Twilight zone ... or musings of Single Companion

sometimes its nice to fuck someone you really like as opposed to somebody you really love. just wondering Originally Posted by petiteassman

Explain please.

This could definitely be a whole new thread but here is the second question I have been asking myself. When is the right time to reveal to a man my line of work? I cannot emotionally connect with a man that I am lying to.Yet, I have made the mistake of revealing my work too soon. If I reveal my occupation to soon I attract men that just find it "intriguing".......I have come to loathe that word.Funny little story, I went out on a date with a man. Nice guy but knew we were not right for each other. We developed a friendship. I revealed to him what I do, as it happens he was very familiar with the hobby and had seen several ladies in my area. Sometimes I think its not really such a small world. Originally Posted by tylorblake

I'm all for telling the guy before he knows my real first and last name, where I live, or anything else that he could retaliate with if he were NOT cool with the fact that I'm a companion. I also think that he deserves to be told before we sleep together- incase he has any health hangups or concerns.

For this reason, I would be extra selective. As in, excluding guys who my friends set me up with (because if they didn't handle it well, they would tell mainstream friends who I don't want to know about this life).

As I was just becoming aware of this world, I met a few guys in the mainstream who had dated or married escorts and did not describe those relationships as any more dysfunctional than with other women they've dated.

I'm not looking to date, but I had one recent experience that it was accidental- we met while I was out celebrating a friends' birthday. I told him over coffee the next day, matter of factly when the conversation naturally turned to "so what do you do for work". That part was really funny ("oh I'm an escort, what do you do for work?"). "Do you like it?" "Oh I love it" "Oh that's great, I love my work too..." ... the conversation continued normally as if I'd just said I was a secretary... The next day he figured out which of the 29 chicks on STL Eros I am and we had a laugh (and talked about more interesting things than how I spend my time and make my money) ....but, as I've said, I'm not ready to date, and for that and alot of other reasons he's in the friends-zone. He still doesn't know my real last name/where I live.

I believe that there are guys out there, alot of nice guys, who are surprisingly open minded.
I have no doubt that when I'm ready to seek a healthy mainstream relationship, that I'll be able to find one with someone I can be completely honest with.

It makes no sense to me that many people think teachers make better parents (because they work around kids all the time).... but many think that escorts make worse mates (because we work around men all the time).

@ Tylor - Maybe it is a gender/role thing but I'm on much better behavior on p4p date than civie. P4p I know what I'm getting. Civie, I got to "work" for it.

@ Tylor - when to sleep with a civie date? ASAP in my view. If she isn't putting out after the 2nd or 3rd date I'm moving on. We are all adults. This isn't our first rodeo.

@ Tylor & Rachael - re: when to tell the guy you are a pro.... there are "special" guys out there that truly are "open minded" but I think they are fewer and farther between than you might like to believe. They might say they are fine with it so they can get some of that sweet nectar between your thighs but not really consider you "commitment" or "take home for the holidays" material

@ WTF - are you losing it?

as you and your date realized you were not right for each other but became friends and both were involved in hobby world did the relationship develop into casual sex. sometimes its nice to fuck someone you really like as opposed to somebody you really love. just wondering Originally Posted by petiteassman

Actually no, it has not developed into a sexual relationship and I do not see that happening with him. Unfortunately he, and I experienced this before with other men, felt so comfortable after I revealed my dark secret felt like he could bear his soul to me(like I was a therapist or something) and some of the things he disclosed were a sexual turnoff ( and god knows I am open minded.) However I do have fun with him and continue the friendship.

There is another guy that I have been seeing that I like, not love, that I enjoy spending time with, going out to dinner, dancing. It is the kind of relationship that I get the feeling that we have tons of fun together but it is really not going anywhere. He is aware of my profession and has asked very little about it. It did develop into a sexual relationship.One day I got up the nerve to ask him, "Am I sexually different than a woman not in my profession?" He response was the my oral skills were much better. Well his are much better than the average Joe so I guess its a nice fit, at least for the time being.

There is another guy that I have been seeing that I like, not love, that I enjoy spending time with, going out to dinner, dancing. It is the kind of relationship that I get the feeling that we have tons of fun together but it is really not going anywhere. Originally Posted by tylorblake

So in essence, a true friend. Someone who you could run by a question about guys (or whatever) that you couldn't ask a client or another courtesan (I still like to avoid using the term "prov!der."

Nothing wrong with having friends.

@ Tylor & Rachael - re: when to tell the guy you are a pro.... there are "special" guys out there that truly are "open minded" but I think they are fewer and farther between than you might like to believe. They might say they are fine with it so they can get some of that sweet nectar between your thighs but not really consider you "commitment" or "take home for the holidays" material Originally Posted by atlcomedy

I have to agree with you there. I think there are a few men but that they are VERY few and far between. It would take a man that was able to not just judge the exterior but see a lady for what she really is beyond her line of work....not a small task.And I don't think in all instances that its just about the sweet nectar, I think some guys might really want to be ok with it and try to be but in the end find that they are incapable of emotionally dealing with it.If I reverse the roles, frankly I do not know if I could deal with a potential date being a male escort.

When I date guys in the civie world unfortunately often there is a thought lurking in the back of my mind " Does he want to sleep with me just because he knows he will be getting for free what other men pay a grand for" For that reason, I think I need to be selective , for my own self preservation.

@ WTF - are you losing it? Originally Posted by atlcomedy

I lost Ansley, you seen her?