Question for Hobbyist

Curious question for the hobbyist...

I have had a pretty active ECCIE member (15+ reviews) contact me about scheduling an appointment a few times. The first time he called He had given me a reference and sent me a PM to screen him with but he was one day to late, I had already left town, the second time I was booked in the time slot he had available to come see me. today he called and wanted to schedule an appointment, (I do not save hobbyist phone numbers in my phone unless they ask me to so I didn't know it was this gentlemen till he hung up on me and I looked at the past text messages between us). He herd the TV in the background and asked if that was the TV and if i was alone. I nicely replied yes, I don't travel with other providers and I am 100% independent. Then proceeded to ask what time did he want to hang out and if he was a member of any screening sites or had any provider references he said yes hold on and hung up on me. I know that he has had to have seen that I am well reviewed and very easy to verify since he had PM'ed me on here. I PM'ed him and asked what had happened? and let him know that the reference he gave me for him, he could use as a reference for me, that im pretty sure that particular provider (Ginger) would not have any problems telling someone I'm a safe bet.

Was it the TV that scared him off??... it wasn't that loud and if he could here it he would have been able to here the beginning show tune of Castle because that is what was on at the time. Just very odd... your opinions??
I wouldn't sweat it. He may have had a so walk in room or something.

I am sure he will probably get back to you
Who is this guy? Text me his info & I'll let him know that all is well!

This reminds me of back when I first started escorting about 5 years ago...

I mostly did outcalls & I'm horrible at directions, so I always used my Garmin GPS. I was often asked whether I had a guy with me because I had it set to the default male voice.
You seem like a lady who genuinely cares, and so I'm going to ramble for a few.....

First, I would always apologize anytime a date doesn't work. Regardless if it is because of you or because of him, always apologize as it if were because of something on your end. I have found doing this goes a long way.

In your first time scenario, if that ever happens again, I would say something like…
"I apologize, but I have already left the area. I did receive your reference and if you would like for me to contact her I will, but I'm no longer in [the city]. Would you like for me to go ahead and complete the screening process in the event we decide to meet at a later date?"

In your second scenario, if ever unavailable/already booked in the time slot a client wants, I would say something like…
"I am sorry, I have prior engagements on [Monday afternoon]. I would like to see you, is there perhaps another day/time that might work for you this week?"

In your most recent scenario, and not recognizing who the client was until after he hung up, I would consider perhaps saving numbers in your phone generic enough so to give you an idea that the caller is potentially someone who you've already screened, even if just one letter or symbol or number, something. Doing so might also might also be a way to give priority to those whom you've already screened.

Having a TV in the background, I can imagine how that might be distracting to clients. Some phones pick up background noises and make it harder to hear what is being said. To avoid this happening again, I would reduce any background noise as much as possible, may it be the TV, radio, or even making a call while driving, make sure the windows are up to avoid the phone picking up strong winds that may be passing through your vehicle. Regardless of how loud or distracting something may seem to you, what matters is how loud or distracting it is to the person on the other end. Even if not loud to you, if there's even the slightest chance it was the TV that scared the client off, then I would make sure the TV is never again the possible reason for missing out on a date.

Clients who hang up on providers, I would imagine they conclude… too much of a hassle, not worth it. Something that should be a breeze and stress free, if it becomes complicated, I can see where they might decide to look elsewhere. They were interested, they called. They lost interest, and ended the call. I don't think the client hanging up on you has much to do with whether or not you are a reputable provider, but merely the hassle in trying to arrange a date, or maybe someone walked in on him, maybe he thought he could make a quick call but when it turned into five minutes, maybe he didn't have five minutes, etc.

Now, with all that said, yes there is advice that could be given to the guy you are referencing, but he isn't the one asking for advice so I've left out the other side of this equation.

I hope this helps!
His cell battery could've went dead, lost signal, any number of things.

My background usually sounds like an African rainforest with my birds in the background squawking & singing, so I wouldn't worry about a little TV!
@ pleasantsurprise: Thanks for your input darlin'
I was just giving the jest of the story to get the point across not saying word for word what I said to him. I am very polite and apologize & explain everything when appointment doesn't work out,...
I do not screen someone if the appointment will not be set. Because it may be 1-2 months before they contact me again and anything can happen in that amount of time, and I would want to screen them again anyway so i will stick to not saving numbers unless asked, yes it may help with knowing who i have spoke with before, but more than not hobbyist have said they prefer not to have there number saved in a providers phone. Booking a appointment with me is not a hassle at all I have the usual process as any other provider.

@ scottprestons: thanks doll you seem like such a sweetie

@Ginger: I will text you his handle.. thanks for always being so great!
willro's Avatar
Like Ginger said, it could have been anything. Don't build it up to be too big of an issue. It was probably just something simple, and you will probably hear from him again soon. If it was an intentional hang up, he probably just stopped feeling comfortable at some point.

We all have our own insecurities and paranoia when initiating contact in the hobby world. I abruptly ended a conversation once when she started listing activities with prices on the phone. Sometimes someone just gets a little spooked.