Guilty conscience?

I have been inactive hobbying for over a year, but a lady from my past contacted me the other day in need of a bit of help and she was going to be passing through SA. I was happy to help her a bit, but of course, since she was here I decided to take her up on her offer of, well, you know.

I decided to come out of retirement but upon the unveiling of each of us, I just couldn't. I really felt like I was taking advantage of her and I felt guilty for that. I guess you could say I felt like a dirty old man. (In my 50s). In the past I've had these feelings from time to time but always justified them because I figured I was an enviable client for these girls. I'm always generous, polite, clean, attractive, fit for a guy my age. Because of that I figured I was sort of helping them out and they were with a nice human being who treated them well, not a piece of meat.

Any of you other guys ever feel this way? Do any of you ladies ever feel this way about us men? (I don't expect you ladies to answer this publicly, but I'd really appreciate PMs if you have thoughts on this subject.)

This is as deep as I'm gonna get. LOL.

Thanks

PS When I say I'm attractive I don't mean that everyone thinks I am. But I'm a decent looking guy. Not trying to be arrogant at all.

I've met you more than once. And yes, your an attractive sweetheart. Stop looking down on yourself. You definitely don't look nor act like a dirty old man.

So since you feel that way about yourself, and choose not to do through with your date, with someone you already had known/met in the past. Let me ask you this.
1: had you felt this way before, when you met her? Or is this the first time this has crossed your thoughts (about yourself), with this particular provider?
2: since you chose not to go through with the date, after helping her out. Did you two make sure to work thing out?? so she doesn't feel guilty for not *taking care of you* after you've so kindly helped her out.

You (personally) know I mean well by being blunt and asking the above. I like knowing your happy.

I have been inactive hobbying for over a year, but a lady from my past contacted me the other day in need of a bit of help and she was going to be passing through SA. I was happy to help her a bit, but of course, since she was here I decided to take her up on her offer of, well, you know.

I decided to come out of retirement but upon the unveiling of each of us, I just couldn't. I really felt like I was taking advantage of her and I felt guilty for that. I guess you could say I felt like a dirty old man. (In my 50s). In the past I've had these feelings from time to time but always justified them because I figured I was an enviable client for these girls. I'm always generous, polite, clean, attractive, fit for a guy my age. Because of that I figured I was sort of helping them out and they were with a nice human being who treated them well, not a piece of meat.

Any of you other guys ever feel this way? Do any of you ladies ever feel this way about us men? (I don't expect you ladies to answer this publicly, but I'd really appreciate PMs if you have thoughts on this subject.)

This is as deep as I'm gonna get. LOL.

Thanks

PS When I say I'm attractive I don't mean that everyone thinks I am. But I'm a decent looking guy. Not trying to be arrogant at all. Originally Posted by barneyrubble

I've met you more than once. And yes, your an attractive sweetheart. Stop looking down on yourself. You definitely don't look nor act like a dirty old man.

So since you feel that way about yourself, and choose not to do through with your date, with someone you already had known/met in the past. Let me ask you this.
1: had you felt this way before, when you met her? Or is this the first time this has crossed your thoughts (about yourself), with this particular provider?
2: since you chose not to go through with the date, after helping her out. Did you two make sure to work thing out?? so she doesn't feel guilty for not *taking care of you* after you've so kindly helped her out.

You (personally) know I mean well by being blunt and asking the above. I like knowing your happy. Originally Posted by Wicked Milf

I had never felt this way before with her--but I have felt this way before just in the general sense about my participation in the hobby. Just a bit, not much.
We did talk about it. She assured me I was cool and that she didn't see me as a dirty old man. I think she used the term--in a nice way--a freak. LOL. And I did make sure she understood that this was about me and not her.

Thank you for responding. I appreciate it.

I feel you bro ... +1000 karma points

I have been treated like crap by some guys on here and they sad thing is........I know that they were doing it on purpose........I am so happy and grateful to all the sweet, nice, gentlemen who cater, spoil, and appreciate me.........some guys think all we do is lay on our back and suck d***. Girls that last seriously do have to be a strong minded woman and be smart about it.

I feel for the guys that get scammed or "used" as well. I would not be doin' this if it was not for the "benefits" but I have met some real generous and caring guys that I have shared alot of time with and have learned from(:

A huge thanks to all the GOOD guys!!

Aww thanks karla! Woman are such gorgeous beings in this world they should be treated like ladies

Barney Rubble......sometimes people just want to help, and don't expect anything in return. Most of us have helped someone just to be helpful and a friend. You're a good man!

@Karla.....sounds like you're a kind person too!

As WM said .....don't look down on youself.

Thank you kind sir!

Thanks Karla!! hehe

Then why did you feel this way, with her this time? Was it because she had asked for help?

And how did it make *you* feel when you've partook of the hobby in the past, and felt that way? Did it by any chance, hinder you from truly enjoying yourself with women? (in any scenario).
Because now that you bring this up. And the things we've talked about, in passing communication. I feel I now have a better understanding of you. And I hope those others you've met, do as well.

]I had never felt this way before with her--but I have felt this way before just in the general sense about my participation in the hobby. Just a bit, not much.[/B]
We did talk about it. She assured me I was cool and that she didn't see me as a dirty old man. I think she used the term--in a nice way--a freak. LOL. And I did make sure she understood that this was about me and not her.

Thank you for responding. I appreciate it. Originally Posted by barneyrubble;3033670[B

There are times when all a man wants is someone who will laugh at his stories, have a real in-depth conversation, and just have quality companionship.... I surely have those times as well... Sometimes I think that time is very valuable... Having that true connection with a person(hobbiest or just friend) is invaluable to me... Because I'm either dealing with my children or being a nympho.... So real conversation is few & far between. Sometimes being treated like a piece of meat is fun most of the time... But there gets a point where I just want the adult real convos.

Then why did you feel this way, with her this time? Was it because she had asked for help?

And how did it make *you* feel when you've partook of the hobby in the past, and felt that way? Did it by any chance, hinder you from truly enjoying yourself with women? (in any scenario).
Because now that you bring this up. And the things we've talked about, in passing communication. I feel I now have a better understanding of you. And I hope those others you've met, do as well. Originally Posted by Wicked Milf

It was not because she asked for help. It was largely because of a scenario I had planned in my head which seemed like a good idea but, like I said, felt bad in reality. It didn't bother her. In fact she said it was fun--different, and she likes different. Like I said, it was about me.

And yes, when I've felt this way before it has hindered my enjoyment. For quite a while I participated with one foot in and one foot out of the hobby, both relishing the taboo nature of the event, and rueing my participation. I think I'm still a bit conflicted, which is why I can't totally pull myself away from here. Plus, I love some of the conversations which takes place.

And DDMcGee--I agree with what you've written. Sometimes it's about being validated or attaining intimacy on a mental level rather than the sex. However, being a man, I've also learned that sometimes revealing oneself sexually leads to an intense intimacy.