Some things providers do that wear me out...

OK, I wasn't going to start this because it will be seen as a gripe session.

However, I became frustrated today with some providers' ads, showcases, etc., and here is my list for the ladies to please examine their sites and fix:
  1. Incall/Outcall. If you do only incalls, please say so plainly. Listing just incalls does not mean you won't do outcalls IMHO. So please, please, state up front you don't do outcalls. It will save you and me time.
  2. Donations. Please list the donation for your time. This seems pretty basic, but today I ran across 2 ads that said "call me" for the donation. I pass.
  3. Outcall fees. If you charge a fee for outcall, please say so, and then state what that fee is. It does me no good for you to say, "yes," and not tell me how much. If it is based on mileage, give the mileage rate, but also list the approximate point from which you will measure it. For instance: "Extra $50 within 50 mile radius of the Galleria Mall; extra $100 between 50 and 100 mile radius of Galleria Mall." It does me no good for you to say "an extra $50" but not tell me your mileage limitations, or tell me your starting point. Also, if your outcall rate is the same as your incall rate, please say so.
  4. First Method of Contact. I hate the phone and put off all phone calls until the last minute if I'm able to. Please tell me your preferred method of first contact somewhere. I prefer email or P411. But I have tried that as recently as 3 days ago with no response as yet. Makes me wonder if she's still in business.
  5. Complete Your Profile. I've come across listings on P411 and DC and Escorts that have huge holes in them. I don't care about the contact information so much as physical description and activities enjoyed. In addition to incall/outcall listed above, I would prefer it if you listed whether or not you did a BBBJ or a CBJ. I do understand the reluctance to list activities enjoyed, but this can be a deal-breaker for a lot of guys, and it saves everyone time.
Others (male and female) feel free to chime in. I'm sure the ladies have some pet peeves, and I've tried to make myself aware of them so as to avoid engaging in unappreciated conduct.
Others (male and female) feel free to chime in. I'm sure the ladies have some pet peeves, and I've tried to make myself aware of them so as to avoid engaging in unappreciated conduct. Originally Posted by charlestudor2005
Similarly, I'm frustrated by gents who don't fill out their P411/Date-Check profiles, or leave what I consider important information blank, such as if he smokes or if he's going to want to skip the conversation and just swing from the chandeliers for two hours straight (while not necessarily deal breakers, neither are ideal to me). Also, when there's not a single thing written in the details/about me/whatever it's called section -- argh. Same for the "tell me a little about yourself" part of my screening questionnaire. A lot of people seem to think that part is optional. While (I hope) my personality comes across through my site/ads/board posts, I usually have zilch prior knowledge about the person contacting me. Gimme something. Anything. Even just a note about what you're looking for in a date helps!

There's no way I'm dishing on my own juicy details, though. While YMMV is always present to an extent, with a little research it's pretty easy to find out what some of my limitations are. (Hint: No clown suits.)
  • thx
  • 07-04-2010, 08:29 PM
@Carrie,
I can imagine. I do wish that they had some sample templates for the 'write text here' section. For the first month of p411, mine looked like a mix of a resume and a dating site.
Now I think I have it right, it does not seem to matter, if no one looks at it anyways.
atlcomedy's Avatar
Obviously if people provide more info (on both sides) all the better

In the past you have complained/commented that you haven't had the best success rate with your dates, Charles. I'll suggest if you used the phone more as an initial point of contact you'd improve your success ratio.
While (I hope) my personality comes across through my site/ads/board posts, I usually have zilch prior knowledge about the person contacting me. Gimme something. Anything. Even just a note about what you're looking for in a date helps!... (Hint: No clown suits.) Originally Posted by Carrie Hillcrest
OK, Carrie, this post made me go back and review my P411 profile. I did change it a little, but for the most part, the info for which you asked is there. Although some of the tenor of the profile has changed.

By the way, here's a smiley just for you:
oden's Avatar
  • oden
  • 07-04-2010, 11:40 PM
I personally still prefer to speak with someone as opposed to texting
or emailing. Am I wrong; or, unless I'm being wiretapped, isn't that more secure, private and less apt to be saved and subject to data mining than phone conversations?
By the way, here's a smiley just for you: Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

Hahaha! That one makes me giggle every time I see it. RARRR! *chomp*
LynetteMarie's Avatar
OK, I wasn't going to start this because it will be seen as a gripe session. Originally Posted by charlestudor2005
Not necessarily. I think a lot of ladies appreciate receiving feedback as to what's frustrating/a turn off about their ads/websites. It's also a gentle reminder for ladies who may need to update their listings or have simply forgotten about their profiles in certain locations.

As for the specifics re:certain XYZ acts, I think many of us ladies prefer to leave those details out. Since it's fairly easy to discover these details via our reviews, many of us just let our reviews illustrate those specifics. (Of course, all reviews are works of fiction.)

Like Charles, I prefer email over phone conversations at least during the initial "getting to know each other" phase. During the daytime I'm simply not in a position where I can take or make phone calls pertaining to this area of my life--too many ears nearby.

However, once I have set a tentative date set with a gent, I enjoy having a 5-10 minute chat to get a feeling for each other's personalities. So much tone and personality can come across the wrong way via
emails/texts/private messages. It also helps to simply break the ice before meeting each other as complete strangers.

