Drama, Highly Vocal posters, Disrespect, Trash Talk?... Why do YOU perceive ECCIE to not be a "friendly" place?

CRamsey's Avatar
Seriously I had no Idea I had so much power! TFF.....

If I or anyone on this board make you not want to participate then you have issues that you should address quickly.....

This is a message board on the internet and everyone has a fake made up name....Get over your insecurities already..... Originally Posted by Wyldeman30
True. But behind these made up names, are REAL people with valid feelings and opinions. Cyber-bullying is an awful epidemic in society right now. I am NOT saying y'all are bullies (I believe in some instances some of you are) but keep in mind that this board is a medium to express and exchange information, just because it's on the internet does not make it any less 'real'. I'm a firm believer that a lot is typed that would probably not be said in a social setting.

We are ALL entitled to our opinions; good, bad or ugly.

Someone not wanting to participate does not mean that they're insecure, weak minded or whatever other adjectives you all come up with that concludes we in some way LESS intelligent, secure, or valuable here than you. Perhaps rather than that, they are tired of bickering and responses that seem their only purpose is to start drama or create controversy. For example, whispers reply to darien's denial of BBFS, was that she must really be offering it. What??! If she didn't say anything, she would be prosecuted for not denying it, if she denies it, her response somehow subliminally means she DOES offer it. Let's not speculate especially on an issue that can damage a woman's business.

It never ceases to amaze me how these men can go on thinking they are doing nothing wrong. Not by board standards, but by society's standards.

I thought down's post was incredibly dead on, yet without fail, one of you had to comment on it discrediting it and calling him insecure.
Ahhh yes.... Funny you should grab a link by someone else posting under an alias.....

yeah... In the regards of having no tolerance in my life for a woman that cheats on me? Yeah I can admit to being a hypocrit.....

But what does that have to do with any subject or topic matter here? Originally Posted by Whispers
In a post, on this very thread, you stated the following:
"You will be hard pressed to find any examples of my being a hypocrit..... I stand pretty firmly with my views and personally am disgusted by hypocrisy....." (http://eccie.net/showpost.php?p=1931245&postcount=36)
My post shows that you were clearly mistaken as it was very easy for me to find an example. I don't know, and don't care who PDoktor is. Bottom-line is you posted the following:
"I can admit to being a hypocrite." (http://www.eccie.net/showpost.php?p=...5&postcount=12)

Here's another one where you stated:
"Yes.... I have no problem admitting I am a hypocrite" (http://www.eccie.net/showpost.php?p=376892&postcount=1)
So, are you truly disgusted by hypocrisy?
Seriously I had no Idea I had so much power! TFF.....

If I or anyone on this board make you not want to participate then you have issues that you should address quickly.....

This is a message board on the internet and everyone has a fake made up name....Get over your insecurities already..... Originally Posted by Wyldeman30
No insecurities here. Maybe instead of "participate" I should have said "deal with". Hey sorry if I ruffled your feathers, man. Let me just go ahead and make clear I really have no beef with you or Whispers or Sixxbach either. I thought I was pretty clear. Post how you want. I'm not some pussy aching to post on this site if only the mean, mean men would stop. I'm just saying that to me you guys don't make this a very inviting place for people. Whatever.

You all post a lot and you seem to jump on people pretty quick and Whispers sure likes to wear people down. I don't really care anymore. Just expressed an opinion. I have no interest in spending time on here with tedious back and forth arguments. But by posting this long, long, long opinion I know I'm asking for it. So go ahead.

I just think a lot of people on here are tired of it and choose not to engage because of it. That's the boat I'm in.
Whispers's Avatar
So, are you truly disgusted by hypocrisy? Originally Posted by JohnBrown7
Yup! I don't care for it at all.....

Ok... I can admit that I human, make mistakes and engage in hypocrisy. I think I admitted it in both of those instances.....

Neither of those two examples apply to anything wrote here on the board however. Or any use of the board. One was totally a tounge in cheek humorous tidbit as a matter of fact....

keep on digging if you like.... But yeah ... there are a few things I don't care for about myself....
WyldemanATX's Avatar
True. But behind these made up names, are REAL people with valid feelings and opinions. You giving people too much power if they hurt your feelings on the internet. Cyber-bullying is an awful epidemic in society right now. Guess how you kick a cyber bully's ass! Unplug the computer. I am NOT saying y'all are bullies (I believe in some instances some of you are) but keep in mind that this board is a medium to express and exchange information, just because it's on the internet does not make it any less 'real'. I'm a firm believer that a lot is typed that would probably not be said in a social setting. Most of it is crap. You should not put much stock in what anyone says on the internet forums.

