At guard.. Standing at 6'9 with mad handles... out of Michigan State... The man so beloved by many that he was given the cure to HIV.. Donald Sterling's main ninja.. ERVING MAGIC JOHNSON!
At the other guard, at 6'6.. the greatest to ever lace em up.. Out of North Carolina... 6 time NBA Champ.. A man that I witnessed drinking and smoking cigars till 2 am at Spy with Barkley and Carmen Electra the night before he torched the Rockets for 40 on a lovely Sunday afternoon... MICHAEL JORDAN!
At forward, at 6'9... the coldest white dude I ever witnessed play the game... Out of Indiana State.. The man every shooter aspires to be.. One of the greatest trash talkers of all time.. The Hick from French Lick.. LARRY BIRD!
At the other forward, at 6'8... Straight out of high school.. A man that was dubbed King before he even stepped on an NBA floor and has since backed that shit up.. The only player included on this roster who's story is not yet complete.. And the sole reason the NBA has awarded the Cavs the #1 pick 3 out of the last 4 years.. LEBRON JAMES
And at center, always listed at 7'0 but admittedly closer to 6'10... Out of The University of Houston... The all time NBA leader in blocks.. The main man on the team that caused one of the most epic street parties on Richmond after the 94-95 Championship! I mean, the strippers came out of Centerfold's and we're dancing in front of the club, show your titties for Clutch City signs popped up everywhere and drunk girls were obliging.. It was like Mardi Gras sans beads.. Being the summer after I graduated high school, it is ingrained in my memory but I digress.. A man that recently stated in an interview that if Lance Stephenson tried that ear blowing shit in his time, he probably would've caught an ol fashioned, passionate ass whoopin.. HAKEEM OLAJUWON!

Hey look! It's Mitch Kupchak!