('tis best tell an Irish joke with a wee bit of an Irish accent)
'Father', he confessed, 'it has been one month since me last confession.
I had sex with Nookie Green twice last month.'
The priest told the sinner, 'You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary's.'
Soon thereafter, another Irish man entered the confessional.
'Father, it has been two months since me last confession.
I've had sex with Nookie Green twice a week for the past two months.'
This time, the priest questioned, 'Who is this Nookie Green?'
'Oh, such a fine beautiful woman she is, Father. She is a new woman in the neighborhood,' the sinner replied.
'Very well,' sighed the priest. Go and say ten Hail Mar y's.;
At mass the next morning, as the priest prepared to deliver the sermon, a tall,
voluptuous, drop-dead gorgeous redheaded woman entered the sanctuary.
The eyes of every man in the church fell upon her as she slowly sashayed up the aisle
and sat down right in front of the priest. Her dress was green and very short,
and she wore matching, shiny emerald-green shoes.
The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and
matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart, but just enough
to realize she wasn't wearing any underwear.
The priest turned to the altar boy and whispered, 'Is that Nookie Green?'
The bug-eyed altar boy couldn't believe his eyes and ears but managed to calmly reply,
'No Father, I think it's just a reflection from her shoes.'
