In a Serious Relationship With an ASP? Guys, Could You Handle It?

Sorry, I only look like George Clooney Originally Posted by buzzworm86

Then then session is free. When, Where, what time?

Please do not misunderstand what I am trying to get across...I am not saying anyone is "wrong" in their decisions. I simply don't get the explinations most people give when they try and explain open relationships to me. Everyone in an open relationship always says, "It's not about sex" when they are having sex with everyone. That's what I don't get. If it's NOT about sex, why must both parties demand it from other people? If one day he up and says, "Look I don't want to do this anymore" is the girl going to leave? I would think the couple that is married and faithful for 50 years who are NOT having sex, are the ones who have a relationship NOT based on sex.

I have many friends in these types of relationships, but they are also realists. They never use this same explination to define it.

BTW Buzz, trying to "prove" God exists is about as moot as trying to get your point across on Eccie when you're not logged in. You can't prove faith with science or explination. The very definition of faith is the evidence of things NOT SEEN. Originally Posted by London Rayne

Yes I understand,I would never argue the existence of god with anyone. I just don't think the bible is the ultimate authority on what love is. Honestly, I only have use for the the Gospels, ( first 4 books of the NT). The rest of it is probably so influenced by men that it is indistinguishable from the original texts. But if someone is able to find comfort in this book I am happy for them. My 20+ years of church I was only hurt there. I would love for there to be a new thread about the issue of reconciling a persons sexuality and Christianity. In my church any type of sex except maital was bad, bad, bad. Even masturbation. How does a 15y/old boy deal with this. He has a raging beast in his pants and he is bad if he trys to calm it?

I know my post has swayed off topic, sorry.

Your point is well taken by me, as I posted before.

Then then session is free. When, Where, what time? Originally Posted by Naomi4u

Ok great! does this mean GC with an extra 50 pounds? LWayOL

Society dictates most of our morals. Some just choose to ignore them.
Your 'innate, human sense' of right and wrong was a direct influence of what you've been taught. Originally Posted by Shayla

That is your opinion.* Just because society "dictates" what they believe is "moral"... does not mean I have to agree!* Quite obviously, you must consider yourself to be an immoral person, or else we would not be discussing this here, on an escort message board.* If you are okay with that... that is fine for you... but not for me.* We obviously have different definitions of what a moral is.* Nowhere, does Webster infer society as judge.

I believe you are wrong about what is "innate "... perhaps you should break out the dictionary on that one.* I believe I was "born!" with a free will to decide for myself, what is right and what is wrong... as long as my actions do not violate or harm another's ability to make their own decisions for themselves.* I agree... I was probably taught that.* It is my decision, whether to follow those teachings... or not.

The Golden Rule of Reciprocity is the only True Law I attempt to obey.* I am human... I am not perfect.* I do not believe society has the ability to "make " me perfect!* "They " are not perfect!

Hello! I hope everybody is doing fantastic today.
My question pertains to the guys here. Guys, would you be able to handle a serious relationship with an ASP? Why or why not? Would it bother you to know that your significant other was in this line of work? Originally Posted by Naughty Destiny

Based on the original question,

I have exchanged threads with several people who have relationships outside their marriage and claim that their SO approves on the grounds that the SO does not enjoy sex as much as the other.
This strikes me as a real possibility. My wife does not enjoy sex.

Plenty of couples enjoy swinging together and separately. What really is the difference?

I don't know our opposing moralities need to enter the conversation.
Isn't it just a life style choice.

Just because you do not like my choice does not make my choice wrong.

That is your opinion.* Just because society "dictates" what they believe is "moral"... does not mean I have to agree!* Quite obviously, you must consider yourself to be an immoral person, or else we would not be discussing this here, on an escort message board.* If you are okay with that... that is fine for you... but not for me.* We obviously have different definitions of what a moral is.* Nowhere, does Webster infer society as judge.

I believe you are wrong about what is "innate "... perhaps you should break out the dictionary on that one.* I believe I was "born!" with a free will to decide for myself, what is right and what is wrong... as long as my actions do not violate or harm another's ability to make their own decisions for themselves.* I agree... I was probably taught that.* It is my decision, whether to follow those teachings... or not.

The Golden Rule of Reciprocity is the only True Law I attempt to obey.* I am human... I am not perfect.* I do not believe society has the ability to "make " me perfect!* "They " are not perfect! Originally Posted by MrGiz

LOL. You're not getting it. That's ok. I agree to disagree.

