Where are the Classy Girls? Also, Tips for Gentlemen

SknyDiva's Avatar
I think like a man often.....hahaHa hahaha!
Well said .
Old-T's Avatar
  • Old-T
  • 06-15-2015, 09:06 AM
I think like a man often.....haha

But I enjoy throwing in my 2 cents anyways Old-T Originally Posted by Luvs2Purrr
And thank you for doing so! Those two cents add up, and isn't that what a forum is supposed to be? Different ideas, exchanged politely?

We are getting confused here and wrapped up in trappings. The definition of a gentleman comes down to one thing and one thing only - it's how you treat the ladies. It makes no difference whatsoever how many suits you own, how expensive they are, how well they fit or how you tip the waiter or chef (though that may be revealing). It's how much respect and kindness you show the ladies. I repeat, it's how much respect and kindness you show the ladies. This is not real life but it has many things in common with real life. And chief and foremost is to treat others like you would wish to be treated. Yep, the Golden Rule applies, even here. Do a serious job on your research and this should not be an issue. There are some ladies that deserve your respect and some that don't. See the ones that do. This is not rocket science or brain surgery. Originally Posted by watchoutthegameisrigged
I always enjoy your comments whether I agree with them or not. In this case I think we might be confusing two terms that both have positive connotations, but are not the same.

What you describe is being a kind, respectful date. Basically a good person. If a lady were to itemize all the traits she wants in a date, you have captured what I suspect most would put atthe very top of their list.

However, I do not thing that is exactly what TG was referring to (and I am certain he will correct me if I am wrong). As he is using the term, "gentleman" has a different connotation--one that DOES include the trappings. There is nothing wrong with that, and I would expect his use of the term ASSUMES what you are referring to, but wrapped in a different outer shell.

Someone can have all the trimmings and glitter and clothes and NOT be a gentleman because inside they are filled with disrespect and selfishness. But the traits of respect, kindness, consideration are also not sufficient to be categorized as a gentleman as TG is using the term.

I had an uncle who was a carpenter. Finished HS and that was all because the family needed him to start work as an apprentice (his father had died and there were 8 kids). I do not think he ever owned more than one suit in his life, and only wore that for weddings and funerals. Other than serving in WW-II he never left the neighborhood he was born in as far as I know. But he had every positive trait in a human being you would want. No one would call him a gentleman, and he would be embarrased if you did. But everyone was glad to call him friend.

I think you and TG are both describing positive treatment of a lady while seeing her. You are correct that he may focus more on some of the trimmings, but I think underneath the two of you are not fundamentally contradictory--just different.

Now the two of you can resume shooting at me for misrepresenting both of you!
Different ideas, exchanged politely? Originally Posted by Old-T
Should be, YES!

We cum here to meet the opposite sex, or same sex for some, to engage in some extra curricular activities. Who wants to visit with someone who is rude or disrespectful? NOT I.:give-up: I'm sure not many LADIES would either.


Those that enjoy being rude....
"I think you and TG are both describing positive treatment of a lady while seeing her. You are correct that he may focus more on some of the trimmings, but I think underneath the two of you are not fundamentally contradictory--just different."

You are likely correct - and any man here who approaches ladies here with that attitude is fine by me. Just different styles. It's what makes the world go round.
5T3V3's Avatar
  • 5T3V3
  • 06-15-2015, 11:49 AM
We are getting confused here and wrapped up in trappings. The definition of a gentleman comes down to one thing and one thing only - it's how you treat the ladies. It makes no difference whatsoever how many suits you own, how expensive they are, how well they fit or how you tip the waiter or chef (though that may be revealing). It's how much respect and kindness you show the ladies. I repeat, it's how much respect and kindness you show the ladies. Originally Posted by watchoutthegameisrigged
The problem is you are trying to redefine something that has already been defined. Or, you are confusing the term gentleman with that of a gentle man.

