EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES

So you think the only men who are mentally healthy has to see us only as ASS FOR SALE signs in order to get laid? Originally Posted by Marshall
No. The mentally healthy men understand this is your chosen J-O-B....they don't go looking to get their emotional or ego needs met by you because they have family, friends and SO to take care of that.....doesn't mean they disrespect you....what service are you selling? I thought ladies were trying to sell sexual services in a friendly and safe environment...I didn't think they were trying to sell relationships[/quote]

For you to assume that no person goes untouched or unaffected from our interactions is laughable. For you to feel that the only effect we should possibly have on an emotionally stable man is with our manner BCD is laughable. To think that EVERY single guy who makes an extended date with a provider visit with us to fill an emotional NEED is laughable. I'm not saying that you're 100% wrong, but there are just different kind of men. Not all men are ruled by their testosterone. Some men don't believe in disrespecting women no matter how they meet them. Some men are cerebral. Some men DON'T have emotional connections with their wives. Some men DON'T have families. These situations don't make men emotionally unstable, it's how they handle them.
It sure is making me think....and take a good look at myself....I may not have the fangs but I recognize some "tendencies"..... Originally Posted by Ed Highlight
This quote made me pause and think about what are “emotional vampires” and take a good look in the mirror at myself. Thanks! I appreciate a healthy dose of introspection.

But before I could respond in lengthy and long-winded fashion…

your views sound so "new agey"....I have no doubt you honestly believe them.....

Since I'm a man and you are not, I can say that I've always found healthy men to be simple and straight forward, even when it comes to how they view sex...it definitely is not "new agey"....you certainly cannot rely on what men tell you because men won't necessarily be honest with a woman they're getting sex from [or want to get sex from]...the men you don't have sex with will disagree with you much more than the men you do have sex with.....

All opinions are judgments....my opinion is unbiased....there's no financial or other benefit to me that coincides with my held opinion..... Originally Posted by Marshall
I am a man – at least the last time I checked – and although a lot of my male friends would agree with you, I don’t. On your view I would say - different strokes for different folks seems to apply…most amusingly.

When I read Ed Higlights’ comment and the thread in general, I started thinking about my connections with friends and family and “people”. I’m one of those weird individuals that people just seem to like to talk to. On planes, trains, cabs…whoever is next to me starts up a conversation. Most recently I was standing at a urinal at a rest stop in Ohio and the man next me (is this too much information…) stated that this was the nicest rest stop he’d seen in a while. Then launched into how he was a driving a long distance and was a bit bored…and to make a long (or boring story) short…he offered to buy me coffee and we talked for about 30 minutes. He thanked me for my time, smiled and went on his way. This happens to me all the time and since I am never in a hurry and really enjoy talking to people it works for me. What I get from these are some funny stories, some sense of what people are thinking about and on occasion a new friend that I keep in touch with – from all over the globe. I met the nicest people from France at the Grand Canyon last summer and helped them work the gas pumps....but I digress.

Now this is not for everyone. My point is that people differ greatly on how approachable they are (the listeners of the world), the talkers, etc… When I read Marshall’s initial post I thought – that “emotional vampires” are people who take and never give back. I still think this is how I see it. But…there are clearly degrees over what some will give and what some want in return (sort of a tit-for-tat) and that is fine. We have to be comfortable in our selves.

Given my “approachable nature”, I’ve passed up on a lot of “free” sex. I know – clearly I’m nutters…or being some egomaniac…or delusional…see it for what you will. I’ve just tried to avoid those situations that I felt would be bad for the other person. Moreover, I for one can’t separate sex and emotions. Just didn’t get enough testosterone at birth I guess… As such, in this hobby, I like to get to “know” the person I’m seeing – simply because it makes me comfortable and it adds a dash of human contact into the mix – we are all people. But that’s me – not saying it is right for anyone else – it’s just important to me.

Oh, I’ve made my share of mistakes on this – you can ask the ex-Mrs. Cat… Interestingly she mostly dislikes people and so we were complete opposites… She is off to pursue her world and I’m back out in mine – which was summed up beautifully by Lauren. Thanks Lauren. Hopefully one day, our paths will cross.

Because someone seeks a different experience then yours, does not make them mentally unhealthy or unstable, or pathetic, or wrong.

Like the men who want more then purchasing an orgasm, some of the women are seeking more then a depthless exchange as well. I too seek more then just the exchange of physical activity for money, life is too short and I believe in sucking the marrow out of what life has to offer, delighting in every indulgence and opportunity to learn and grow available. I'm grateful for the variety in male motivation, as it opens the doors to a variation of females to participate, allowing all kinds to find pleasure in all the ways that pleasure exists.

The only unhealthy people are the ones who are cold, insensitive, abusive or manipulative. Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill
Schrodinger’s Cat
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  • 05-12-2011, 12:57 PM
Unfortunately Marshall, woman cannot live by marrow alone. Originally Posted by Ginger Doll



which was summed up beautifully by Lauren. Originally Posted by Schrödinger's cat
Except for this: .

