Reference etiquette

Touche.

I can never forget a face, but that does not help with references much. If I saw someone once over a year ago, with a very common name and a handle with no history, it can become difficult. Especially when dealing with fake names/real names, handles etc. I also do not keep notes or save #'s, unless I know for certain, it is okay.



Can't tell anyone what ya don't know. That can be a good thing.
Guest121917-1's Avatar
If a guy gives me two refrences but he has more in reviews I reach out to those ladies as well. I want the whole scoop and nothing but the scoop. Ladies need to screen.
we are letting cavemen like whispers roam around with his club haha. Sorry I had to flirt with you.
I cant say that my statement before was completwly accurate but if I have only seen a guy once I will tell her I saw him once and the length of time in which it had been since I have seen him.
I have a hard time with names also, but I have a reciept book that helps me, or sometimes I have to ask the girl to ask them to tell them something I could remember for them. I give references with all my gents as long as the sessions good, which I have never had to deal with an asshole (knock on wood). I have had lots of girls ask me for refs and I help, but when time comes to ask them, crickets.... Its quite annoying really, so now I just keep them in my mail folder of unanswered or in my notes and I ignore there request when they ask.
If a hobbyist is on his game, just as we expect the providers to be with their TCB, then the hobbyist might alert his former lady friend with a short PM that he plans to use her as a reference, and remind her when/what happened, etc. He might also point her to a review that he prepared as a reminder that he took additional time to help her promote her business with a review of the session.

It is a two-way street and we should support those who deserve it--through responding to reference requests for the ladies, and by posting accurate reviews when positive experiences warrant. One hand washing the other, so to speak.

The guys should also post reviews when the experience is not stellar, but I would not expect a lady that did not deserve a positive review to be someone who a hobbyist would list as a reference. But that information is available to the providers if they wish to pursue it.

In any case, providers should also check random sampling of other ladies seen by the hobbyist, but not provided as references. Just like a good investigator does when doing a background check she may see indicators that there are others who might have relevant information about the hobbyist.

We all live by our reputations here on the boards and with the hobby.

My two cents. FWIW
If a hobbyist is on his game, just as we expect the providers to be with their TCB, then the hobbyist might alert his former lady friend with a short PM that he plans to use her as a reference, and remind her when/what happened, etc. He might also point her to a review that he prepared as a reminder that he took additional time to help her promote her business with a review of the session.

It is a two-way street and we should support those who deserve it--through responding to reference requests for the ladies, and by posting accurate reviews when positive experiences warrant. One hand washing the other, so to speak.

The guys should also post reviews when the experience is not stellar, but I would not expect a lady that did not deserve a positive review to be someone who a hobbyist would list as a reference. But that information is available to the providers if they wish to pursue it.

In any case, providers should also check random sampling of other ladies seen by the hobbyist, but not provided as references. Just like a good investigator does when doing a background check she may see indicators that there are others who might have relevant information about the hobbyist.

We all live by our reputations here on the boards and with the hobby.

My two cents. FWIW Originally Posted by BugleBoy

Definitely a good idea. Also, I have been used as a reference a few times and it definitely, DEFINITELY helps to have some sort of contact with the gent using me as a reference so that I can try and remember who it was. Especially if it was someone I saw when I was starting out. (Ex--several months back).
VictoriaLyn's Avatar
For the love of bacon...when asked "how will she remember you?" Don't reply back with only..'tell her the guy named Bob who saw her 2 months ago "...Really ..giving me a very common name is not going to make you stick out to her....

I always try to give a fast response when one needs a refs its just good manners to respond and not ignore ... even if you dont want to share your client atleast respond back with I dont give refs...
I hate when Im told well I saw so n so but you cant contact her because she gives me hell when I see someone else.....
For the love of bacon...when asked "how will she remember you?" Don't reply back with only..'tell her the guy named Bob who saw her 2 months ago "...Really ..giving me a very common name is not going to make you stick out to her....

