A comment made about "Risk"

"Managed" or not, the ladies here are at way more risk than the gents. Originally Posted by ck1942

I disagree CK.... I think the average guy on ECCIE is at far more risk than the average lady on the site.

Ladies are at more physical risk at times but that is a risk based on the business they have chose to engage in. They pretty much know that from the onset.

Ladies HERE....are at LESS risk than Backpage girls, street walkers etc as they have a community of screened clients to select from. Ladies HERE are presented a system and offered support from their peers to lesson the risk they take.

HERE... seems to present far less risk to ladies that have a system and stick to it. In other words being HERE lowers risks all around for a lady engaging in this lifestyle.

On the other hand.....

Guys can see Streetwalkers and Backpage girls and assume SOME physical risk but HERE...increases other risks to a guy

HERE...encourages guys to submit personal information for screening...

HERE... entails dealing with women that collect and store information .that often times is put in the wrong hands and costs a guy dearly....

HERE... can mean dealing with jilted lover's boyfriends and others that you don't deal with as often when interacting with the ladies in other venues....

HERE... may lower the financial exposure to poor decisions but professionally and personally HERE... favors the ladies and creates addition risk for the guys.


The majority of times we read about a lady that has been ripped off or hurt there is some deception at hand and often times a flaw in the process by which she conducted her business.


When we read about a a guy that has been ripped off or hurt it is the same thing. He was careless in someway and didn't follow an expected protocol that would have alleviate it


The majority of times we read about a lady that has been outed it is because of some jealous member of her peer group or her own carelessness..... Her position in life, her career and future is seldom destroyed.


When a man is outed it is different. He suffers the same embarrassment a lady will and the disruption to family is similar as well.


However..... More of the men here have educated themselves and charted a career path that can be destroyed as a result of their being outed. He can lose his business, his career and his family and be placed in a position of having to restart and carry the debts forward for years to come to support those he lost.


Now when a man is outed.... It is more often the result of the carelessness of a provider with the information she has available.... it falls in the hands of her husband, boyfriend or lover.... or in many cases a spurned lover....


The men here have far more to lose than the average lady and take on additional risk providing assurances to the ladies that lower their risk as a result of what being The majority of times we read about a lady that has been ripped off or hurt there is some deception at hand and often times a flaw in the process by which she conducted her business.


I will never subscribe to the thought that ladies HERE are at greater risk than the guys.


Give a guy a choice of a Beat Down or being outed to his family, friends and employer and see what he chooses..... Ladies have far less to lose in most cases.



I don't think many truly give it enough thought.

The majority of times we read about a lady that has been ripped off or hurt there is some deception at hand. in many cases a spurned lover. Originally Posted by Whispers

You may be on to something there.

W- Wow. Your so right. You should leave now and save yourself.


GUY chooses this: get ripped off, get outed, hurt his family, business, ego

society maybe chides a guy, but mostly blames the woman.

WOMEN chooses this: get ripped off, get outed, destroys family, possibly loses children get beaten up, raped, possibly death

seen as a whore, bad, something wrong, not worthy of respect, deserves everything bad she gets


interesting logic, if your completely self centered and filled with self importance

otherwise maybe unsafe for all, but women take more of a chance than guys in most cases.

Well im gonna go ahead and say your right and as a provider I go the extra mile and use as many resources I can to screen. Its the providers mentally and choice of how she conducts her bussiness. Like seriously I know we makes mistakes but COME ON! excercise your right to be informed SCREEN READ ALERTS INFO SHARE there made to help us. I cant feel sorry for someone that could have read the forums prevented the situation that happened to you. For example : "Dont see (eccie member) dangerous" and four rows down two days ago another provider said the same thing...-_______-
I will probably laugh at your stupidity and not feel bad- just saying
As for the men they are limited to the resources when looking up a provider. Providers have become so unpredictable you really cant count on reviews anymore she could have good reviews but show up and you caught a day so instead of seeing her you meet some gorilla pimp and out $250 pisssed off no happy ending. And providers lose good potential clients, clients decide to stop the hobby. Honestly I feel sorry for the men. Its becoming more dangerous then fun.
Just some personal feedback.
*Whispers you make vaulable points. If they take the time to read the things you say. There would be more positive then negatively. You push boundaries and lead not ine to follow. I will say I have NOTHING negative to say about you. When I needed advice or help& insight visiting austin I had to do was text. I really wish some of these girls would try to understand your method of whisper madness. I may be alone on this one but I lead not follow.
----IAMSUMMER

Well im gonna go ahead and say your right and as a provider I go the extra mile and use as many resources I can to screen.

