Your definition please: Hobby Hubby?

I'm not sure if it's the fact that I've never been married (or close to it) or that I'm still young (although...damn...I'm sure not as young as I once was) but the term hobby husband makes me gag. And I have a strong sense that if I were to use that term to describe the men that I've become closest to through hobbying that I'd be scaring them away (although that could simply be a fear). So I don't really have anything to add to the discussion of defining the term.

BUT the reason I piped-up was to thank Space and a few others for valuing providers as women and women as people. When hobbyists speak their opinions on how we providers are good fuck-material but bad marriage-material, it's disrespectful. And marginalizing. And objectifying. So I embrace my high sex drive and openness about sex, what of it? I found out at a young(er) age that I could get paid to find sexually interesting, respectful, and attractive men. Some men applaud me for embracing my inner capitalist and tending to my inner slut and I like those men. Oh, and for the record...those men are much, much better lovers. And for the men who don't value the women that they are paying for sex, I sure hope you save a bit of your cash for traditional therapy.

What she said...as always, so eloquently!

What she said...as always, so eloquently! Originally Posted by Aphrodite

+1 JennsLolli does it again

After reading this truly scintillating thread I must ask the OP, have you now formed a definition of Hobby Hubby?

I was surprised to see this topic, heretofore I know of only one lady who uses the term. However I think it is like the fabled term GFE, it is indefinable and means something different to each who uses it.

But I am curious as to how the ladies define it. And would you tell your Hobby Hubby he is your hobby hubby?

As for those who think that the ladies here are solely for satisfying physical needs, to each his own, but after meeting so many truly wonderful ladies, I feel that you are missing out on the best part of these women. They are so much more than athletic gymnastics or kinky abbreviations. In most of my visits the physical part of the program is not the best part of the visit. I have been truly fortunate in meeting women who are smart, caring, creative, witty, funny and imaginative. And that's in addition to their physical gifts.

Curious Guy: I couldn't agree more.

I swear I don't understand how ppl make those type of comments here and still get seen. Originally Posted by NikkiWhite

In all of my years of hobbying my ability to book with a beautiful petite exotic woman has never once been a problem. That is all I book with.

Every provider I've ever booked has very much enjoyed my company as I have enjoyed theirs. Several have offered to hang out afterward off the clock. As magical as the moment is I would never be so foolish as to get involved on a personal level.
Not so much because of the previously described superficial reasons as because I have no interest in the drama that comes with the territory when mixing worlds.

I suppose I'm just selective about who I fuck or pursue relationships with. You wouldn't know of course as I've never once shown interest in the self proclaimed queen of kegels. The ones I book have the look, the curves and the allure. They don't need to advertise a parlor trick.

He doesn't get seen, he just Trolls He's a special desperate type that hangs on hooker boards, but doesn't hobby! Truly pathetic!!!!!! Originally Posted by Locomotive

Actually you have no clue as to who I actually see or don't. I simply no longer review or incriminate myself in open forums. It is interesting being labeled a troll by someone who has been banned more times than I have posted.

I'm too young and new to understand this concept of a "hobby Husband" but it really just sounds like when two people have a really close comfortable relationship.

I Miss my High School "wife" I miss a lot of things holding hands, flirting, pictures, hugging man I really miss hugs...I miss being married more then I miss having a boyfriend.

After reading through some of this thread, I find that I really don't have a good idea at all of what a hobby husband is. If it is just a "hubby" you met in the hobby, does that mean you two argue a lot and never have sex?

Anyway, to put in my meager thoughts, I don't think that I would ever consider a provider for a serious relationship. I'm not comfortable with her line of work (from an emotional investment point), but I also don't feel like I have the right to tell anyone "quit your job - I don't like it". So, if she chooses not to quit, I'm stuck.

At the same point, though, I don't think it would be wise for a provider to have a serious relationship with one of us man-whores. Not because of our "job", but because of our habit (seeing providers). You could "hope" we'd quit, but would have to turn into a stalker to verify it.

Some people may have no problem with open relationships, and if so, that's cool, and something like this might work...I can't do it, though. If I'm in a relationship, I need it to be exclusive. I don't hobby when in a relationship (maybe different than other guys here, but I don't judge - live and let live), and would expect her not a be sleeping around either (compensated or strictly recreational doesn't matter).