I always try to give a fast response when one needs a refs its just good manners to respond and not ignore ... even if you dont want to share your client atleast respond back with I dont give refs...
I hate when Im told well I saw so n so but you cant contact her because she gives me hell when I see someone else..... Originally Posted by VictoriaLyn
I am so glad I am not the only one annoyed by this, lol!
Just send me a pic of his equipment. Easy peasy! Kidding! Kidding!
Please do NOT do that. It infuriates me to wake up to pix of male genatalia. You go straight to the "go fuck yourself" list. It is so rude, imo. Like we don't see enough in person? Maybe the guys that do that think we need more anatomy classes?
I am so glad I am not the only one annoyed by this, lol!
Just send me a pic of his equipment. Easy peasy! Kidding! Kidding!
Please do NOT do that. It infuriates me to wake up to pix of male genatalia. You go straight to the "go fuck yourself" list. It is so rude, imo. Like we don't see enough in person? Maybe the guys that do that think we need more anatomy classes? Originally Posted by Scarlett Rossi
Lol ok I dont want unsolicited penis pics either but I have had a few times where a clients swore up and down he saw me before and I just didnt remember him and as soon as they pull their pants down everything come back to me lol. I may forget a face but never a penis.
It's frustrating when you don't do reviews for reasons of safety and privacy yet, me in this case,( damn straight I speak for myself) are consistently straight forward with providers. If I only see Scarlett the remainder of my life on here than so be it. The rest of you who expect me to have 10 reviews can take a hike, I plan to start doing reviews real soon, but it will only be the providers who appreciate a regular.

Peace
I may forget a face but never a penis. Originally Posted by NikkiWhite
MS Nikki--You really break me up. I believe that after 50+ reviews and who knows how many sessions, I too have problems remembering the names and faces of the providers, but like you: "I may forget the face but never her pussy."

When are we going to play some ping pong my dear?

BugleBoy of Austin TX

P.S. And Ladies, please don't hesitate to ask me in person why I always have the the little surfer dude on my signature? You'll be happy you did!

El Cid's Avatar
... I hate when Im told well I saw so n so but you cant contact her because she gives me hell when I see someone else..... Originally Posted by VictoriaLyn
Whaaat! Do we also have to worry about jealous providers? !!
VictoriaLyn's Avatar
Whaaat! Do we also have to worry about jealous providers? !! Originally Posted by El Cid

Have you been cheating on me? lol


Never from me thats for sure I like to share
Wiley Fuchs's Avatar
Personally, I am reluctant to provide providers' names or contact information for a reference. It seems that I would be stealing time and business from my current provider, and possible rude in doing so. Also, there is response time to consider with references.

(Note: my perspective is from a point of view where I have provider affinity and that I am too good of a client to lose. I do step out for a tryst with a tart occasionally on a whim.)

1) Seems that I am breaking private client-provider confidentiality and rude to share another provider's name without permission;

2) It is work for me to ask a current provider to be reference and get her approval to share her name and contact information; It takes time for this correspondence.

3) It is even more work for a current provider to share information about me with the potential future provider, all with the probability that my current provider will be losing future business from me. There is communication response time to consider here, as well.


Instead of providing reference names, I recommend to the potential future provider to search for my postings and reviews on ECCIE, or simply use P411 to view my OKs.

Perhaps, providers have a way to OK clients upfront on ECCIE as they do on P411 or similar web sites.
Kit-4-Kat's Avatar
My memory is amazing in regard to recalling clients. You can call me three years later and I'm still remember yoy. It's been shocking fellas and me for years. But, I do have an occasional blank and require memory jogs.

Response time can make or break a date. If a fella sees only the latest flava, she's probably to busy to reply or already made her money and left the scene.

Some bitches (daddyslilslut) use intimidation tactics against their clients who use her as a reference. She'll refuse to respond until he sees her again - she may offer to undercut the requested ladies rate - or have you play WK for her next provider bashing posting spree. In the past, when she allowed reviews, you'd be required to post one of her before she'd consider a reference. There may be other ladies with these practices. I certainly hope not... at least not anywhere I'm going to be.

BTW, this is NOT conjecture or made up out of thin air. Just educating the masses. Any questions? :-)
Qziz's Avatar
  • Qziz
  • 01-06-2014, 09:22 PM
Someday women may remember me. *sigh*