Its the providers mentally and choice of how she conducts her business.

Like seriously I know we makes mistakes but COME ON! exercise your right to be informed SCREEN READ ALERTS INFO SHARE there made to help us. I cant feel sorry for someone that could have read the forums prevented the situation that happened to you. For example : "Don't see (eccie member) dangerous" and four rows down two days ago another provider said the same thing...-_______-

I will probably laugh at your stupidity and not feel bad- just saying

As for the men they are limited to the resources when looking up a provider. Providers have become so unpredictable you really cant count on reviews anymore she could have good reviews but show up and you caught a day so instead of seeing her you meet some gorilla pimp and out $250 pissed off no happy ending.

And providers lose good potential clients, clients decide to stop the hobby. Honestly I feel sorry for the men. Its becoming more dangerous then fun.

Just some personal feedback.

*Whispers you make valuable points. If they take the time to read the things you say. There would be more positive then negatively. You push boundaries and lead not ine to follow.

I will say I have NOTHING negative to say about you. When I needed advice or help & insight visiting austin I had to do was text. I really wish some of these girls would try to understand your method of whisper madness. I may be alone on this one but I lead not follow.

----IAMSUMMER Originally Posted by iamsummer

Why Thank-You.

The Jay Mustang makes some good points here

You forget one major key point Whispers............

Every single guy on here, is here by choice! When any of us make that choice, we take on the responsibility of the risks that come with that choice.

The hobby is equally full of risks on both sides of the field, we choose to take them!

You forget one major key point Whispers............

Every single guy on here, is here by choice! When any of us make that choice, we take on the responsibility of the risks that come with that choice.

The hobby is equally full of risks on both sides of the field, we choose to take them! Originally Posted by novacain

I never said there was no choice in the matter.

Just that men have far more to lose typically than the ladies and the anyone that has read these boards for years knows that more men have been outed and destroyed due to the carelessness of a woman than his own choices.

It does not usually happen the other way around

I never said there was no choice in the matter.

Just that men have far more to lose typically than the ladies and the anyone that has read these boards for years knows that more men have been outed and destroyed due to the carelessness of a woman than his own choices.

It does not usually happen the other way around Originally Posted by Whispers

Is the percentage of men with a lot to lose higher than that of the women.......Yes, but there are women here with every bit as much to lose as any man here. A man's life destroyed is the same as a woman's life destroyed.......... neither has a higher value.

As to the more men have been outed compared to women, I'd say that was closer to equal. Over the years, I've seen more of the women outed than the men but I still say its very close to equal.

As to the men being outed due to the carelessness of a woman............ she can't be careless with what she doesn't have.
It's everyone's personal responsibility to protect their personal information. That information gets out due to a choice made to hand it out, no one is forcing anyone to give it out. It's pure stupidity to think that info is safe in the hands of someone you found on the internet and spent an hour or more with, that goes for both the men and the women!

In a perfect world everyone on this site would practice discretion....................

THIS IS NOT A PERFECT WORLD ACT ACCORDINGLY!

Actually, every single guy I know personally who has been busted or outed has done it to himself. I'm sure there are others, but I can only speak of personal knowledge.

It was usually as simple as leaving an email open, or improper management of a hobby phone etc.

Is the percentage of men with a lot to lose higher than that of the women.......Yes, but there are women here with every bit as much to lose as any man here.

I disagree..... The majority of guys that are partaking in this are higher educate, further along in their careers, many are married and with families. The majority of the ladies are younger and at earlier stages in their lives, typically have not completed educations, built business and are not married.

Yes there are exceptions ...

A man's life destroyed is the same as a woman's life destroyed.......... neither has a higher value. I disagree. The loss to a woman is not as monetarily damaging and does not have the impact as that on a man with kids that might be paying spousal support and child support for 10 to 15 years....

As to the more men have been outed compared to women, I'd say that was closer to equal. Over the years, I've seen more of the women outed than the men but I still say its very close to equal.

As to the men being outed due to the carelessness of a woman............ she can't be careless with what she doesn't have.

True... but HERE has evolved to a place where men are encouraged to provide far more information on themselves than anyone ever normally has on the women.