It is not how he treats the ladies, but how he treats everyone. Anyone can be a gentle man, but very few can be a gentleman. The suit is an important symbol of the gentleman. Any gentle man can run to any store and buy a suit and tie, but a gentleman takes the further step to take that store bought suit to a tailor and for an additional $20 to $100 have it altered to fit him exactly. Or perhaps he goes strait to the tailor and has the suit custom made. It is that extra step of refinement that makes a gentle man into a gentleman. A gentle man tips because tipping is a social norm and it is expected of him. A gentleman tips because he has received exemplary service and wishes to reward that service. And he is willing to go to great lengths to insure that his compliment reaches the actual provider of said service. A gentleman is an honorable man and tries to live up to those high principles. When you lose a game, it's honorable to shake hands. If you smash into someone's parked car, it's honorable to leave a note so they can contact you. A gentleman is a man of wealth and leisure by definition a gentle man is not. If we were in England, you would need to be of noble birth or titled to be called a gentleman. A gentle man is any kind hearted sot.

If I were to try to explain to you Knighthood - I might say he is a chivalrous man of noble birth, with a horse, a lance and a suit of armor well trained in the arts of war. The point is the trappings as you so eloquently put it, are part of the definition, because a man with a horse could be a knight or he might just be a cowboy - it is hard to tell without the trappings.

I would put it this way for you - the guys of Duck Dynasty might be gentle men, but they most certainly are not gentlemen. Specific words have specific meanings, they are well defined and not subject easily to change - gentleman is one of those words. I refer you to Webster if you wish to redefine the term.
"A gentleman is a man of wealth and leisure by definition a gentle man is not. If we were in England, you would need to be of noble birth or titled to be called a gentleman. A gentle man is any kind hearted sot."

Thank you for straightening that out for me. I have labored for years under the delusion that I was a gentleman. I now see that I was disqualified at birth.
Maybe the word "upscale" or "classy" has different meanings to different people.


If you grew up with a silver spoon in your mouth a trip to the Coast to water-ski is probably not anything you'd jump at, you're looking more into...say....Paris.

If you played football and were popular, dated the head cheerleader, prom queen, drove the best car ect...then as an adult you can call out "new money" pretty easily.

Same with providers. A girl who maybe grew up eating at the local Burger King and attending a small town highschool dance wearing "her best dress" which just so happened to be purchased at a Wal-Mart will faint at the thought of being treated out to Filet Mignon in Vegas while sporting a Valentino with matching Jimmy Choos...

I suppose what I'm saying is that it's not just a "hooker getting a computer" that makes them go from trashy to classy in THEIR own mind, but it's the way they look at "fancy" and/or "pricey", "classy" and "upscale" compared to how you see those things. A woman who was once a streetwalker will feel like a Queen renting a room with free breakfast at a Marriot, while a courtesan whom began the hobby lingerie modeling for an agency (me), will probably not bat an eyelash at anything more refined than what I myself cannot afford as I have seen just how much income I can generate doing things the way I was taught by other more experienced providers and madams. The street hooker will write "upscale" if that's how she feels about the service she is providing you bc that is what is "upscale" to her. That might not be even close to something you would consider "eclectic."

Background. Experience. Addict*ons. Socio-economic differences in their upbringing. All of it affects the way we see the World and it's pleasures or lack of individually. Just my lil opinion of course.

Madame X's Avatar
These kinds of conversation are always so interesting, from an anthropological point of view. This concept of cultural belonging is one that always escaped me, and combine that with the inevitable train wreck type spectacle while people try to validate themselves... I guess I just like to gawk.

Pass the popcorn, please!
TravelingGentleman's Avatar
[I]

I think you and TG are both describing positive treatment of a lady while seeing her. You are correct that he may focus more on some of the trimmings, but I think underneath the two of you are not fundamentally contradictory--just different.
Originally Posted by Old-T
No, you're spot on.

You can be a good man without being a gentleman.
You cannot be a gentleman without being a good man.
Being a good man does not make you a gentleman.
Being a gentleman makes you a good man.

