NFL and Houston Texans Superthread: Are we ready for some football?

TheDon's Avatar
Yo Ded, get yourself a Kicker for our league tomorrow, Bryant has a bye brother.
Yo Ded, get yourself a Kicker for our league tomorrow, Bryant has a bye brother. Originally Posted by TheDon
Yeah I know...unless Romo kills it again, I'll be ok
Ok Mr. McJoke Texans owner let's review.

1. We set records for most pick 6's in a row.
2. Our nut less coach can't figure out that his QB is awful
3. We are 2 terrific plays away from being 0-6
4. Other teams know our Waffle House menu better than we do
5. We didn't score a TD in 9 straight quarters
6. We got laughed at on national tv by collingworth and michaels and the nation.
7. We have a coach that won't allow audibles by his QB.
8. We have a coach that won't use that lump in his head that used to be a brain. Just read the menu please.
9. At least our D Coordinator and special teams coaches kick ass........... NOT!!!
10. I just shit(Took a BIG Kubiak)on your porch!!!

Fire somebody you jackass!!! Can't believe I am about to say this but I wish we had Bud Adams!!! Fuck me!! And oh yeah, we coulda had Peyton Manning!!! Thanks you jerkoff!! And we get out coached every Sunday!!!!!!!!
Solemate62's Avatar
Daddio, you should get paid to rewrite the 12 steps of AA and I'd go to meetings more often 'cause it would be so entertaining and funny!
And ooh yeah Mr McJoke, you have a head coach that is scared. Coach Scarediak, calls plays to keep it close instead of calling plays to win! Face it McJoke your coach is a pussy and his team plays like they are coached. At least we wore pink today, Kubes prolly wears it everyday. His panties at least!!!

Schaub = Dopey, Turtleboy, Pussy
Kubiak = Kubes, Lubes, Scarediak, Pussy, Where da side of bacon at?
McNair= McJoke, Mcjackass, Mcnothing, McStupid, Pussy
Wade Phillips = Interim, Future quick weight loss spokesman, Pussy
Gruden= Available, winning, Super Bowl ring
Daddio= Genius, Snatch, former season ticket holder, pussy chaser
Don't worry it will get better next week the Chiefs only had 10 sacks today!! Andy Reed is gonna Queen Kubiak next week. He will smother poor Gary Scarediak when he sits on his face. "Can't Wait!!!"
Satin's Avatar
  • Satin
  • 10-13-2013, 09:02 PM
I told you boys it was coming...rotflmmfao!!!

That shit was better than the "they are who we thought they were" rant....dude you made me laugh so hard I temporarily forgot about the fact our team is now the joke of the NFL......keep it up big daddy!!!

Man, I would love to see the look on his face when you ring his doorbell and show him a big pile of shit on his front porch! Fucking classic!!!
john353's Avatar
Say Playa...this shit is funnier than comedy central.
capitan1962's Avatar
I would comment here but what could I possibly say that hasn't been said? What great entertainment this thread is.
BigLouie's Avatar
Ok Mr. McJoke Texans owner let's review.

And oh yeah, we coulda had Peyton Manning!!! ! Originally Posted by Daddio
NOT TRUE. The Texans had no where near the money needed to sign Peyton Manning. Why do you think we had to let some linemen walk. We had NO cap space. And do not give me the talk about Manning coming here for less for a better team, Denver got further with a worse QB. Denver was the best option for him as it was the best team that could offer the most money.
BigLouie's Avatar
Gruden= Available, winning, Super Bowl ring Originally Posted by Daddio
Again, not entirely true. Yes he won a Super Bowl but he has a reputation of being terrible with QBs, many claim he won with Tony's players. He is available because it appears he does not want to coach again and because no pro team is all that interested in him.

Quick tell me how many coaches left the game and came back and were successful? Give me a number.
DEAR_JOHN's Avatar
NOT TRUE. The Texans had no where near the money needed to sign Peyton Manning. Why do you think we had to let some linemen walk. We had NO cap space. And do not give me the talk about Manning coming here for less for a better team, Denver got further with a worse QB. Denver was the best option for him as it was the best team that could offer the most money. Originally Posted by BigLouie
BL is right.

I find this whole Peyton Manning deal laughable.

Nobody knew how well his neck problems would hold up, and teams were afraid to take a chance paying PM big money, knowing the first hard hit may end his career.

However two years after the fact, we all know Denver made the right move......and here come the football gurus saying we should have brought PM in. Hind site is 20/20.
Again, not entirely true. Yes he won a Super Bowl but he has a reputation of being terrible with QBs, many claim he won with Tony's players. He is available because it appears he does not want to coach again and because no pro team is all that interested in him.

Quick tell me how many coaches left the game and came back and were successful? Give me a number. Originally Posted by BigLouie
I don't have a number but I have a name: Dick Vermeil.
BL is right.

I find this whole Peyton Manning deal laughable.

Nobody knew how well his neck problems would hold up, and teams were afraid to take a chance paying PM big money, knowing the first hard hit may end his career. Originally Posted by DEAR_JOHN
You're right, it is laughable!

Other than throw the Dude a rope, there is not much left we can do.

How long can he hold on?

TheDon's Avatar
It's true that we couldn't get Manning.

That doesn't change the fact that Dopey and Kubiak love to suck cock. That is what we need to be focusing on.