What negative impact might the hobby have on you that will stay with you forever... good or bad?

Well yeah. That's the negative part of it. Because say you're in a "monogamous" relationship. But you've exposed to so many instances of something happening, (men cheating on their wives with you) what do you think your general consensus would be?

lol, ummm.... hate to be the one who ruins your "vow"... but it really doesnt matter if we are getting alot of sex at home either. for "many" of us ..not all, but "MANY"...

its variety! its the chase! and its parting ways with no strings attached! Originally Posted by lasvegas
well now you getting into therapy talk! lol (not laughing at you) just past sessions with ex-wife... trust has nothing to do with the other person/your partner. it has everything to do with you. you control your own trust.
i was reading a great article about the different generations.... pre 80's men and women just did not talk about their cheating. they took their secrets to the grave. post 80's the era of oprah... where they say to share EVERYTHING with their partner in order to heal, it does not work! couples just dont recover well for the majority... its what i read..lol
Beagle's Avatar
My buddy's wife would rather have plausible denial that he cheated on her, than to have the cheating confirmed. If it comes out in the open, she'd be forced to take some action.......and it's not a reality she's ready to confront.....

Some secrets should stay as secrets.....
SpiceItUp's Avatar
Oh no I wasn't suggesting that if you feed us and fuck us we still won't be hunting for variety! That would just be against nature!
SgtGonzo's Avatar
lol I have long story about how the hobby has negatively impacted me, some of you would be mad and disagree, others would be yea i can see that, but it does have some nice positive notes in it. Its too long to write. Its part sad, part funny, has villains and heroes.

Thats it…thats the negative impact the hobby has given me. I need to write a novel. Im such a procrastinator though. Ugh fuck you eccie you're going to make me write a novel
It's like a bitter sweet scenario. It's allowing me a lot of freedom to do what I need to do... I have school starting in a few weeks and will have to dedicate at least 30 hours a week they said to my studies. It doesn't necessarily make me not trust men, but I'm not naive to the fact that men have wandering eyes and fingers...
Dice man1983's Avatar
Not all men. I have never cheated but hobby when not in a relationship, and if I got married I would forget about the hobby
KlassyKelliAnn's Avatar
We all are here for different reasons. For the most part it's cash & ass. But the hobby definitely can have a lasting effect on you in many different ways. How do you think the hobby might change you forever. Originally Posted by Still Looking

Lasting effects..... Lets see...

Well of course the obvious is what most have already said above me- about men and relationships and the variety of reasons etc.

Other lasting effects... Money.... I now have a RW career but before I did and while I was in the process of earning it I hobbied, a few times I quit hobbying and did various other jobs. The money was a big deal. It is difficult knowing you could be working only 2-4 hours and make hundreds vs being at a job all damn day for $10-50 an hr. So when I finally give it up, this thought will have a lasting effect.

Other things would be the insight into this world and how it has opened me up personally to all sorts of things I may never have tried otherwise but now enjoy. I have become more independent, stronger, aware of so much that like I mentioned, I would have been oblivious to otherwise. You learn things about women as well as men in this business whether it be through the men talking of their SO or interacting with other providers. All types of people, all colors, from so many different places- it broadens the mind in a way.
So much more is involved than the sex that is being sold and bought. No one outside this world sees that part. So the lasting effect? The ability to understand that and to be non judgmental, the want and need to just live and let live, what you are capable of as well as what others are capable of, the power of that sixth sense you acquire, if you will, and most importantly knowing how to use it.


KKA
Not all men. I have never cheated but hobby when not in a relationship, and if I got married I would forget about the hobby Originally Posted by Dice man1983
Will you marry me?!
I am with Tracy on this one. The hobby has opened my eyes and mind to so much that I was naive to in the past. About men and relationships. Not all men cheat or stray, but MOST do. I enjoy talking with the men that have SOs because I like to hear what it is their wife is (or is not) doing that is causing them to stray. In a way, I believe this makes my relationship with my SO stronger. I know what to do and not to do to satisfy him and make him happy.
I also agree with KKA...it's definitely changed the way I view RW jobs. The money I make with RW jobs is NO WHERE near the money you can make in the hobby. The hobby is a wonderful thing for me because college is SO expensive.
Also, when I first started in the hobby, the money I was making was very good and I started splurging here and there and got the mind-set that I could just make more money later and there was really no need to save so much. HA! I have since learned that I should save as much money as I possibly can as often as possible.
These are the two biggest lasting effects the hobby has had on me. Other than that, it's also given me a chance to meet and spend time with some very nice and exciting people. Ladies included. I am and have always been a people person. Because of this I have done very well in this community.
I cannot think of any negative effects it has had on me. And I would hope it hasn't had any negative effects on anyone. If so, I would hope they would remove themselves from the hobby before it causes permanent damage to themselves.
If so, I would hope they would remove themselves from the hobby before it causes permanent damage to themselves. Originally Posted by SweetCara

If he doesn't marry you, I will

But I agree. I wouldn't say anything is so negative. The hobby has sharpened my intuition and other things. But for the most part the hobby has been very good to me
If he doesn't marry you, I will
Originally Posted by Tracy Auburn
I've heard wonderful things about that sexy booty of yours missy! With that said..."I DO!!" Hehe!!
Is 'same sex' marriage legal in Texas yet? HAHA!!
e_l traveler's Avatar
Downsides for me is the money I keep spending on this hobby that isn't being saved by my wasteful self, and the frustrations I've encountered with some BP chicas. These downsides are somewhat inconsequential complaints though. On the other hand, for the ECCIE VPs I have met, 2 thumbs up and a woo-hoo!
sms918's Avatar
sorry off topic but,

sweetcara and tracy auburn, thanks for the images. Only seen sweetcara in a public setting and didn't talk, but her and tracy wow two redheads. i can't be the only one thinking it.

let's see negative impact the hobby has me, good or bad. all in how you look at it. I have no wife, no so,(just me personally, to each his own, I couldn't be in this hobby if I had either, like other hobbyist said I would quit)

I don't see hobby as being wrong, people have fun, both get things out of it. Some either go to far, or don't treat others as people, but that's like anything in life.

Your not going to get along with everyone, some you may never see, some once, some often, some casual, some friends, some rw friends.

good or bad? obviously I'm not fond of title of thread
The only negative for me in the hobby was discovering how wonderful sex can be with someone you have a "connection" with. My ATF had that connection and sex with her was the best sex I've ever had. In essence she spoiled me with how good sex can be. I've been married for 30 years now and my wife has never enjoyed sex at all; its a necessary "evil" of marriage to her unfortunately. I've had been hobbling for about 10 years before meeting my ATF. The sex was definitely better than with my wife but it wasn't great. My ATF and I had a thing going for 2 years before she ended it. Since then provider sex is no better than with my wife. Consequently, I've only seen 3 providers one time each in the past 18 months. Compared to what I had with my ATF, sex has been very unexciting.