We are ALL entitled to our opinions; good, bad or ugly.

Someone not wanting to participate does not mean that they're insecure, weak minded or whatever other adjectives you all come up with that concludes we in some way LESS intelligent, secure, or valuable here than you. Perhaps rather than that, they are tired of bickering and responses that seem their only purpose is to start drama or create controversy. For example, whispers reply to darien's denial of BBFS, was that she must really be offering it. What??! If she didn't say anything, she would be prosecuted for not denying it, if she denies it, her response somehow subliminally means she DOES offer it. Let's not speculate especially on an issue that can damage a woman's business.

Whispers is just always gonna push the issue especially if you fight back. Best thing for her to do is just say her piece and stop. The only ones that will truly know who is doing BBFS are the ones that are BCD doing it. I am willing to bet most are not gonna admit to it on either side.

It never ceases to amaze me how these men can go on thinking they are doing nothing wrong. Not by board standards, but by society's standards.

This is fantasy land not the real world.

I thought down's post was incredibly dead on, yet without fail, one of you had to comment on it discrediting it and calling him insecure. Originally Posted by CRamsey
I did not say he is insecure as a whole. Just said if you are giving anyone that much power that you would not post on a SHMB then well you may have a thin skin issue.
sixxbach's Avatar
.


and Ztonk.. "Those of you sitting on the sidelines pining for the "good old days" and the ones who just constantly complain about "Whispers" or "the attack pack" are really the problem. You just don't see it."

You're also far off the reservation. I will assume the moderator hat was off when you posted that? hope so. In either case I totally disafucking agree.

cheers

Highly Vocal posters, Disrespect, Trash Talk?... Why do YOU perceive ECCIE to not be a "friendly" place? ma, Highly Vocal posters, Disrespect, Trash Talk?... Why do YOU perceive ECCIE to not be a "friendly" place? Originally Posted by budman33
Z is on the money IMO. It has already been said before of course but members make the board what it is. When I had the time to post more before ASPD died, I was not made to feel welcome. I only did the street scene. Hobbyists and Providers were biased towards me and would not see girls that I would see resulting in ladies not wanting to take a chance on a review. I did my thing by posting SW reviews, commentary and offending quite a few in the process. I also read up on the board politics and didn't care for it. No one is going to influence how I hobby.

Point is, I didn't like the way the board was and did something about it so to speak. People hooted and hollered when I became a mod. I won't toot my horn too much but I did a damn good job. I do know how to be partial and at the same time help facilitate an enviroment for people to express themselves. Me being a Mod ran off TC2.

The "old guard" had its way with posters like me. As long as I am not dating anyone or get back with the wife, I will do my part to make sure that doesn't happen again. Once I am tied up emotionally, I am out this mutha.....

Not really sure what you want, then. If you don't think there's an issue with moderation and guidelines, then OK.

Do you want people with controversial opinions to sit down and shut up so as not to offend anyone? "Drama, disrespect, highly vocal posters" may make Eccie an "unfriendly place" but I would submit that heavy-handed moderation to remove all of the above would make it distinctly *more* unfriendly. Originally Posted by Vyt
I make no secret of being no fan of Vyt initially. He seemed to be a little more heavy handed. He then demonstrated he could be partial without being biased. The Austin Mods are doing a great job!

sixx
Down41, well said. Its a shared viewpoint.
davidsmith0123's Avatar
Down 41, +2
Yup! I don't care for it at all.....

Ok... I can admit that I human, make mistakes and engage in hypocrisy.
...
keep on digging if you like.... But yeah ... there are a few things I don't care for about myself.... Originally Posted by Whispers
I'm the same way.

And, the last thing anybody needs is for someone to kick them when they're down (e.g., calling them names, telling them they're stupid, stomping on their dreams, all while running they're (perceived) shortcomings into the ground).

Doing that shit is disrespectful.

