Being there for providers

Holy Jesus... I promise I'll never bring the subject up again. Originally Posted by spa999

You've be a member for over 5 years and had half a dozen posts up til now. Let's hope you've learn from this and don't post again for another 5 years!!

Holy Jesus... I promise I'll never bring the subject up again. Originally Posted by spa999

No, no. Listen. Don't take your reaction--or other board members--too far. ECCIE is like a little society, if you will. It has its givers, taker, its community organizers, its doctors, lawyers, accountants, etc. Some have big hearts toward others, some not so much. Some have a broader vision and some don't. Some things just don't work and our people tell us when that is the case. And they are often right.

Just because your thought didn't find fertile soil doesn't mean that it was worthless or that you are worthless. What it means is that it has to play itself out on a different field. What you suggested might very well work on a smaller scale, perhaps with you and your own network of providers. You'll find the difficulties, refine it or perhaps scrap it all together. But what the experienced hobbyists are telling you, and I agree, is that it could be difficult and dangerous at the societal level.

Personally, I've always had the idea that a ripoff fund would a great idea. A pool of money created somewhere, somehow for all the ladies and gents who get victimized by the hobby. It is a ideal thought but impossible to execute. So I give myself credit for a benevolent thought and move on. You should do the same.

We're glad you're here. Keep thinking.

... very sincere input. That is something I can appreciate.

You've be a member for over 5 years and had half a dozen posts up til now. Let's hope you've learn from this and don't post again for another 5 years!! Originally Posted by Ed Highlight

Totally uncalled for.

To the OP:

...And one more thing about being a 'society' around here. We, too, have our mentally disabled children. You'll want to understand their thoughts and comments with that in mind.

I worked as a home health care aide ( CNA) years ago in another state. I was a single mom raising a kid alone and my own parents were deceased. One of my neighbors gave me an old car, on my way to work it broke down. I ended up buying a bike and going to my new assignment after riding my bike there in the snow. An elderly man who wanted to keep his wife who had dementia out of the nursing home had hired me. He was shocked to see me riding a bike in the snow. Guess it made an impression on him.

He started hitting on me as time went on, I kept rebuking him. After a few months of this, I finally decided to go along with it. As soon as I did, he got real generous real quick. I knew nothing of hobbying and sex work. I couldn't believe how hard I was willing to work a normal job for 10 bucks an hour, but the second this guy sees my boobs he buys me a car, literally. Nobody had ever done that for me before. Soon I was his "kept" woman, it was between myself and his housekeeper as he was going after each of us hoping one of us would take the bait.

That led to a trip to Europe, 2 houses and a private school education for my kid. It also led to his relatives fighting for control of his estate before he ever died. He was not rich at all, he enjoyed what money he did have before he left the earth. I watched Suze Ormon and learned how to protect myself legally. I ended up in a much better position than I started out in, and I learned how to live within my means by being self employed and not taking on any debt I could not afford.

The day he died was a shock. The nun at the hospital brought me in to see him one last time. I bawled my eyes out, saying goodbye to a friend who gave me more materially than anyone had ever done and I was eternally grateful. I tried to honor all his wishes and distribute what he had left in accordance to his wishes. I think of him every single day, he has been gone 9 years. I had hopes and dreams of being self employed and living a simple, affordable life before I ever met him. He was the only person who believed in me and shared my dreams.

It is very difficult to know if trying to improve or change someones life by giving them the means necessary will be wasted or utilized properly. Some people have no respect for money or knowledge of how to keep it from slipping away. Psychological issues and mental illness keeps some people from succeeding, no matter how much money you throw at them. It is a very difficult choice to make, who you trust with your gifts and who you don't.

Getting back to the housekeeper I originally mentioned: Her grown kid had logged onto this man's computer and a tech had to be called to the house to remove the porn webpage that became locked on the computer. My own kid was already a gifted student who was well behaved and studious. I don't know if that played a part in which one of us was chosen to be mistress, but I can't help but think maybe it was. Some people are surrounded by drama and bad choices of their own doing and some are not. It is all about the company you keep, so bear that in mind.

Thank you for sharing this.

I worked as a home health care aide ( CNA) years ago in another state. I was a single mom raising a kid alone and my own parents were deceased. One of my neighbors gave me an old car, on my way to work it broke down. I ended up buying a bike and going to my new assignment after riding my bike there in the snow. An elderly man who wanted to keep his wife who had dementia out of the nursing home had hired me. He was shocked to see me riding a bike in the snow. Guess it made an impression on him.

He started hitting on me as time went on, I kept rebuking him. After a few months of this, I finally decided to go along with it. As soon as I did, he got real generous real quick. I knew nothing of hobbying and sex work. I couldn't believe how hard I was willing to work a normal job for 10 bucks an hour, but the second this guy sees my boobs he buys me a car, literally. Nobody had ever done that for me before. Soon I was his "kept" woman, it was between myself and his housekeeper as he was going after each of us hoping one of us would take the bait.

That led to a trip to Europe, 2 houses and a private school education for my kid. It also led to his relatives fighting for control of his estate before he ever died. He was not rich at all, he enjoyed what money he did have before he left the earth. I watched Suze Ormon and learned how to protect myself legally. I ended up in a much better position than I started out in, and I learned how to live within my means by being self employed and not taking on any debt I could not afford.

