Toys - Use a string please

TBone’s thread about toys motivated me to add a similar thread. If you use toys, tie a string to the end so you can pull it back if you insert it too deep. Too many people arrive in the ER with a sex toy too far to retrieve by hand and off to surgery you go.

Any of you fine people end up in the ER with a toy/object that needed retrieval? The best part is when people try to explain what happened. So doc, “I was walking around the house naked and slipped only to land on a lubed dildo that some how glided smoothly up my ass without tearing my anus and rectum...”
Brooke Wilde's Avatar
I don't understand how women get stuff stuck/lost inside of their vaginal canal.

I had an IUD inserted in my uterus over 4 years ago and if I insert a finger inside of myself, I can still locate the tiny string all these years later.
Russ38's Avatar

I had an IUD inserted in my uterus.... Originally Posted by Brooke Wilde
Fuck....Had to re-read that shit....At first glance, though it said IED.....
Fuck....Had to re-read that shit....At first glance, though it said IED..... Originally Posted by Russ38
Brooke Wilde's Avatar
Fuck....Had to re-read that shit....At first glance, though it said IED..... Originally Posted by Russ38
LMAO ... that would be one hell of a way to go out.
Dorian Gray's Avatar
Fuck....Had to re-read that shit....At first glance, though it said IED..... Originally Posted by Russ38
Same difference
LexusLover's Avatar
I don't understand how women get stuff stuck/lost inside of their vaginal canal. Originally Posted by Brooke Wilde
Alternative orifice.

A long time friend of mine was an emergency room surgeon with field experience as a corpsman ... who told me the most difficult surgery he performed with a straight face and without losing it (his composure) during surgery was removing a bowling pin from a guy's "rectum" ... bottom end FIRST!

FYI: When acquiring "toys" with "strings" one might want to make CERTAIN the "string" will remain INTACT before inserting it in a tight place or deep inside. You know? Like pull on it hard BEFORE INSERTING! Some of those rubberized connectors can slip off after some lubrication is applied ... natural or artificial.
Alternative orifice.

A long time friend of mine was an emergency room surgeon with field experience as a corpsman ... who told me the most difficult surgery he performed with a straight face and without losing it (his composure) during surgery was removing a bowling pin from a guy's "rectum" ... bottom end FIRST!

FYI: When acquiring "toys" with "strings" one might want to make CERTAIN the "string" will remain INTACT before inserting it in a tight place or deep inside. You know? Like pull on it hard BEFORE INSERTING! Some of those rubberized connectors can slip off after some lubrication is applied ... natural or artificial. Originally Posted by LexusLover
Maybe it was my first time to bowl in socks mate.

IED..heh.. have to yel 'incoming' at the appropriated time. 'Blowin' that pussy up to a new level.

Cheers
Russ38's Avatar
Alternative orifice.

A long time friend of mine was an emergency room surgeon with field experience as a corpsman ... who told me the most difficult surgery he performed with a straight face and without losing it (his composure) during surgery was removing a bowling pin from a guy's "rectum" ... bottom end FIRST! Originally Posted by LexusLover
Hmmm....wonder if health insurance covers that procedure....
Slitlikr's Avatar
I always make sure to sink a 3/8" screw eye into the bottom of the bowling pin and tie on a 1/4" nylon rope.
Safety first!
I always make sure to sink a 3/8" screw eye into the bottom of the bowling pin and tie on a 1/4" nylon rope.
Safety first! Originally Posted by Slitlikr
If you have a cross dresser, you have to remember the screw is reverse threaded or you could end up with a cross threaded cross dresser.
pyramider's Avatar
Fuck....Had to re-read that shit....At first glance, though it said IED..... Originally Posted by Russ38
Well, that would make our Brookie a raging river and not a Brooke.
Slcman's Avatar
Brooke, think of the movie Man On Fire...... The cop that was the President of La Hermandad (Lt Fuentes?) went out with an IED up his ass.....
LexusLover's Avatar
Hmmm....wonder if health insurance covers that procedure.... Originally Posted by Russ38
Knowing the surgeon he probably wouldn't charge just for the copyrights to the story!!!! He did say it was a "tough" surgery with no eye contact with the others on the team, some of whom were present in the hall way as the surgeon lifted the sheet up to see why it looked like a tent while the boyfriend was dancing around nearby shrilly expressing his dismay as to how it possibly got STUCK! A Fellini moment.