All I Was Trying 2 Get Across Was The Value Of Having A Backup Provider

I'm not using any Family Guy quotes here. I was giving tough love using jokes and all earlier, but now it's time for seriousness.

You're creeping me the fuck out with all this stuff you're babbling on about here. You're basically saying that you're a great guy and women should love you and want to be with you but they wont because you're not rich. So you are deserving of them but you do not have them because they are all money grubbing whores or they have alterior motives that you're too smart not to see right through or they just stupid? Or is it evil? You're posts sound like Chapter 2 of every true crime novel that Ann Rule has ever written. It sounds like part of some kind of serial killer manifesto. I would imagine that your two threads on this subject have probably gotten you added to about 50 DNS lists.



You need to lighten the fuck up and enjoy life and not worry about people who don't see you as you see yourself.

Ok, I can see part of where warrior13 is coming from. I'm one of those "Nice Guys" that never got anywhere significant with Women for the first 15 or so Years of my Adult Life (post turning 18). That's just the way it goes sometimes. Once I got to the point of dating Women in their mid-30's to lower 40's the story changed. A lot of them were divorced and/or had Kids. And it amazed me how many of them told me "I should have Married someone like you instead of X". But that was in the Civie world.
Post having been married 10 Years now and Hobbying for about 5 Years. I will say the following. My preferance has always been to have one primary Provider and at least one alternate if possible. The alternates were just other girls Providing that I knew about and maybe had a date or 2 with when my primary wasn't available. This has turned out to be a good thing since one of my former Primaries inexplexibly ripped me off and dumped me as a client and another (due to some changes in her life) decided to go UTR and only maintain a very select and small group of clients local to her (I was not unfortunately).
As for warrior13's assertion that "Girlfriends" are free. What planet are you living on? No woman in the universe is "Free". When we're "Courting" we take them out, pay for their dinner, movie, etc. After we marry them we pay their bills, for clothes, shoes, a home, etc. Even if they have good jobs of their own. At least I can say Providers are honest and up front about what they expect to get out of a "Relationship" with a Hobbyist.

Not all girls are impressed by money so maybe try impressing a lady with whatever your best asset is(Humor,personality,skill at whatever) ...Change of approach,change of attitude might be all thats needed to impress Originally Posted by VictoriaLyn

Totally unrelated but I like your signature lol

I'm probably not in the right mindset but tend to not think about having backups and just try to focus on whomever I'm planning to see after narrowing down a couple and if that date doesn't go through then just choose another one <---- don't know if that makes sense it does still kinda seem like backups, I guess I don't know how to explain it other than I jot down a couple I like and research the top choice and if it doesn't go through then I start all over with the other one...

So, women don't like men who don't have a lot of money. They don't like you because you currently don't have a lot of money. Did I get that right?

So, women who like men without jobs are trying to fix them. They don't like you because you don't have anything to fix. Right?

There are women who aren't looking for men with money or for men to fix. There may not be a lot of them out there, but they are out there. Just a friendly FYI.

You have mentioned predatory practices in this thread and alluded to them in your previous thread. Can you provide more detail? I could try to guess, but would rather just see what you consider to be predatory practices.

That might be true broke and pathetic guys have girlfriends but usually those girls who are willing to accept guys like that are playing a game of challenge trying to see if they can improve the guy. Those kind of girls will look at me as a guy who is trying to do something good in my life and they know I will treat them right so therefore I won't be a challenge to improve in their eyes. Originally Posted by warrior13

I suspect this might fall on deaf ears but I'll try one time.

Having read a number of your posts I have a few observations. You can take or lose them as you wish.

First, you seem overly fixated on having "one escort", and considering every other lady a back-up plan. There is nothing wrong with that, but if you are that worried about your one escort (of the moment) breaking it off I would expect you wouldn't repeat having such an exclusive relationship again. I value getting familiar with a lady, but one would have expected you to spread your time and attention across 2 or 3 ladies the next time around.

I also scratch my head at your financial comments. Not enough money to take a civi date to dinner, or a movie, or a hike & picnic--but enough for a regular escort? Seems odd.

Then there is your abrupt improvement in grammar & typing. If the well written one was an anomaly, then you might want to take more care in using spell checker, etc. Women--just as anyone else--often reply better to good grammar. Just a suggestion. If it wasn't an anomaly then I wonder what changed? Without an explanation, some folks might jump to wrong conclusions.

So, women don't like men who don't have a lot of money. They don't like you because you currently don't have a lot of money. Did I get that right?

So, women who like men without jobs are trying to fix them. They don't like you because you don't have anything to fix. Right?

There are women who aren't looking for men with money or for men to fix. There may not be a lot of them out there, but they are out there. Just a friendly FYI.

