What Becomes Of The Children?

jokacz's Avatar
cowboy8055's Avatar
Sorry Cowboy but I think that's exactly sanctimonious. How do we have the moral high ground to judge the choices of others? . Originally Posted by mwebber
I don't mean to judge other people's actions as though we are superior to them. Nobody is better than anyone else, myself included. I'm as flawed as the next guy. That doesn't mean we can't call out destructive behavior. I'm not gonna sit around and watch people I care about self destruct without saying anything. Is that sanctimonious, perhaps. But to not criticize reckless behavior because we ought not judge leads to apathy and that doesn't help anyone.
GP's Avatar
  • GP
  • 09-05-2012, 08:39 PM
Originally Posted by jokacz
Shouldn't there be an abortion Dr. Ken to go with that. Coat hanger and all. RIGHT!?@?#?@%%^?#
JONBALLS's Avatar
ive never seen barbie so radiant and glowing!
Loki Pk's Avatar
I gave up trying to save people. It CAN'T be done. People are going to do whatever in the hell they want to do. The only person who can save someone is themselves. I refuse to go through life feeling guilty all the time or having someone try and lay a guilt trip on me. It ain't gonna work. Originally Posted by GP
I couldn't agree more. !!!!
Peace
PK
SweetElizabeth's Avatar
But to get back to my original question, what happens to these kids? Are we helping to create a perpetual underclass? Are we allowing it just to satisfy our sexual cravings? For the most part their mothers never had a chance. I think they will have even less of one. Originally Posted by jokacz
My 2 cents....

I believe the thread itself is a small piece of the larger picture.

Damned scruples, anyhow!

I will share that even though I use to be pretty book smart when I was younger, I obviously lacked in judgement on not only one occasion throughout my life.
This includes today and this week.... :--)


Is abortion or adoption or having a child the right thing to do? etc etc etc etc etc

I had my first child at a very young age. I have regrets in my life that I did not provide more for my children, in every aspect, as they deserve more than I ever gave or ever could give.

I was born to a two parent home, both of whom were raised in the country, each on a small farm. Both worked lots of hours. Both loved and provided for me and my siblings the best they knew how.

Are their faults and greatnesses responsible for my decisions in life?
No.
Did they effect me? Of course!

It's a "which came first" question. The chicken or the egg?

Do I feel horrible that every day children are brought into a horrid scary world with the odds stacked against them?
Yes.
Do I think poor$$ people should not procreate? No, because I think life is for everyone.

I am a firm believer in living. Being happy. Being positive. I believe in people. I actually believe in love. Damned it!!

Would I help a woman that I know has had a difficult time with life? I have. There are also times I have refused to.

A quick thought:
If life is 5 card stud poker, do we get to take our hand to a different table?
Sometimes we do. Sometimes we don't.

"Perpetual Underclass" is quite a statement, but I think I grasp where you were heading with it......

Sometimes life gets better for the kids.

Sometimes it doesn't.

I do not believe children that come from "great" homes have it quite as good as some want to believe. They, too, have problems in life, just as the children whom you speak of.

I, and my three beautiful and awesome children didn't & don't "have much of a chance in this world." (According to many.)

Does it make me or my amazing and wonderful kids an underclass to other people?

No.

Do you know that once a hobbyist said to me: "I mean, if it weren't for the hobby, why on earth would or could I ever know you!!"

I damned well felt like saying I was the working woman at the factory you owned that didn't pay a working wage and mistreated people. Or I was the waitress that gave you coffee today! (Or something to that degree.... lol You get my drift!) BUT, I didn't. I didn't because, in my thoughts, it wasn't right to say.

I can say I am as much of a hypocrite as any other. Should I do what I do? No. Do I? yes. Has it served me well in parts of my world? Yes. Has it served me poorly? Of course.

I always bring up the "Call me daddy scenario" with providers.
Scenario: You are in a call, and he says "call me daddy"



If I take the call, will it fill his sick desire and save a young person from being gone after?

OR

If I take the call, will it only give him the courage to go after a young person?


During a tipsy Christmas tree trimming party, I brought of a point for discussion, saying: "What if this (our lives) IS hell? What if this is it??"