The only unhealthy people are the ones who are cold, insensitive, abusive or manipulative. Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill
She can only make judgements on what is unhealthy for her, much like you were telling Marshall that he can only judge what is healthy for himself


Those are moral questions that vary from person to person. Some people are more compatable with cold and insensitive folks!

They are not unhealthy, they are unhealthy for you.


Here is a question for all.

Why do we all judge and think we do not do so?

Is it because we think there is something wrong with judging? It is how we stay alive you know?

To think that EVERY single guy who makes an extended date with a provider visit with us to fill an emotional NEED is laughable. Originally Posted by Marshall

Then let me ask this question:

What healthy need is a man trying to satisfy when he books an extended engagement?

Certainly on a 24 hour date there's not going to be 24 hours of non-stop banging [even "I" can barely do that! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!], so he must be seeking something besides sex....if a man is seeking intimacy, it seems a little creepy that he is paying for it when there's family, friends and SO to provide it for free.....not having family, friends or a SO to provide intimacy is creepy....the ladies say this is a fantasy, so paying for false intimacy seems creepy..........paying someone for an ego boost seems creepy to me also......

Another question I have is: Since many ladies forego relationships during their provider years, are they seeking intimacy and romance and other needs from clients?
Let's turn the tables here, Marshall: do you think the typical provider mentality is to think of you as just a wallet(which by your statements you feel like you are, but you just don't want to know it by her attitude. But what if you did? Since you're just getting laid it shouldn't matter.)? It's just business, right? What if there was no such thing as the "nice friendly environment" you speak of? What if all of us ladies REALLY were abused as children? What if we were all lesbians and really didn't enjoy men, but did this for the money? What if there was no such thing as GFE? Is this supposed to be the mindframe of a provider? I mean, either you have a wife mentality or a ho mentality, right? No in betweens? Either you're mentally unstable or not. A provider shouldn't expect a man to see her as more than a piece of ass, here to get you laid, am I correct?

I can only answer this for myself: I am single because I want to be. I don't settle for less in this world or in my personal life. Douchebags get no play with me. I feel it is important to have an outlet for my sexual desires, as I don't give it away in my personal life. That's why it's important for me to be comfortable and enjoy those I meet regardless of the situation. Why can't I be who I am, and if we have something in common, meet for a temporary connection, and move on? I do because I'm not a stalker, I'm just single. The people I meet do, because they're not crazy, and they move on.
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What healthy need is a man trying to satisfy when he books an extended engagement? Originally Posted by Marshall
Marshall,

Maybe he just has that kind of money to spend. Those that don't have access to such funds would question it of course. It is not all about sex for some and I respect that. I don't have a problem with those that prefer extended engagements. I do have a problem with mentally unstable folks / Men that blur the lines. Booking a long engagement has nothing to do with one's mental health.
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  • 05-12-2011, 01:11 PM
Either you're mentally unstable or not. Originally Posted by Tiffani Jameson
That pretty much sums it up!
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  • 05-12-2011, 01:15 PM
Booking a long engagement has nothing to do with one's mental health. Originally Posted by Naomi4u
But to Marshall it does.

That is not so hard to see now is it?

Why are ya'll trying to change his mind?

This is just a philosophical question that has no right nor wrong.


http://www.metalvideo.com/buckcherry...6bf13e2a4.html
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But to Marshall it does.

That is not so hard to see now is it?

Why are ya'll trying to change his mind?

This is just a philosophical question that has no right nor wrong. Originally Posted by WTF
I'm not trying to change his mind hun. We're just having a conversation love. I like Marshall!
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  • 05-12-2011, 01:22 PM
I'm not trying to change his mind hun. We're just having a conversation love. I like Marshall! Originally Posted by Naomi4u
I said ya'll, sorry Naomi, I should have been clearer. Tiff and Lauren and the crew sure seem to be!

Same goes for Marshall btw....he is busy like a bee trying to convince others he is correct.

An object lesson in futility.

Except for this:

The only unhealthy people are the ones who are cold, insensitive, abusive or manipulative. Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill
She can only make judgements on what is unhealthy for her, much like you were telling Marshall that he can only judge what is healthy for himself


Those are moral questions that vary from person to person. Some people are more compatable with cold and insensitive folks!

They are not unhealthy, they are unhealthy for you.


Here is a question for all.

Why do we all judge and think we do not do so?

Is it because we think there is something wrong with judging? It is how we stay alive you know? Originally Posted by WTF
I concede this point. I was making a judgment…a judgment not on what is healthy – but what I like or dislike about people – which I interpret as being healthy or unhealthy (more judgments) for me. Yes, just for me.

I don’t think that there is anything inherently wrong with judging. However (and – this is my judgment…opinion) – we should try to keep an open mind, discuss, and accept that some times people disagree. I’m simply not one for insisting that people agree with me or take my view on things – accept for this last part…of course...


