Need some advice

  • TX
  • 08-24-2011, 10:41 AM
Easy folks!!! No need for the tension.

Thanks everyone that contributed to the topic. I will definitaly take what has been said into consideration.
Easy folks!!! No need for the tension.

Thanks everyone that contributed to the topic. I will definitaly take what has been said into consideration. Originally Posted by TX

TX- I don't see or feel any tension. You have sparked a really interesting conversation and I think this applies to many people who want to know how to how to deal with this situation. Great topic! Please let us know how it turns out!

Speedracer - Thrank you for your great responses and well written opinions.I wonder if we'be crossed paths at some of the local clubs. You've definitely put me in a "couples mood" this week. I don't think there is only one right way to introduce her to the scene so we both very well could be right.
  • TX
  • 08-25-2011, 11:19 AM
Again thanks for the advice.

I will definitely keep you all posted.

I created an account on sdc.com and swinglifestyle

Hopefully something works out if not I guess I will have to look for a truely Bi provider



TX - I am in almost the same situation except for one major difference... I am the female in the couple. I thought I'd share my thoughts from the female perspective. My opinion is the only option for my first time is to go pro for many reasons.

First, this will be the first time I see my SO be sexual (other than stripper play) with another woman and while I fantasize about it, I don't know how I will react. I think a pro would be able to handle that better.

Second, while I am curious, i don't know that i would "reciprocate" for another woman. I don't think you'll find to many civvies that are that giving..

Third, I'm not looking to build a relationship with the person. I just want to have good, naughty sex!

We tried the swingers sites, but there are very few single ladies on there and most who are were simply not an option for me

And just a small bit of (unsolicited) advice. You said your wife doesn't know you are on eccie and you also said you set up profiles on the swingers site. Does she know you are looking a for a woman? Trust in my opinion is the number one most important thing in bringing someone in to your relationship. If your wife thinks you are being deceptive or sneeking around, she will likely change her mind about a threesome (and possibly you too) She should be a actively involved in the search for your third.

Good luck
nuglet's Avatar
TADA!!!!!!!!!!!!
You and my wife have very similar ideas/values/criterion
Sometimes ya just gotta wonder what goes through some guys minds.. and sometimes, ya can see... a medium caliber bullet.. LOL
I have not read all the responses, so i may be repeating what someone else has said. Set up a girl that you think you SO may think is hot. Get the provider to "bump" into you a club or someplace you and your SO go. You and the provider can act like nothing is up. everyone is happy.
  • TX
  • 08-31-2011, 04:46 PM
TX - I am in almost the same situation except for one major difference... I am the female in the couple. I thought I'd share my thoughts from the female perspective. My opinion is the only option for my first time is to go pro for many reasons.

First, this will be the first time I see my SO be sexual (other than stripper play) with another woman and while I fantasize about it, I don't know how I will react. I think a pro would be able to handle that better.

Second, while I am curious, i don't know that i would "reciprocate" for another woman. I don't think you'll find to many civvies that are that giving..

Third, I'm not looking to build a relationship with the person. I just want to have good, naughty sex!

We tried the swingers sites, but there are very few single ladies on there and most who are were simply not an option for me

And just a small bit of (unsolicited) advice. You said your wife doesn't know you are on eccie and you also said you set up profiles on the swingers site. Does she know you are looking a for a woman? Trust in my opinion is the number one most important thing in bringing someone in to your relationship. If your wife thinks you are being deceptive or sneeking around, she will likely change her mind about a threesome (and possibly you too) She should be a actively involved in the search for your third.

Good luck Originally Posted by MaxPower78613

Thanks for your advice!

The SO doesnt know i have seen providers (just like most other married men on here).

As for her knowing if i am looking........ yes she knows. we set up the profile and we both are actively looking online.
I have been in the Austin swing scene for a while and can tell you it is a TRUE hott sexy blast, WHEN DONE RIGHT!! There are a few clubs in Austin that might work, however, the trendiest one currently is Players of Austin located in North Austin. I would avoid all the other swinging clubs currently, as they have all changed owners recently and have not been kept up. A few of the newer websites that locals use are:

www.kasidie.com
www.sdc.com

With all this in mind, I would still have to agree with a few of the comments above, I would most deft go pro or find someone that you have no personal connection to. This being a "first" for you two together might also open a can of worms/ emotions that you might no be ready to deal with after. Therefore, by going with someone who has done this before or with someone that you do not have a personal tie to, will help in avoiding any weirdness after the experience. I have ran into many couples that have had their first 3some with friends, only to find that it has ruined their friendship after. Find a provider that you are truly comfortable with, and arrange a time that you and your wife will be out and about, where the provider breaks the ice by approaching your wife first ... Hopefully after a few cocktails and some flirting, she will break out of her shyness!

Good Luck!
ive seen several clients and the wives/gf as well ..... its tons of fun with the right lady!!
  • TX
  • 09-01-2011, 10:50 AM
thanks for the info Lulu!

if we decide to go pro i will keep all you ladies in mind!