He responded back "What if this is heaven and it's as good as it's going to get!"
I really, really, really liked your response! Thanks Elizabeth.
Frankie Fine's Avatar
I really, really, really liked your response! Thanks Elizabeth. Originally Posted by lostforkate
Ditto!
jokacz's Avatar
Thanks SweetElizabeth, that was the kind of reply I was hoping to elicit. I was disappointed that most of the regulars didn't participate. I think it makes most of us uncomfortable.
SweetElizabeth's Avatar
Thank you.
It's a good thought provoking topic! Diverse in many ways, really. Kudos to joka!
cowboy8055's Avatar
Thanks SweetElizabeth, that was the kind of reply I was hoping to elicit. I was disappointed that most of the regulars didn't participate. I think it makes most of us uncomfortable. Originally Posted by jokacz
Most people don't like dealing with these types of topics. We don't want to deal with the complications of life. We live in a society that prefers to sweep such things under the rug. It's unfortunate.
It is an uncomfortable conversation. I know I get a little touchy on the subject. I guess I should add some context to my statements. As some know, I spend my free time working with underprivileged and disabled children in "da hood." I have seen the best and worst of humanity through the eyes of kids. The situations are never what you think, and there is always hope. You can't peg these kids for a certain life because there is a greater support system out there of teachers, social workers, clergy, and volunteers, not just parents.

To give one story. I recall one disabled kid at Christmas time. His prohibited substanced-out mother threw some chemicals in this kid's face, and he became legally blind. Well Santa came for visit to drop off presents. This kid was the happiest of the bunch to "see" Santa. He is a star student and looks to have a very bright future.

On a side note: I also work with kids at the Special Olympics. I hate seeing "____"-tard on this board. I know it's not the intention, but I feel it's a slap in the face of these kids who are inspiring and have accomplished so much.

Ugh I'm done being serious. Next thread: Do you miss your foreskin?
offshoredrilling's Avatar
at first I wanted nothing to do with this thread. reading it later, ya its good


I do not believe children that come from "great" homes have it quite as good as some want to believe. They, too, have problems in life, just as the children whom you speak of.
Originally Posted by SweetElizabeth
great post, part I quote got to me.

born in great home can be great. Or the worse thing that could of happen.

in school I was always told I will never make it in the world by teachers. One guy that teachers held up as boys should be like this boy as he will go far. The perfect kid from the perfect family. Well he is the only one that has the same job of my class(other than the pro golfer) after getting out of school. yup after getting his masters in something i forget what at a ivy college. He still makes his living pushing a shopping cart he stole from Wegman's or Topp's up and down Lake Ave living on the nickles on the road.


mmmmm I have known or known of some kids raised by providers. I will go with a set from few of ya know and never was reviewed. 4 kids, dumped by hubby went to school became a nurse. Then a provider for reason I do not to go into. 2 girls, one is a doctor, no one know what happened to the other, even mom. 2 boys, one two tours in Iraq, doing 3rd in Afghanistan now. Other smuggles stuff and lives at the southern boarder, and his pic can be seen at the post office.

So a great start can be the worse thing
A poor start can be the best thing
Lexxxy's Avatar
It is an uncomfortable conversation. I know I get a little touchy on the subject. I guess I should add some context to my statements. As some know, I spend my free time working with underprivileged and disabled children in "da hood." I have seen the best and worst of humanity through the eyes of kids. The situations are never what you think, and there is always hope. You can't peg these kids for a certain life because there is a greater support system out there of teachers, social workers, clergy, and volunteers, not just parents.

To give one story. I recall one disabled kid at Christmas time. His prohibited substanced-out mother threw some chemicals in this kid's face, and he became legally blind. Well Santa came for visit to drop off presents. This kid was the happiest of the bunch to "see" Santa. He is a star student and looks to have a very bright future.

On a side note: I also work with kids at the Special Olympics. I hate seeing "____"-tard on this board. I know it's not the intention, but I feel it's a slap in the face of these kids who are inspiring and have accomplished so much.

Ugh I'm done being serious. Next thread: Do you miss your foreskin? Originally Posted by mwebber
I was unaware of this fact but we have a lot in common. While in graduate school I had the option of being a paid teaching assistant or getting my medical certification and working hands on in the feild at a group home as a Med passer and direct care worker. I chose to work hands on with the kids. I saw and heard so much I'm tearing up thinking about it, holidays were the hardest. Now I volunteer with E.D. children. I have them decorate nursing homes for holidays, volunteer at the spca working with the animals, do yard clean ups for old people, do park clean ups with starbucks, we painted a fence at a park this summer... the stories, scars, parents, living conditions.... would make anyone cry if they heard or saw. Just like you I have witnessed amazing things where kids have fought against the odds and made something of themselves especially the kids I still keep in contact with from the group home. The dark underside is I have seen more kids chose the paths of drug dealer parents, gang banging siblings, school drop outs, become molesters because it was done to them, pop out kids really young like their parents did and sit on welfare too, and so on. I hate to say it but these children are like playing a slot machine. You do win here and there, sometimes you even get a huge win, and sadly you mostly lose .
JONBALLS's Avatar
I started an orphanage in the east andies