...But if she was down and depressed there is STILL no reason to take anothers life because of your problems...A suicide never thinks of the pain and suffering that loved ones must endure,and questions that are never answered because of their selfishness .......thats my two cents worth ....T
Originally Posted by tsrv4me
You are right... but it's not quite that simple. When you are in that sort of place you can't apply reasoning and logic. I can't emphasize this enough, if you haven't been at that point, you really don't understand it.
It's not fair to pass judgement on someone for this sort of thing. The old adage "walk a mile in someone else's shoes" is entirely appropriate - though in this case it would be "live a few months in someone else's depression".
In many ways it is very selfish of survivors to blame the dead person for the hurt and suffering the survivor feels. It's not their fault you are feeling that way. They were hurting and they chose a way to make their pain go away forever. One could say they took the "cowards" way out. But is that really correct? Or even appropriate? Most people shy away from the idea of suicide for a variety of reasons, be they religious, social or simply biological.
When a soldier charges a machine gun nest and knows its probably a suicide charge, just for the possibility that one of his squad mates will get close enough to toss a grenade in there, that's a hero's death. He knew he was going to die, but he did it anyway for the chance that someone else might live. That's okay because it's an 'us vs. them' sort of ideal.
Yet when a person who has seen their life crumble around them, is hurting and chooses to stop the hurt and refuses to be burden on others, we call that person a coward for taking their own life. How is it cowardly? How many of us can say we have braved our own demons and we are at the point where we can choose to live or die? It takes a LOT to get yourself to the precipice and throw yourself over.
It would appear that what she did was pre-meditated. She was an adult and she chose to live (and end) her life as she saw fit. It is indeed unfortunate that she took her daughter's life as well. Perhaps she thought she was sparing her daughter from the lifelong pain of losing both parents, of having everything she knew taken away from her. We might never know. And, lets be honest here, for most of us we didn't know the family so any outrage or disgust is misplaced. It doesn't affect us, we didn't know them, so we are merely speculating and expressing our opinions.
But one good question to ask yourself is this - are you more upset about the act, or the fact that you are confronted with your own mortality and you don't like being reminded you too are going to die eventually?