This is Rude on a Lot of Different Levels

I can see not replying if a reference comes back bad - you do NOT ever want to tell a client "Oh so and so said you were rough with her" as that can have safety repercussions for the other provider. Even writing and saying "I checked with a couple of your okays and they said X, Y, Z" can be - as the guy can usually figured out who would say what. In that case, no reply is appropriate.

I try to reply to everything I get, even if I'm not in that town that day, unavailable, or whatever the case is. I try to simply reply and say "I am not available on X time on Y date in Z city, my apologies. I hope our paths cross in the future!"

I've also seen autoresponders that say something like "I am unavailable X-X dates, if your request is for one of those days please accept my apology in advance for not replying".

I think silence/crickets/suspense though is unprofessional.

Charles, until recently, I would've generally agreed with you about a no response being kind of rude. After spending a couple of 3-4 day stretches OTC with a well reviewed provider, I wanted to throw her phone into the deepest part of the f*ing ocean!! 10-30 calls per day, same for texts, emails, voicemails, etc. It would take a full time assistant to deal with all the damn messages. Shit!! Anyway, I have a totally different perspective now seeing what she, and all ladies, have to deal with. Charles, it's not personal, believe me, it's just the only way she can stay sane!

I know where you are coming from, and I also have to agree with Missy above. I have had providers give me not so great refs. So I told this one guy I did not think we would be a good fit. Left it at that. He still emails me, getting more aggressive. I told him please stop, we are really not a good fit at this point. I will not reveal what the other providers told me as that would be betraying them. I do not have to see everyone, I am sorta picky as to who I see. I have a good rep within the community (Denver).
I do reply to every P411 request, I do look at the profile. It is my understanding that if a provider fails to reply, you can let Gina know on that one. I am going on vacation and put it in my P411 as such, and I have an auto respond on my email that states that. I do not take calls until someone has passed screening. Saves me time and BS. I don't need last minute bookings. It has never hurt me to be email only until I know you, because I maintain a very high level of service.
I have a few days scheduled with a client, and have made it clear that I am not to be contacted until after that point. It's a respect thing IMO

Oh please, if someone does not respond at first...give it a 2nd shot

If someone stills does not respond, then I guess the bigger question for me would be why would you want to continue to see her????

In the Internet Age, no reply = NO. No need to take it personal or get butthurt over it. Once you know the rules and accept them, it gets much easier.

Not sure why someone would not respond... word of mouth travels further and faster than reviews. Being rude to one guy and just not responding... can come back and bite ya..
now.. that being said... if its a girl new to P411.. it may not be her fault. When I first started I didnt think I got any requests.. it was soo slow for months.. And then i realized by mistake that appt requests go to the email, NOT to P411.
But... established ladies, there really isnt much of an excuse. Even if you dont want to see the guy.. simply tell him that due to maybe.. possible personality clash or maybe you feel that the two of you would not mesh well.. you are going to have to decline and then simply be nice and tell him thank you for his interest. And whether youre busy or not.. it only takes 2 minutes to respond to a damn request. If youre THAT busy than ur way too high volume and should probably give your vajayjay a vacation.

I always respond promptly. But I suggest you check out the last time they logged in, before sending an appointment request. If I am really busy with something else I won't even log in. When I do log in, I will apologize for not replying in a timely manner.

appointment requests go to your email. So do notices for new messages. So as long as she's checking her emails she should be aware that there's activity there.

And the ladies' names appear in order of when they last logged in, most recent to most long ago. If a lady hasn't logged in for several days, I don't even bother. If it's been a month, I assume she has an SO or is otherwise out of circulation.

Glad I did search on this very topic, some sage advice here. Puts my thoughts of wasted research time into perspective.

Why are the ladies telling you no or not responding.

Are you polite when booking
Do you talk about services
Are you rude
Are your refs good
Did you provide ref or just ask "are u available"
Do you state date and time you would like or keep her guessing.

No man wants to hear why a lady will not see them. Its gets really hairy and uncomfortable.

Having said that, just to not respond at all is freaking rude.

I try to cover all the bases with a request:

Why are the ladies telling you no or not responding.

Are you polite when booking: Absolutely.
Do you talk about services: Never. I can read.
Are you rude: Only once was I rude, but I still think it was deserved.
Are your refs good: Most are top-notch from well reviewed and known ladies.
Did you provide ref or just ask "are u available": Most of my requests are made through P411 so refs are provided.
Do you state date and time you would like or keep her guessing. My standard is to suggest a day and time a couple of days in advance, and allow her to suggest a different time if she has a conflict.

No man wants to hear why a lady will not see them. Its gets really hairy and uncomfortable. If she doesn't want to see me, I would appreciate knowing immediately just like my sig line says. I'm OK with cutting off all contact. I don't go where I'm not wanted.

Having said that, just to not respond at all is freaking rude. Originally Posted by lisa.lisa0302

I dunno Charlie, is there any way the lady could associate your p411 info to your board handle on here? And if so, it could just be that she was afraid to see you as you can be quite a grump at times ...just a thought.

I dunno Charlie, is there any way the lady could associate your p411 info to your board handle on here? And if so, it could just be that she was afraid to see you as you can be quite a grump at times ...just a thought. Originally Posted by Valerie

I don't hide who I am anywhere.

I get your point, but my persona that is here does not appear BCD. BCD I am at all times polite and a gentleman. I don't need alerts or anything negative flowing from someone I've seen.

I don't hide who I am anywhere.

I get your point, but my persona that is here does not appear BCD. BCD I am at all times polite and a gentleman. I don't need alerts or anything negative flowing from someone I've seen. Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

I don't doubt this, but board persona can mean a lot. Story time!

There was a guy in Canada named Mr. O who was well, a dick. He started threads regularly on how much money providers MUST make (often calculating that we made 250/hr 40 hours a week which is utterly ludicrous) and how no one ever pays taxes and he was just generally...mean, anti-provider, and off putting. Most of the guys didn't like him, and pretty much none of the women.

As there wasn't a lot of screening, he never really had to provide his board handle and he sees a few of the local ladies. Once he reviews them and people COULD associate his board handle with his phone number, he went on pretty much everyone's do not see list.

It's not to say you're anything like Mr. O - but board persona matters a lot to some people. And if your general cynicism (which I see more as honesty) turns off a lady here, she may not reply to your request.