All four of those statements are true. Goodness, kindness, and manners are requirements of being both a good man and a gentleman, and all that is required to be a good man. My second post in this thread, which was "What a Gentleman is" revolves around clarifying that "Good Man" and "Gentleman" are not interchangeable because "Gentleman" is a pre-defined word, and not for this community to steal and redefine.

"A gentleman is a man of wealth and leisure by definition a gentle man is not. If we were in England, you would need to be of noble birth or titled to be called a gentleman. A gentle man is any kind hearted sot."

Thank you for straightening that out for me. I have labored for years under the delusion that I was a gentleman. I now see that I was disqualified at birth. Originally Posted by watchoutthegameisrigged
Re-read the the second post in this thread...in which I defined a gentleman - and where I clearly said...
As a follow-up post, I see the word "gentleman" abused to describe just about every male entry into the species homo sapien. I hereby reclaim the word to it's secondary definition, of a civilized, educated, sensitive man that is well-mannered: Gentleman. I'll pass on the actual definition, which had/has to do with English gentry and medieval aristocracy. Originally Posted by TravelingGentleman
<insert polite rebuke>: Education, literacy, and a thirst for knowledge *are* requirements of a gentleman, and that is why you are not....not because you weren't born into medieval English gentry...but there is nothing stopping you from being a good guy.
Where are all the high class girls?

I saw and read the thread, "Where are all the high class gents" and was motivated to write this in response. I'm obviously new to ECCIE - I didn't know it existed until a few days ago, so I've been browsing - and this is my first post - even before an introductions thread. We'll see how quickly I get chased out of here for my opinions.

Classy gentlemen want classy girls. For my time spent surfing around the incredible number of providers who describe themselves as "elegant" or "upscale" or who are looking for upscale gentlemen, I haven't seen much to recommend...not that shopping in this proverbial store would do me any good because no one is newbie friendly. Even the advertised newbie friendly ones want references....Except I'd say that by definition, "Classy" means that a gentleman isn't surfing around providers, they are looking for (for lack of a better word) a mistress.

Being upscale or high class is the complete antithesis of having a laundry list of provider references. Are you a a classy girl? Do you have a high opinion of your worth? Then you should be willing to let a gentleman buy you dinner and drinks while compensating you for your time, SOLELY for the pleasure of your wit, your companionship, and your ability to make him feel wanted, without asking for a list of prostitutes that he's slept with. Because if he has one to give you, he's a john, not a gentleman.

That's right. A classy girl's value is not between her legs. It's between her ears. It's her ability to make a man feel special, and wanted by someone whom he finds desirable.

So, where are all the classy girls? I'd say these are the pretty bare-bones requirements:

-A graduate degree isn't required, but I daresay that literacy is. High-school level graduate ability to read, write, and construct a coherent sentence.
-Some basic understanding of current events, and a desire to explore and learn about the things their companion is interested in to enhance conversation.
-An understanding of what a social chameleon is, and how to be one. If you're attending a dinner party, you don't wear a hooker outfit. If the table is discussing subprime interest rates, you don't chime in to talk about your cat.
-The ability to role-play, and enough social grace to be able to pass the barest of scrutiny during introductions. Today your name might be Rebecca from Marketing. Tomorrow,you're Becky from GS - consulting on a merger with me. Why? Because personal companions don't belong at these functions, but I want to WANT you there anyway just to be in the presence of an intoxicatingly beautiful woman.
-Your pictures. Good grief. I'm tired of looking at provider pictures showing pictures of their buttocks, breasts, and legs. If you don't have a professionally taken picture of yourself wearing something elegant that I want to see attached on my arm at a social function, you're not it.
-Willingness to be a travel companion.
-Reasonable expectations for *being* a travel companion. If I want to fly you ($500) to a port to take you on a 7-day all expenses paid cruise in the Caribbean ($1500 for a balcony suite), and your rate is $500/hr...as much as the plane ticket...without some reasonable expectations, that's an $84,000 tab for your companionship. Um...nope. There's an endless list of women who would love to have an all-expenses paid trip to somewhere - ANYWHERE - and would ask for no compensation in return. Intimacy certainly isn't going to be part of the package, but a friendship certainly would be. Think about what the difference is worth.
-Likewise for business trips. If I'm flying somewhere on business, and want to bring a companion to hang out with after a day of meetings....reasonable expectations.
-Did I mention pictures? Why does everyone block out their faces? A classy girl understands that 75-90% of their time with a gentleman is fully clothed, and whether she's pleasant to look at during conversation is probably the biggest deciding factor for whether they're a potential companion.

