Introspective discussion about ourselves from within the hobby

I do not mean to come of as flippant Originally Posted by WTF

Did WTF get his laptop stolen again? He would never make such a remark.

Becky, I would much rather have you study me than WTF!!! Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

Charles I'm trading you to Becky for some gummy bears..... Originally Posted by WTF

Good I am glad we got that sorted out

As far as the question that started the thread goes.......................... ............. Oh no I have no idea what the question was , but all of that overthinking has made my head hurt.

Very very few women are so hypersexualized they find every man attractive. Fewer than 1% suffer from "nymphomania" and maybe another 1% might be hypersexual during the manic phase of bipolar. The other 98% really do not feel a compelling urge to lay any man on two legs. The ads where the girl says "I'm so horny" ring hollow. I'm sure there are exceptions -- but darned few.

Men are designed to find most women at least somewhat attractive. Women are designed to only find a few men attractive -- and which men they actually find attractive is a pretty complex situation.

Obviously, a woman would WANT to have sex with a man she found attractive. But others? No. She really doesn't.

I find it interesting reading reviews about all these orgasms that hobbyists give providers. Yet brain scan studies of women receiving oral sex from their committed partners reveals that a number of prerequisites generally not present in the hobby -- especially trust and a sense of safety -- are necessary for a woman to achieve orgasm. Am I supposed to believe that a provider is a special breed of woman whose brain works differently?

My aim, when I see providers in many respects can be encapsulated as making it as pleasant as possible for her. Because the odds of it actually being pleasurable just in terms of sex are damned slim.

I DO believe that there exist providers who DO take pleasure in the PROCESS, however. In a sense of effectiveness and a job well-done.

And this is one place where we definitely agree. Outside of the most serious of infractions, I never complain about a provider or give her any crap. Laying me CAN'T be easy. No, I'm not old and ugly or something. But odds of her finding me attractive enough that she actually WANTS to lay me are pretty long. Maybe 1 in 8 at best. So by laying me *at all* she is doing what, for her, might be like laying Rosie O'Donnell would be like for me. The fact she can do it at all is a miracle of mind over body.

It is horrible when I hear about ladies being harmed or demeaned.

I booked a provider once and when I arrived, she had a flinch response. I paid her but didn't go through with the appointment except for sitting and talking. I'm not stupid -- I know what causes a flinch response. MY job, that day, was simply to be a nice and kind man. Just like her, I have a right to say "no" too.

I got laid tonight. Great gal. We even had dinner.

I made sure that her route home would not get caught up in Freaknik 2010 traffic.

I feel like quite the gentleman.

Am I missing something?

[Quote:
Yet, I have always been deeply concerned about issues of consent in dealing with providers.

Let me construe my concern this way.

Pretend I'm alone in a room with a woman. I ask her for sex and she says "no." I then pull an object out of my pocket. She looks at the object and then says "yes."

Is there a difference as to the validity of consent depending on whether the object is a gun or $1k?] Quote

You guys beat me to it, I tired to edit but mistakenly deleted the post, this post only my personal observation and not intended to offend anyone.

I don't intend to offend anyone either; nor do I intend to imply that providers are all a bunch of victims.

What I AM implying is that laying me ain't an easy job. The fact that lady makes it LOOK easy is a testament to her skill.

:-)

I don't intend to offend anyone either; nor do I intend to imply that providers are all a bunch of victims.

What I AM implying is that laying me ain't an easy job. The fact that lady makes it LOOK easy is a testament to her skill.

And she deserves to be treated with kindness and respect.

:-) Originally Posted by Laurentius

We pay a handsome price for it.

(In nearly all cases) We do treat our companions with respect.

Maybe you should do your research on street walkers if you want to find victims.

I don't intend to offend anyone either; nor do I intend to imply that providers are all a bunch of victims.

What I AM implying is that laying me ain't an easy job. The fact that lady makes it LOOK easy is a testament to her skill.

And she deserves to be treated with kindness and respect.

:-) Originally Posted by Laurentius

No offence taken It is usually the media , or public opinion that I think of when it comes to being assigned the victim label.It sounds like you are being very hard on yourself.If you are enjoying her company then chances are she is also enjoying yours.Just like you, we tend to feel good when we know that we are with someone who is happy to be there.

We pay a handsome price for it.

(In nearly all cases) We do treat our companions with respect.

