message. One more thing that stands out to me and has killed interest in a provider is when questions are just entirely ignored throughout a conversation. If you do not feel comfortable answering something, it is better to say so than pretend it was never asked. That is just rude and unappealing.
bbjunkies's Avatar
So let's say you meet a provider that you really like and one of the reasons that you like her is that she's really bubbly. However in text, she's really short and cold. 1 or 2 word responses. The texts are not out of line or excessive. They're just to schedule the next session. Does this ruin the experience for you? Originally Posted by Foodie1
I've seen my first provider twice this month. She's really good looking and very sweet, but in text she gets quite cold. I feel you man.

One of reasons that might be the case (in my situation anyway), is that it was my first time seeing her.

The second time after I saw her, she started opened up to me and we chat quite a lot down to personal level.

Since you've already saw her twice, and she still act like that on you, maybe because she a lot of volume so she could careless? Think about how many people sending her text. I don't know man. Just my humble opinion. And I agree, if I've already saw her twice and she still act like that towards me, I would not see her again. It kills the vibe for me. I want to see provider who I can connect.