I don't know about anybody else, but I can't be disrespectful and friendly at the same time.

I choose to be respectful.
Whispers's Avatar
I don't know about anybody else, but I can't be disrespectful and friendly at the same time. Originally Posted by JohnBrown7
Being disrespectful is one thing.

but lacking respect and being indifferent towards someone is something else.

I tend to both trust as well as show respect towards someone up front until given a reason not too.
budman33's Avatar
Edit...

Down41 Put it best and most eloquently. really nothing more for me to say... So I just deleted all the shit i wrote... yay!

... But.. fuck cant help myself.

Isn't it a tad telling that the only ones who don't perceive this as unfriendly are the SAME guys this thread and the one it was linked from was aimed at? Introspection isn't a bad thing and denial isn't just a river in Egypt.
Whispers's Avatar
Isn't it a tad telling that the only ones who don't perceive this as unfriendly are the SAME guys this thread and the one it was linked from was aimed at? Introspection isn't a bad thing and denial isn't just a river in Egypt. Originally Posted by budman33
There in lies the TRUE problem that NONE of you have been man enough to acknowledge and that is that SOMEONE took a shot at me/us and I/we responded.... You ASKED for what you are getting and now want to cry about it.

Rather then simply posting a thread and encouraging his supporters to participate and finding that it would probably have been left alone someone chose to AIM AT ME!

Sorry.. I always respond....

Someone point out the problem threads here in CoEd over the last 4-5 weeks please. How many problems have there been with me or Sixx or wylde or any of those you believe are the problem.

Interesting that most of the "support" from your side of the argument comes from people that do not review/contribute to the information needs of the board.

You want this place to be provider friendly and open to a gentler flirty coed but in turn you do not contribute to what it takes for it to thrive? what it takes to be able to ALLOW the ladies to post free ads?
budman33's Avatar
people post reviews daily. Your pearls of wisdom don't pay to keep the lights on here. Stop focusing on the last 4-5 weeks where you were a good boy. You do realize there are a few more weeks out of the year than that right?

You have done an outstanding job or leveling off your karma in the last month but not one day after doing so... there is this.

No one is crying. No one is whining ... well except you.
Whispers's Avatar
You have done an outstanding job or leveling off your karma in the last month but not one day after doing so... there is this. Originally Posted by budman33
Not true... This all started up because of a complaint about a problem NOT occurring at the moment or in the last few weeks and a direct shot at me and a few others.....

Rather than taking the opportunity to build on a more hospitable environment, aim was taken, a shot was fired and here we are...

If you keep pushing against those of us that simply could care less about the "Old Guard" as some mentioned...... Your never going to do anything except keep the temperature here high... the knives cutting..... and feelings are going to continue to get hurt.....

You defeat your own agenda.

You see... If ALL the providers EVER did was post ads...... NEVER participate in COED.... and the WKS never participated..... never had a reason to champion a ladies cause...because they could never get those pats on the head.....if they never tried to influence reviewers.....

Information would continue to flow.... the board would continue to grow and new people would continue to come along......

Boo hoo.... you don't like some of us.... we get that.... and could care less....

Boo Hoo..... some of the older women don't like to post here any more.... we get that.... and could care less...... others girls come along and take their place.... after all this IS a flavor of the month kind of hobby for most..... You know something? I wouldn't care if they DID post.... I care about a few basic subjects.....

Boo Hoo.......

quit all the damn whining and drop it..... start some threads encourage your supporters to join in and be supportive..... give something back to the damn place.....

post for yourselves....

let the ladies post for THEIR selves....

quit all the damn posturing....
MichaelClayton's Avatar
+3 I agree completely, thanks Down 41.

I'm just a newb scoping things out. It doesn't take long to see that this board has a lot of negativity on it. I also find the amount of chauvinism, even for a predominately male site, to be really high. Some people don't seem to have much respect for women, or for other people in general.

What peeves me too is the negative replies to reviews. IE "Can't believe you paid X" "can't believe you don't find her tats annoying" "why do you like these types of activities"

Seems like reviews are at a trickle - the same reviews always on the front page but they keep getting bumped due to discussions on them. I'd imagine a lot of people don't bother just to avoid the prospect of negative commentary.

Like Down41 said the site is still useful for information, but other than that it's kind of a drag.