Maybe you should do your research on street walkers if you want to find victims. Originally Posted by atlcomedy

I realize that when I am paying a lady more for an hour of her time than the average guy earns in a week, she's being well-compensated. And so far, in 3.5 years of hobbying, I have had 90%+ excellent experiences.

And, yes, I DO realize most hobbyists treat companions with respect and vice versa.

However, having personally encountered providers who felt it was "part of their job" to tolerate abusive or demeaning behavior -- and not street walkers either -- I am not prepared to say that zero victims exist. Hopefully far fewer, though.

I'm not doing hobby research. Unless you count fooling around on boards and having sessions with providers as research! If it IS research, it's some of the most enjoyable research I've ever done!

;-)

Very very few women are so hypersexualized they find every man attractive. Fewer than 1% suffer from "nymphomania" and maybe another 1% might be hypersexual during the manic phase of bipolar. The other 98% really do not feel a compelling urge to lay any man on two legs. Originally Posted by Laurentius

Can't one be highly sexual without being diagnosed with a mental disorder? This goes back to the idea that there's something wrong with highly sexual women.

No one said anything about having to be attracted to every man or any man. It may be shocking to hear, but we actually have standards. Granted where we draw the line varies on the woman, but that's not to say we agree to put our selves into situations we find sexually degrading. We have the power to say no, and we exercise it. Even more economically attainable companion's aren't necessarily high volume and won't necessarily settle.

Men are designed to find most women at least somewhat attractive. Women are designed to only find a few men attractive -- and which men they actually find attractive is a pretty complex situation.

This is so painfully stereotypical it's almost a cartoon caricature of the male sex. Why must men be presented as having low standards? It is true that there are individuals of both sexes that probably leave much wanting, but most people have some sort of personal pride and sense of self respect.

Obviously, a woman would WANT to have sex with a man she found attractive. But others? No. She really doesn't.

Amongst ourselves women don't have this need to posture, and yet even when it's only ladies talking to ladies - they cross into the subject of their orgasms. It does happen, it actually has a lot to do with her sexual nature. Some women cum easily often, with nearly any sex partner, others need an emotional involvement, still others just have a physiology that makes orgasm work, but attainable. Some just don't. Some choose not to.

especially trust and a sense of safety -- are necessary for a woman to achieve orgasm. Am I supposed to believe that a provider is a special breed of woman whose brain works differently?

Really? You don't think women are capable of having a roaring orgasm on a one night stand?

As you mention, our brains do in fact work differently. Which means, that while guys have a greater tendency to chase their personal version of eye candy, I find women often become attracted to a man's looks after falling for his spirit. Meaning in the world of sexual tension: she may not notice you at first, but if you can catch her attention when you speak - you can stand the chance of making her lust you. Which means that he doesn't have to be a GQ model for me to be completely turned on by him, find him attractive and have a good time.

A good male friend of mine once said: "Women have the incredible ability to find their man attractive. Guys are either attracted or not, they don't grow into a physical attraction in the same way." I think this is true.

I'm not saying it's a perfect world, that there aren't unhappy women or women who aren't interested but like the income. However, I do think you paint too grim a picture with too broad a stroke. Those who enter the profession eagerly are not as rare as you might think, and that's becoming increasingly true as time passes. Far too cynical - such things become a self fulfilling prophesy. Half the challenge is being comfortable and sincere enough that you inspire the same feelings in her.

Did WTF get his laptop stolen again? He would never make such a remark. Originally Posted by Rudyard K

To tell the truth I was feeling somewhat flippant when I wrote that.

but all of that overthinking has made my head hurt. Originally Posted by Becky

Mine too......I'll rub your aching head if you'll rub mine
















ps. All the women who are lucky enough to be chosen by me come at least three time per encounter...four times on holidays, five times on the upcoming Easter holiday (it makes hunting for eggs so much more enjoyable).

Mine too......I'll rub your aching head if you'll rub mine Originally Posted by WTF

Don't fall this this scam Becky -- you know which head he means.

Don't fall this this scam Becky -- you know which head he means. Originally Posted by pjorourke

And he needs to see a doctor.

And he needs to see a doctor. Originally Posted by Marcus Aurelius

I have already cleared that lil problem up.





Becky, PJ has no idea what he is talking about...my lil head does not need rubbing. It does need Mouth-to-Mouth Resuscitation though.