The day he died was a shock. The nun at the hospital brought me in to see him one last time. I bawled my eyes out, saying goodbye to a friend who gave me more materially than anyone had ever done and I was eternally grateful. I tried to honor all his wishes and distribute what he had left in accordance to his wishes. I think of him every single day, he has been gone 9 years. I had hopes and dreams of being self employed and living a simple, affordable life before I ever met him. He was the only person who believed in me and shared my dreams.

It is very difficult to know if trying to improve or change someones life by giving them the means necessary will be wasted or utilized properly. Some people have no respect for money or knowledge of how to keep it from slipping away. Psychological issues and mental illness keeps some people from succeeding, no matter how much money you throw at them. It is a very difficult choice to make, who you trust with your gifts and who you don't.

Getting back to the housekeeper I originally mentioned: Her grown kid had logged onto this man's computer and a tech had to be called to the house to remove the porn webpage that became locked on the computer. My own kid was already a gifted student who was well behaved and studious. I don't know if that played a part in which one of us was chosen to be mistress, but I can't help but think maybe it was. Some people are surrounded by drama and bad choices of their own doing and some are not. It is all about the company you keep, so bear that in mind. Originally Posted by cinderbella

Samantha Thom... you are the exception and the type of "aid pool" wouldn't be needed by a provider like you.
But reality is quite different.....there are enough providers that are less educated, self centered, greedy and selfish to quickly ruin any chances of this idea being successful. And then the stinking pimps...getting money from the fund through a provider just because they can. It is an interesting idea but too impractical.

Thank you for sharing this. Originally Posted by Old-T

+1

From each according to his gullibility, to each according to her pretense.

Samantha Thom... you are the exception and the type of "aid pool" wouldn't be needed by a provider like you.
But reality is quite different.....there are enough providers that are less educated, self centered, greedy and selfish to quickly ruin any chances of this idea being successful. And then the stinking pimps...getting money from the fund through a provider just because they can. It is an interesting idea but too impractical. Originally Posted by gladius82

Thank you gladius. I don't associate myself with other providers and I do not know anyone in my life that fit the description you mentioned....so I may be too judgmental to say that if you try to help them, you will only get drama, danger, humiliation, being taken advantaged of....the end result is no good. I may be wrong. But I think you don't need much education to have common sense.

I worked as a home health care aide ( CNA) years ago in another state. I was a single mom raising a kid alone and my own parents were deceased. One of my neighbors gave me an old car, on my way to work it broke down. I ended up buying a bike and going to my new assignment after riding my bike there in the snow. An elderly man who wanted to keep his wife who had dementia out of the nursing home had hired me. He was shocked to see me riding a bike in the snow. Guess it made an impression on him.

He started hitting on me as time went on, I kept rebuking him. After a few months of this, I finally decided to go along with it. As soon as I did, he got real generous real quick. I knew nothing of hobbying and sex work. I couldn't believe how hard I was willing to work a normal job for 10 bucks an hour, but the second this guy sees my boobs he buys me a car, literally. Nobody had ever done that for me before. Soon I was his "kept" woman, it was between myself and his housekeeper as he was going after each of us hoping one of us would take the bait.

That led to a trip to Europe, 2 houses and a private school education for my kid. It also led to his relatives fighting for control of his estate before he ever died. He was not rich at all, he enjoyed what money he did have before he left the earth. I watched Suze Ormon and learned how to protect myself legally. I ended up in a much better position than I started out in, and I learned how to live within my means by being self employed and not taking on any debt I could not afford.

The day he died was a shock. The nun at the hospital brought me in to see him one last time. I bawled my eyes out, saying goodbye to a friend who gave me more materially than anyone had ever done and I was eternally grateful. I tried to honor all his wishes and distribute what he had left in accordance to his wishes. I think of him every single day, he has been gone 9 years. I had hopes and dreams of being self employed and living a simple, affordable life before I ever met him. He was the only person who believed in me and shared my dreams.

It is very difficult to know if trying to improve or change someones life by giving them the means necessary will be wasted or utilized properly. Some people have no respect for money or knowledge of how to keep it from slipping away. Psychological issues and mental illness keeps some people from succeeding, no matter how much money you throw at them. It is a very difficult choice to make, who you trust with your gifts and who you don't.

Getting back to the housekeeper I originally mentioned: Her grown kid had logged onto this man's computer and a tech had to be called to the house to remove the porn webpage that became locked on the computer. My own kid was already a gifted student who was well behaved and studious. I don't know if that played a part in which one of us was chosen to be mistress, but I can't help but think maybe it was. Some people are surrounded by drama and bad choices of their own doing and some are not. It is all about the company you keep, so bear that in mind. Originally Posted by cinderbella

Thanks for posting this, it's rare bit it does happen in the hobby. I wont go into my whole story but one man I met while in this business changed my life so completely I can't imagine where or even IF I would be today.

How much did you soak him for?

Totally uncalled for. Originally Posted by Old-T

lol. Agreed. How about we just forget this topic was ever made and call it even.

What happens when a hobbyist needs help, single father needs a babysitter, is he to count on the.provider for help? Why do we have to ALWAYS be there for them, an intimate relationship goes two ways, not ALWAYS her way. I like helping people but I also need help from time to time and providers may be unreliable.

What about the provider that starts in this business and turns to alcohol or medication as a result of her not wanting to do this work? How do we help her? Best answer I think is stop seeing her, but what man is going to do that? Besides me, that is.