Schrodinger’s Cat
Then let me ask this question:

What healthy need is a man trying to satisfy when he books an extended engagement?

Certainly on a 24 hour date there's not going to be 24 hours of non-stop banging [even "I" can barely do that! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!], so he must be seeking something besides sex....if a man is seeking intimacy, it seems a little creepy that he is paying for it when there's family, friends and SO to provide it for free.....not having family, friends or a SO to provide intimacy is creepy....the ladies say this is a fantasy, so paying for false intimacy seems creepy..........paying someone for an ego boost seems creepy to me also......

Another question I have is: Since many ladies forego relationships during their provider years, are they seeking intimacy and romance and other needs from clients? Originally Posted by Marshall
So the question is: what do you talk to a whore about in 24 hours? Having all your family members die off at a young age is creepy, not sad? Darling, looking at your posts on this board you don't want to talk about ego boosts...

You put everyone in a box. You will live in a box. I hope life shakes your box soon.

Point well taken, WTF. He is not my client, and that's a good thing. But it's not just him. But they're not my clients either. I will stop now.
Let's turn the tables here, Marshall: do you think the typical provider mentality is to think of you as just a walletyou make it sound like that's a bad thing and I don't look at it like that(which by your statements you feel like you are, but you just don't want to know it by her attitude.My criteria for a good provider is: attractive, sufficient menu, sufficient effort to satisfy me, honest, dependable, respectfulBut what if you did? Since you're just getting laid it shouldn't matter.)? doesn't matterIt's just business, right? yesWhat if there was no such thing as the "nice friendly environment"I interpret that to mean lack of respect....I'm respectful so I require it returned you speak of? What if all of us ladies REALLY were abused as children? What if we were all lesbians and really didn't enjoy menI believe there are many ladies who provide who prefer girls, but it does not matter, but did this for the money? What if there was no such thing as GFE? to me, GFE means menuIs this supposed to be the mindframe of a provider? I mean, either you have a wife mentality or a ho mentality, right? No in betweens? Either you're mentally unstable or not. continuumA provider shouldn't expect a man to see her as more than a piece of ass, here to get you laid, am I correct?she should expect respect and good client behavior

I can only answer this for myself: I am single because I want to be. I don't settle for less in this world or in my personal life. Douchebags get no play with me. I feel it is important to have an outlet for my sexual desires, fineas I don't give it away in my personal life. That's why it's important for me to be comfortable and enjoy those I meet regardless of the situation. I understand that, but this thread is about the men who cross the lineWhy can't I be who I am, and if we have something in common, meet for a temporary connection, and move on? I do because I'm not a stalker, I'm just single. The people I meet do, because they're not crazy, and they move on.yes....what's the point? So you have your head screwed on straight.....I never said you didn't Originally Posted by Tiffani Jameson
..
[quote=Tiffani Jameson;1289495]

So the question is: what do you talk to a whore about in 24 hours? Originally Posted by Marshall
Paying to talk to someone is creepy. Normal people have friends who will talk to you for free..........
your views sound so "new agey"....I have no doubt you honestly believe them.....

All opinions are judgments....my opinion is unbiased Originally Posted by Marshall
the first statement is a typical mobbing statement. As usual, Mr. Marshall. If you have something to say, then explain elaborate and discuss it. Just putting words as judgements up there is .... well..... on the level of a 12 year old.
what is wrong with "new agey"?

your statements about men just focusing on the sex and you viewing that as "sane" versus others are unsane are typical statements of a sexnegative person. You outsource sex in your life because "everything else" is good just the sex does not work. Typical patriarchals view of escorts. People like you are all around in that kind of view. That is one of the reasons why i charge for my services. Because the money is the kind of respect you are not capable to give.

Therefor i pity all secret lovers of married men becuase most of them have "secretely though" the same view you have. I witnessed that myself when i had the experience of going thru the turmoils of a marriage second hand and listen to all the bullshit my lover told his wife about me. Who of course officially never claims to disrespect escorts, but his behaviour does.
At least you are honest.,

But i do not condone your evaluative judgements. Who are you to say what is healthy and what is not? How come every - sorry - Idiot who has not studied psychology thinks he can go around and tell other people what is healthy and what is insane psychologically?
Do i go around and tell people about laws without being a lawyer? What is that?
Put your reference frames open before discussing judgements. For definitions of "healthy versus insane" something like ICD 10 and further stuff exists. No one needs your lay person opinion which is just highly judgemental not further.

If you are so healthy , then why do you need to outsource sex? Because youre surrounded by prudish people? Why is that? You say everyone has friends for emotional support but only sex needs to be had on a different level??
Wow?

Then explain to me one thing: How come i never need to pay for sex because i can`t get it elsewhere?



Sex positive people view sex as part of a holistic relationship