Falling in Love

Willen's Avatar
Can it happen? Sure. Anything can happen. But over several years on this board and others I've observed how the most experienced posters warn with virtual unanimity AGAINST emotional involvement. And we all think we're the exception to the general rule.

Good luck, and be careful.
Iceman's Avatar
Could I fall in love with a provider? Definitely.

I could not however, maintain a relationship with a provider since I wouldn't want either of us "seeing" anyone else.
offshoredrilling's Avatar
It'd definitely make the stories of "How I met your mother" much more, um, interesting than the stories the average kid would hear.



Cheers,

bcg Originally Posted by bluffcityguy
It get's deeper. I was asked how do you know my mother and dad by a daughter. ahhhh ok in a bar, never telling what kind of bar. Now as the marrige is over and the mother back as provider. Daughter is a stripper and knows the truth(ma told her). I would go and watch her strip. Then I started to take mother with me. Others that work at the stripclub look at me in a funny way now(not often do you see a stripper run off stage and say Ma at the top of her lungs and then give a hug,to us both). I just wish the daughter would stop asking me to sweep her mother off her feet. I would rather remain friend/client to mother. And I would have a hard time watching step-daughter errrrr dance ya thats it dance.
TexRich's Avatar
falling in love with a provider is not what this hobby was meant for. there are plenty of other places to meet and fall in love with someone. friends, well thats different but even that should be taken with precaution.
Assumeing that you have fallen in love:
Q.1: When did you realize that you had fallen in love?

Q.2: What made you fall in love?

I've heard of providers being married. Also read about it in the book: Eleven Minutes...


te=The Famous Lina Lovelle;366057]Is true love really possible in this business, or are we really just kidding ourselves?

What might you do when you think you have really fallen in love with someone under these unique circumstances? [/quote]
I believe that everything is possible but there are a couple of questions. The first one being, who are you falling in love with? The hobbyist or man or the provider or woman? Most of us have a persona that we present, at the very least, we just keep certain things hidden and show other parts of ourselves to our p4p partner. So how would you know that you're falling in love with the real, whole person who's lying next to you?

I'm a strong believer in "just because you can doesn't mean you should". In this business, it's even harder to emotionally align well enough with someone to honestly entertain the possibility of love. Like? You bet, Lust? Geez, I hope so but love? How likely is it that both people get to know eachother well enough and are open and willing to entertain the idea of real, personal relationship. Especially when dealing with a business that is an illusion.

Obviously, it does happen. Business or not, illusion or not, it happens. Real love is rare and doesn't really care what you do for a living. If you have even a tiny chance of finding it, I say hold on with both hands. I don't know how those other, successful couples manage. I know it's unlikely but I'd like to hear their side of the story.
bluffcityguy's Avatar
falling in love with a provider is not what this hobby was meant for. there are plenty of other places to meet and fall in love with someone. Originally Posted by TexRich
Falling in love isn't what church groups (excepting singles groups), school or the workplace was meant for, either, but it happens in those venues. In fact it can happen pretty much anywhere men and women interact.

Cheers,

bcg
This is the Hobby. It ain't Match.com.

IMO, a relationship based simply on sexual attraction or sexual compatability is not likely to hold up in the long run.
  • npita
  • 06-22-2010, 01:25 PM
Is true love really possible in this business, or are we really just kidding ourselves? Originally Posted by The Famous Lina Lovelle
I'm sure it is, but for some reason people assume otherwise because of one or two bad experiences without bothering to consider how many civilian relationships they've been in that also failed.
This is the Hobby. It ain't Match.com.
That's true, but it's also true that where you meet someone is not as important as who you meet, wherever you meet.
IMO, a relationship based simply on sexual attraction or sexual compatability is not likely to hold up in the long run.
Not to put too fine a point on it, but the difference in dating someone and being friends is sex. Also, the time it takes to meet a provider and have sex differs from the time it takes to meet a civilian and have sex differs by about one date. If you meet a provider at a social first, then it's about the same, so sexual attraction factors in to a civilian relationship pretty high on the list of priorities. I really can't think of anyone in my generation or younger (I'm 52) who gets to know a person in depth before both parties are ready to get naked. What's important is that sex is not the only thing you have incommon. I would also think that meeting in the hobby has certain advantages, like not having to explain what you've been doing for a living to people who are not very open minded.
One thing I would like to comment on is that fact that men who go into the Client/Escort world in search of love cause the ladies no insignificant amount of trouble. Please keep this in mind, gents.
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Not to put too fine a point on it, but the difference in dating someone and being friends is sex. I agree, but in my personal experience, I've learned the hard way that the best indicator of a successful, lasting, long term relationship is that the friendship comes FIRST.

What's important is that sex is not the only thing you have in common. Another relationship lesson I learned...the hard wayLOL Originally Posted by npita
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  • Abby
  • 06-22-2010, 06:16 PM
Love can happen anywhere and usually when you don't expect it... in the case of a client provider relationship both parties would have to be extremely open minded or change their lifestyle
Love can happen anywhere and usually when you don't expect it... in the case of a client provider relationship both parties would have to be extremely open minded or change their lifestyle Originally Posted by Abby
Agreed, it's definitely simple in the fact that love hits us involuntarily. Circumstaces are the stresses that make it more difficult than an ordinary relationship. Never say never.
I need to fall in love with a provider about as much as I need another hole in my head! It's complicated enough in the civilian world. If I developed even the slightest crush, I'd never see them again. JMO though.
fun.time.hobbyist's Avatar
Is true love really possible in this business, or are we really just kidding ourselves?

What might you do when you think you have really fallen in love with someone under these unique circumstances? Originally Posted by The Famous Lina Lovelle

Can it happen? Yes. Is it necessarily going to work? The odds are definitely against you on this one. It's a slippery slope to go down this road. I've been there and will never go back there again. If I ever start to fall for a provider again, I'll pack up and never see her again. I'm not here for love. I forgot that once, got burned and lost a lot of $$$ in the process.

That being said, if it were to have any chance of working, both of you would have to make drastic changes in your lifestyles. Guys like to say they can handle it, but in reality it's not as easy as it sounds. The best route would be for the 2 of you to have a serious discussion and leave this world behind. It's not easy, but can happen. It's extremely rare for it to work out. Just my $0.02

FTH