Interesting question and many interesting answers on both sides of the issue. The problem I think we all have is that one never knows when love is going to happen and with who. When one is attracted to someone, for whatever reason, feelings do develop and relationships do form.

Just because a woman is a provider does not mean she can not be attracted to and love someone who is a hobbyist. It does happen sometimes. But both parties have to know what they want out of such a relationship and how much effort they are willing to put forth to achieve this goal.

I believe that if a provider and a hobbyist find themselves attracted to each other not because the sex is great but because they have common interests and goals then if love happens it just happens.

A real close intimate relationship between a provider and a hobbyist is by no means the easiest to have. There will always be issues that both of them have to face and handle together. The only way this type of relationship can work is thru trust, honesty, openness and, yes, a commitment to each other.

Let's face it, this is a business that allows the provider to pay her bills, take care of her kids and whatever else she has going on. But it by no means stops her from being human and wanting the same things that other couples have, just requires a lot more work and determination by both her and her SO to make it work for them.

Like the old saying goes, "Different strokes for different folks".

It all begins with honesty. Look at it as a job vs a life style. It's the sex thing that drives guys crazy. Beth and I were together for 6 years, it wasn't the biz that broke us up, it was the "aftermath" of the biz. I'm sure all of you know that most relationships start at the office. For that reason, you guys who are married or so's, I'm sure you know most relationships begin at work. For that reason, your lady may think you're fooling around at work, or her there. So, when you date a provider, you KNOW what she's doing. You don't know what's going on at the office.
Billy
The Wildflower Group

Well, the OP did ask the question, but I am amazed at how some of our answers are accompanied by statements supporting our opinions while also being written in a way to directly or indirectly find fault in the behavior of others. And need I say it ... rather interesting that such judgements are rendered by individuals who contribute to this particular board.

Open marriages work for a minority of couples. Swinging works for a minority of couples. A minority of ASPs have relationships with a SO, be it marriage or other LTR. I know some people in such relationships. We can say these types of relationships are not for us, but the evidence indicates that for some couples a sharing arrangement of some type can work. Do we want to judge these relationships as unfeeling or not based on love or otherwise inferior to more traditional relationships? Maybe they are, but how could we know?

But, to answer the OP, never having been in this situation, I don't know for sure if I could be the SO of an ASP. I believe it could work with the right woman, but that just defines 'the right woman.'

It all begins with honesty. Look at it as a job vs a life style. Originally Posted by BananaRepublican

BINGO.

A lot of guys fail to realize that THIS IS OUR JOB!

Without the money, I am sure a lot of playing won't be going on amongst the majority of providers and hobbyists. Let's be honest.

As someone who's eye is often caught by such threads.... I would say this one has flowed pretty well, compared to most. A little testy in the middle... but not bad.

I figure almost anything can be considered normal.... if you're strange enough!

I am about to blow all of your minds lol!

Honesty, I think what I do as a provider is wrong..always have. Does that make me a hypocrite? NO, because I am not preaching to others not to do this while I am doing it. I simply know in my heart it's not something I could do forever, and I know even more that one day I will in fact have to reap what I have sown...no one escapes that.

Society does not have to tell me a damn thing...my conscience and heart do a fine job.

I know im not a guy <sticking hand down pants to confirm> ok so yea im not a guy but i voted anyway. If I were in a serious relationship I would def not be doing this. Like ive said before.. this is about the love of boink with the bonus of being able to pay off student loans... lol If i were dating he would be boinking me 24/7 like a rabid monkey on viagra overdose. I wouldnt date a guy who was hobbying either.
I dont judge anyone that does, infact I know many marriages are saved because of hobbying.. What ever makes people happy i say go for it.
But.... i LOVE LOVE this boink with no strings attached kinda thing! So i think its pretty safe to say I wont have to worry about this question becoming anything that Id have to REALLY think about... not any time soon! Originally Posted by LusciousLacy

Lacy did you need a second opinion to check and make sure you are not a guy? I am willing to volunteer my hands to check LOL.

I am about to blow all of your minds lol!

Honesty, I think what I do as a provider is wrong..always have. Does that make me a hypocrite? NO, because I am not preaching to others not to do this while I am doing it. I simply know in my heart it's not something I could do forever, and I know even more that one day I will in fact have to reap what I have sown...no one escapes that.

Society does not have to tell me a damn thing...my conscience and heart do a fine job. Originally Posted by London Rayne

Yep! I concur.

Yeah I could handle it...been there, done that.

Love the new avatar LR