calories burned during sex...

I found this on another board and thought it was cute......

Quoted--

Calories Burned During Sex:

REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent....................... ..........12 Calories
Without her consent....................... ....2,187 Calories

OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands......................... ......... 8 Calories
With one hand.......................... ..........12 Calories
With your teeth......................... ........485 Calories

PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection...................... ............6 Calories
Without an erection...................... .....3,315 Calories

POSITIONS:
Missionary.................... ...............12 Calories
69 lying down.......................... .....78 Calories
69 standing up............................ ..812 Calories
Wheelbarrow................... .............216 Calories
Doggy Style......................... .........326 Calories
Italian chandelier.................... ......2,912 Calories

ORGASMS:
Real.......................... ..............112 Calories
Fake.......................... ................1,31 5 Calories

POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging....................... ......18 Calories
Getting up immediately................... ......36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately...816 Calories

GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years......................... .............36 Calories
30-39 years......................... .............80 Calories
40-49 years......................... ............124 Calories
50-59 years......................... ..........1,972 Calories
60-69 years......................... ..........7,916 Calories *****
70 and over........................Re sults are still pending

DRESSING AFTERWARDS
Calmly........................ ..................32 Calories
In a hurry......................... ..............98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door..........5,218 Calories
With her husband knocking at the door......8,775 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door..........13,521 Calories

Results may vary.

Unquoted

Ha!

Of course i had to look up what the italian chandelier postion is - i'm such an old dood at times:

http://sexpositions.club/positions/126.html

Lol....love it !

LOL, love this!

That's some funny shit there Dallas! Thanks Hon.

Ok Dee,
Missing:
Rolling down stockings.
Tying blindfold.
Removing bustier.
Firing up an AED