Maybe this really comes down to "ignorance is bliss". If I met a provider, but didn't know what she did, and she quit right after we started getting involved, obviously I wouldn't know/care. If she told me her job and did not quit, I would respect her honesty and remove myself from the relationship. If she chose to hide it (which would probably be unwise, as I think it would eventually come out) and I found out later, I would put it in the same mental category as any other cheating, and be pretty pissed off/hurt.

So, it isn't really the job, I think (or the male version, the hobby)...it is just all in how you treat the other person, and how they treat you. Long winded, I know...I probably could have made that shorter, but meh...characters are cheap...

Space

I have to agree with you. How do you really know? I know a provider on.this board who I meet threw friends and she is a gorgeous woman and has the RW appearance of a mom who works hard to provide for her son and all the while seems like the gal most want to be with. I know what she does now but didnt at the time meet, I still consider her someone I would date. I am single so hobbying for me is that exactly what Space said I am paying them to go away. Until I meet someone that I want a commited relationship with will continue to hobby. I thought had meet someone before new year but O was wrongabout her. So as for topic Hobby Huaband is someone you spend time with and can talk about life with to.me.

So where does this put the dear old wife who's solidly behind her man even though he's popping his cork somewhere else. Is it not true that you ladies may well have numerous hobby husbands, and perhaps just one amongst those that could claim to be the ultimate ATF ?
So if the guy is having a great time with his favorite mistress, where does this leave the poor wife. Does she become the hobby housekeeper, and wouldn't she suspect that her sex life has suddenly dried up and is just fed a tiny morsel of plain vanilla legover? In reality he's become the part time husband to her.
I've always wondered if one day the hubby comes home to find his dear wife has transformed into a raging sex pot and greets him at the door totally naked, with a cache of toys and ready to rip his clothes off. Perhaps at the eleventh hour she realizes she's got competition. How would that affect the hobby husband / sex vixen relationship, if at all. I've really wanted to create a thread about such a topic. This hobby in many respects is outta control. But I'm afraid it's like the runaway train. It can't be stopped. Because we men love delicious adventure and we don't relate to plain vanilla sex at home. We love an extended menu
Or can it? Let me know. I'm just one of those insatiable curiosity seekers highlighted by Aphrodite.

So where does this put the dear old wife who's solidly behind her man even though he's popping his cork somewhere else. Originally Posted by DA_Tyler

I think that you bring-up a very valid point. I developed a bit of a kink for bedding attached men in my early 20s after I accidentally fell for an attached man. It was kinky being the other woman, but the older I get, the more that my kink fades. The moral argument I use to combat any guilt is that I never actively seek out attached men. The married boys on here are around to fuck anyone, if it's not me it'll be someone else. That being said, I'm now at the point in my life where I'm almost ready to consider a serious long term relationship. And friends of mine are getting married and having babies and figuring out that their husbands have a roving eye and it breaks my heart for them.

I have a feeling that I'll hang-up my provider hat for good at some point in the next two years, and if it's not because of my general paranoia about safety and legal issues, it'll absolutely be about my mistress guilt. The more I feel obliged to settle into the wife role, the more guilt I'll feel over being the anti-wife for 10+ years.

Sigh.

u CaN't TuRn HoUsE wIfE iN 2 hOoKeR & a HoOkEr CaN't TuRn In 2 HoUsE wIfE

If it is just a "hubby" you met in the hobby, does that mean you two argue a lot and never have sex? Originally Posted by Luvdatpuddy

I literally LOL'd at that!

My two cents. I was first married to an upper crust society girl, It lasted 7 months. After learning the ways of the world and having an "in" in many Dallas topless bars I dated several dancers for over a year. Then I married one. That was 17 years ago. Kids are doing great in school, everything is a normal as can be. I have meet some great people here. Good people are good people, weather Doctor, lawyer, cop, or provider. Any hobbiest who sees providers while thinking they are some lower form of life is a POS hyprocrite. My hat is off to you girls. HR64

u CaN't TuRn HoUsE wIfE iN 2 hOoKeR & a HoOkEr CaN't TuRn In 2 HoUsE wIfE Originally Posted by bRyAnDaViS

what da fuq.

I beg to differ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xh_wsmEglw0