Copyright in the U.S. has spun out of control over the last decade because IP holders have decided that they should be able to patent "XYZ....on the internet." Just because someone figured out how to do something on a computer doesn't make it new or different...or patentable, as appeals courts and the SCOTUS are beginning to affirm.

Likewise, just because a hooker gets a computer doesn't make her new or different. Advertising that you're upscale or elegant doesn't MAKE you so, especially when your profiles, pictures, and websites point to your ideal hotel being payable by the hour. Originally Posted by TravelingGentleman
Well said TravelingGentleman. The class of girls in this business has definitely changed and women don't know how to be women anymore or hold a decent conversation without checking their phones for the latest post or update if their lives depended on it. And God forbid you call them a "whore", they clutch their pearls like it could never be them (yet they're selling p*ssy *sigh*). Duck + Duck = Duck. If you want to be a whore, be a damn good one. Yet, I digress...

Classy whores still exist but you're liable to find them where you least expect them. I definitely don't believe Eccie supplies many because you can tell in the attitude of male members here.

That being said, TravelingGentleman, you can take this classy whore out for dinner any time you want.

Thanks for your post.

S
Disregarding the primary definition of being born a noble. I find that the subsequent definitions are really quite subjective. However, I am starting to understand where TG is coming from. It maybe more about what's socially acceptable. It seems as if having high standards of proper behavior in any environment, coupled with the proper apparel and education, would classify one as being a gentleman. With ECCIE being a P4P (pay for play) site, the rudimentary, socially accepted form of gentleman gets lost in all the rigmarole. I see TG wants to get back to the "heart" of what's indicative of being a classy and upscale lady and/or gent.
TravelingGentleman's Avatar
I see TG wants to get back to the "heart" of what's indicative of being a classy and upscale lady and/or gent. Originally Posted by DarkeyKong
Thanks Darkey.

I want people to remember what a lady and a gentleman are, and aspire to conduct themselves as such - or to remember what a lady and a gentleman are, and use the words appropriately.

I'm searching for an elegant lady to spend some of my leisure time with from time to time - and as I hunt through what's available out there, I see many, many, MANY, M.A.N.Y mislabeled ads.

*laughing* Unfortunately, I don't have enough credibility for anyone who might fit that category to return my calls (well, e-mails and PMs) in which I introduce myself. The sole reference I have is a very credible one, but I don't have a slew of them sitting around.
A referral from the lady you reviewed should be enough for any provider. I must admit you surprised me. I'm guilty of jumping to conclusions about what you meant by class.
Guest072015-2's Avatar
Thanks Darkey.

I want people to remember what a lady and a gentleman are, and aspire to conduct themselves as such - or to remember what a lady and a gentleman are, and use the words appropriately.

I'm searching for an elegant lady to spend some of my leisure time with from time to time - and as I hunt through what's available out there, I see many, many, MANY, M.A.N.Y mislabeled ads.

*laughing* Unfortunately, I don't have enough credibility for anyone who might fit that category to return my calls (well, e-mails and PMs) in which I introduce myself. The sole reference I have is a very credible one, but I don't have a slew of them sitting around. Originally Posted by TravelingGentleman
Have you tried KandiceLux? She's in HOU and *might* be what you're looking for although I don't know her personally so can't confirm that. Or Eve Henessey?