You have mentioned predatory practices in this thread and alluded to them in your previous thread. Can you provide more detail? I could try to guess, but would rather just see what you consider to be predatory practices. Originally Posted by emptywallet

I know that there is a low population of girls who don't look at guys for their money, but the chances of finding them are about the same chances u have of buying a winning lottery ticket. It may be possible but the chances of it happening are so low that I might as well not get my hopes up too high hoping it will happen

I'll explain the question about "enough money for escorts but not enough money to take "free" girls out" Taking a girl out is only part of the financial equation needed to impress a "free" girl. U still gotta be able to have her trust that she will be able to go on vacations, shopping sprees and have luxury cars on rims and all of that is gonna be way more than the $100-$200 I spend on escort sessions

Ok, I can see part of where warrior13 is coming from. I'm one of those "Nice Guys" that never got anywhere significant with Women for the first 15 or so Years of my Adult Life (post turning 18). That's just the way it goes sometimes. Once I got to the point of dating Women in their mid-30's to lower 40's the story changed. A lot of them were divorced and/or had Kids. And it amazed me how many of them told me "I should have Married someone like you instead of X". But that was in the Civie world.
Post having been married 10 Years now and Hobbying for about 5 Years. I will say the following. My preferance has always been to have one primary Provider and at least one alternate if possible. The alternates were just other girls Providing that I knew about and maybe had a date or 2 with when my primary wasn't available. This has turned out to be a good thing since one of my former Primaries inexplexibly ripped me off and dumped me as a client and another (due to some changes in her life) decided to go UTR and only maintain a very select and small group of clients local to her (I was not unfortunately).
As for warrior13's assertion that "Girlfriends" are free. What planet are you living on? No woman in the universe is "Free". When we're "Courting" we take them out, pay for their dinner, movie, etc. After we marry them we pay their bills, for clothes, shoes, a home, etc. Even if they have good jobs of their own. At least I can say Providers are honest and up front about what they expect to get out of a "Relationship" with a Hobbyist. Originally Posted by RochBob

I see somebody see things like I do

I know that there is a low population of girls who don't look at guys for their money, but the chances of finding them are about the same chances u have of buying a winning lottery ticket. It may be possible but the chances of it happening are so low that I might as well not get my hopes up too high hoping it will happen Originally Posted by warrior13

I'm pretty sure your analogy is an exaggeration, but I won't argue the point. I might just be lucky in one area and unlucky in another (lotto).

But what about my question...

You have mentioned predatory practices in this thread and alluded to them in your previous thread. Can you provide more detail? I could try to guess, but would rather just see what you consider to be predatory practices.

Point one, for those of you with a SO, how many have another girl ready to fill the void should your SO totally and unexpectedly decide to fly the coop? I think I can answer that one. It would be zero. Nobody has a second lady "lined up" to be the next SO should something happen. Why the OP went there is totally alien to me b/c his actual point was a very interesting one.

I think some providers don't like to get that close to a client. When the line between client and provider begins to blur, problems could occur. Maybe she feels that the client will start to want freebies at some point. Maybe the provider feels she could get attached to the client (Pretty Woman) and wants to avoid the inevitable rejection before it happens. Maybe it is the opposite in that the provider wants to prevent the client from developing feelings for her. I think the original question is very good. When talking about providers, I think we all have options A, B and C. That is just part of the game. One last thing, I honestly think it is living dangerous if either a client or provider has an all-time favorite. I'm not saying it is bad. Just saying it could be dangerous.

I'm pretty sure your analogy is an exaggeration, but I won't argue the point. I might just be lucky in one area and unlucky in another (lotto).

But what about my question...

You have mentioned predatory practices in this thread and alluded to them in your previous thread. Can you provide more detail? I could try to guess, but would rather just see what you consider to be predatory practices. Originally Posted by emptywallet

Oh yea about those predatory practices, I was just basically talking about providers wo might try 2 rob guys, rush your service or just flat out offer dull service

As with all things in life, the Boondocks has a lesson for us:



Also a classic... now in HD!

... to impress a "free" girl U still gotta be able to have her trust that she will be able to go on vacations, shopping sprees and have luxury cars on rims and all of that ... Originally Posted by warrior13

There is a scene in the HBO miniseries, "The Corner," where a recovering junkie speaks at an NA meeting and says (and I paraphrase), "I never knew there was a whole other world outside of the corner, outside of my addiction. Well, it's there."

I am here to tell you there is no shortage of "free" women that do not expect a man to provide luxury cars on rims or shopping sprees or expensive vacations. But I am guessing you have created a narrative for yourself, to absolve yourself, where there is such a scarcity that these few free women are not worth pursuing. So sad.

Today I am going to spend an hour or so browsing for books at the Public Library. Later I will have coffee and read quietly at a local coffee shop. I'm planning to see a new art exhibit at a local museum this afternoon. A poetry reading later tonight. Tomorrow morning, much earlier than I prefer, I have a 2 hour volunteer gig at a local school. This weekend I have plans to see a locally produced play, go to a couple of art openings, another poetry reading, a university lecture on mysticism. I won't spend fifty bucks for the all of it. And no credentials are required, other than perhaps imagination and curiosity. And I can promise you that I will meet and organically engage with a minimum of 10 "free" women, and who knows where that might lead ...

I hope you eventually quit bull shitting yourself and open your eyes. There's not just a whole other world, there's many of them.

Awesome post, JohnnyYanks!