I personally still prefer to speak with someone as opposed to texting
or emailing. Am I wrong; or, unless I'm being wiretapped, isn't that more secure, private and less apt to be saved and subject to data mining than phone conversations? Originally Posted by oden
That's a good question...an attorney I spoke with at a conference recommended I NEVER have a phone call with a potential client ahead of time. When I asked him why, he responded with a "just don't do it." I pushed further: my phone conversations are limited to, "So be prepared as it's really hot and windy here" or "Which restaurant would you like me to make reservations at?" but nonetheless, the attorney insisted I do it all over email.
I'm still not sure why if we're keeping it to small talk. ???
(Granted I've never asked my personal attorney the why's about this, although perhaps I should now that I'm thinking about it.)
That's a good question...an attorney I spoke with at a conference recommended I NEVER have a phone call with a potential client ahead of time. When I asked him why, he responded with a "just don't do it." I pushed further: my phone conversations are limited to, "So be prepared as it's really hot and windy here" or "Which restaurant would you like me to make reservations at?" but nonetheless, the attorney insisted I do it all over email.
I'm still not sure why if we're keeping it to small talk. ???
(Granted I've never asked my personal attorney the why's about this, although perhaps I should now that I'm thinking about it.) Originally Posted by LynetteMarie
"All email" is a strong paper trail, especially in a legal environment. I like for the "they said/we said" that is firm and printable.
atlcomedy's Avatar
"All email" is a strong paper trail, especially in a legal environment. I like for the "they said/we said" that is firm and printable. Originally Posted by SR Only
I didn't ask for it but one of my work accounts (read as client that gave me an office)...all voice messages show up as voicemails in my phone inbox but also .wmv's in one of my email accounts...

[for clarity...talking about business phones only]
I personally still prefer to speak with someone as opposed to texting
or emailing. Am I wrong; or, unless I'm being wiretapped, isn't that more secure, private and less apt to be saved and subject to data mining than phone conversations? Originally Posted by oden
I was expressing a preference. It does not take security into account. Besides, most, if not all, ladies terminate all communication and contact, verbal or in print, if you even reference illegal conduct.

Like Charles, I prefer email over phone conversations at least during the initial "getting to know each other" phase.

That's a good question...an attorney I spoke with at a conference recommended I NEVER have a phone call with a potential client ahead of time. When I asked him why, he responded with a "just don't do it." I pushed further: my phone conversations are limited to, "So be prepared as it's really hot and windy here" or "Which restaurant would you like me to make reservations at?" but nonetheless, the attorney insisted I do it all over email.
I'm still not sure why if we're keeping it to small talk. ???
(Granted I've never asked my personal attorney the why's about this, although perhaps I should now that I'm thinking about it.) Originally Posted by LynetteMarie
I'm not sure if the attorney was concerned about LE or just anyone overhearing the conversation. For instance, cell phone signals can cross and you can sometimes hear another's conversation. Likewise, landlines may have extensions (maybe most do). Finally, the attorney may be in a state where the wiretapping laws are somewhat relaxed. For instance, if the "client" is LE, in most places he is allowed to record the conversation because he is a party to it without first obtaining a court order. It's why Monica Lewinsky's "friend" Linda Tripp couldn't be prosecuted in Maryland. As a party to the recorded conversation, she was allowed to record it.

"All email" is a strong paper trail, especially in a legal environment. I like for the "they said/we said" that is firm and printable. Originally Posted by SR Only
This is why my email is not descriptive. I try to keep it pretty generic.

I didn't ask for it but one of my work accounts (read as client that gave me an office)...all voice messages show up as voicemails in my phone inbox but also .wmv's in one of my email accounts...

[for clarity...talking about business phones only] Originally Posted by atlcomedy
A good reason not to use the work phone as the contact phone in the hobby.
John Bull's Avatar
I also prefer email. My hobby phone is not on until the day of the date and sometimes not until I'm on the road. I don't do outcall unless I'm in a hotel in another city and I don't text for the same reason plus I find it very awkward.
The single guys can get away with an always on hobby phone but us married guys can't unless we're very lax from a security standpoint or away from people most of the time.
I understand the ladies who would like to speak with clients ahead of time but it just isn't possible for me most of the time.
Similarly, I'm frustrated by gents who don't fill out their P411/Date-Check profiles, or leave what I consider important information blank [...] Also, when there's not a single thing written in the details/about me/whatever it's called section -- argh. Same for the "tell me a little about yourself" part of my screening questionnaire. A lot of people seem to think that part is optional. While (I hope) my personality comes across through my site/ads/board posts, I usually have zilch prior knowledge about the person contacting me. Gimme something. Anything. Even just a note about what you're looking for in a date helps! Originally Posted by Carrie Hillcrest
Seconded! Nothing makes a better first impression on me than a thoughtful and thorough introduction email. It shows so much respect.

At the same time, I've come to see lack of information as a still being information. For instance, if someone contacts me and they only want the shortest session I offer, and give nothing at all in the fields where they can make requests or describe their personality, I assume they're interested in straightforward physical interaction and not much of a connection beyond that. That is something I appreciate knowing, as the type of client I prefer to see if someone who likes to build an on-going friendship and for whom intelligent conversation is a must! Then again, I am very picky But I seem to get very lucky for the most part and have no complains about the gentlemen I see.
fd150's Avatar
  • fd150
  • 07-05-2010, 05:11 PM
do some guys realize that putting prices down in writing can cause serious problems if its a sting operation with LE...Trust me , I KNOW...been doing this off and on for
over 10 yrs and they will use everthing against you so be Careful.
They consider prices listed as solicitation.
Where is the privacy and discretion in that ? we keep mens lives private and their info and some expect us to pLaster everything out there...
it only takes one sting operatioin to figure out those abbreviations and one website has already been busted. Phone calls is not considered evidence enough for a guilty verdict. some things should not be written.
discreetgent's Avatar
fd150,

Obviously you should do what you feel is best, but no rates on a website will lead many gents to just move on.