It's everyone's personal responsibility to protect their personal information. That information gets out due to a choice made to hand it out, no one is forcing anyone to give it out. It's pure stupidity to think that info is safe in the hands of someone you found on the internet and spent an hour or more with, that goes for both the men and the women!

In a perfect world everyone on this site would practice discretion....................

THIS IS NOT A PERFECT WORLD ACT ACCORDINGLY! Originally Posted by novacain

I agree..... But the overly chivalrous attitude of feeling that the women here are at more risk than the guys is simply ludicrous.... IMO

Please send all of these uber educated ECCIE guys my way...

You may now return to your regular scheduled programming...

To try to generalize and quantify risk and worth comparatively is a tough task so while I can't say I agree or disagree on those points but in will say you make some interesting arguments... Like how this site encourages guys to submit personal information for screening... I have only ever provided one girl any personal info and that was to get my foot in the door and after months of research to find a reputable lady... Risky, yes, but I used a hobby phone and email, checked my own Internet exposure and nothing could tie me to her directly.

Since then, I have not had the need to give out anything other than basic physical Description, handle and maybe p411 info. It's a risk calculus. If you contact a sw or bp girl that doesn't screen, you're accepting some risk for the benefit of not providing any info other than however you've contacted her. I've never done so, accepting the risk of a modicum of personal info to one provider to open the door to see others without having to provide any more personal info to date.

Interesting discussion points... We all risk something and whether you're a guy or a girl, what you risk is just as important to you as what other's risk is to them so I guess I'm punting on who has more to risk... Guys or girls.

To try to generalize and quantify risk and worth comparatively is a tough task so while I can't say I agree or disagree on those points but in will say you make some interesting arguments...

Thank-you

Like how this site encourages guys to submit personal information for screening... Women and men alike with many simply being lemmings and not understanding what they are doing......

I have only ever provided one girl any personal info and that was to get my foot in the door and after months of research to find a reputable lady... Risky, yes, but I used a hobby phone and email, checked my own Internet exposure and nothing could tie me to her directly.

Not everyone makes the same careful decision on who to trust first and there are some ladies that insist on wanting even more information from guys that have excellent P411 credentials....

Since then, I have not had the need to give out anything other than basic physical Description, handle and maybe p411 info. It's a risk calculus. If you contact a sw or bp girl that doesn't screen, you're accepting some risk for the benefit of not providing any info other than however you've contacted her. I've never done so, accepting the risk of a modicum of personal info to one provider to open the door to see others without having to provide any more personal info to date.

There are many women on ECCIE that do not screen... For many asking for references is the extent to which they go.... Many see guys never checking those references and others never wait to get the references..... Their need to earn overtakes their stated policies...

Interesting discussion points... We all risk something and whether you're a guy or a girl, what you risk is just as important to you as what other's risk is to them so I guess I'm punting on who has more to risk... Guys or girls. Originally Posted by Netx9

What would YOU lose if you were outed to family, friends and coworkers? Do you consider it? Can you discuss it in even a generality?

What would YOU lose if you were outed to family, friends and coworkers? Do you consider it? Can you discuss it in even a generality? Originally Posted by Whispers

Very generally, You pretty much covered it... Given my age, education, career, family, etc,... Of course I consider it.

However..... More of the men here have educated themselves and charted a career path that can be destroyed as a result of their being outed. He can lose his business, his career and his family and be placed in a position of having to restart and carry the debts forward for years to come to support those he lost. Originally Posted by Whispers

I read your use of demographics to compare who has 'more' to lose or risk as a quantitative one whereas others, and myself, are adding the qualitative dimension to it. Do I have more to lose given my age, education, career, etc, (new car, house, job) than a single mom, little education (used car, apartment)? Quantitatively, sure.... Maybe.

Try this... Do I have less to lose than another gentleman who makes more money than I do? I may risk my ability to park my ford in a 3 car garage and ability to enjoy a steak at Texas Roadhouse while he risks parking his lexus in a 6 car garage in one of his 3 homes and miss out on Smith and Wolensky. Sure, quantitatively. But we both risk prestige, family, a place to live, money, etc... Qualitatively similar risk I propose. Given my age, children (custody) aren't an issue but a single mother living in a small apartment who risks losing her kid(s), apartment, etc, qualitatively I think has more to lose than I do. We both, however, apply similar importance to our own risks.

Of course, these are broad generalizations and I haven't even addressed the legal risks but suffice it to say, if I were outed, I'd probably not be able to visit san antonio as much as I do, if at all and that, too, would suck.