Do you turn up the volume when touring?

I have been wanting to do a tour of Dallas, but I don't want to go when you're there, Ansley. I would love to meet you next time you visit Houston, but I'm afraid if I go to Dallas when you're there - all the good ones will be taken. Originally Posted by Nicolette Bordeauxva
You are to kind. But don't be silly, there are plenty of great men in Dallas. I think most of the women that visit stay in the Galleria area. I stay closer to downtown and love the hotel I that I stay in. If you ever need any pointers let me know.
I don't know why but I love a nap after my noon appointment. Originally Posted by Ansley
The best naps are after an orgasm.

I like the suggestion of trying multiple dates locally if possible. At least you aren't backed into a corner if you don't like it. You can cancel or reschedule other appointments. If you tour and find you are not comfortable with multi-dates you are stuck in that city/town.

I sort of assume anyone touring will be having more than one date a day (economies of scale! [can't use that phrase everyday!]).

So, 'Colette, when are ya comin' up north? I'd date ya! (but only if you'd want to date me)
  • npita
  • 01-19-2010, 05:22 PM
I mean, they expect to be the only one I see and I have no desire to be dishonest or misleading. Do they want to know the truth of why I'm trying to reschedule for another day, or is ignorance bliss? Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill
When I would see someone, I made it a condition that I be her only appointment for the day. I always asked how much time I had to book to ensure that. If I was deceived and found out about it, I would never have visited that person again. I would have been royally pissed off - enough so to post about it.

I guess the way to resolve your dilemma is to ask yourself if your clients are expecting it because they are paying a rate that is supposed to assure them of that exclusivity and then do what is right.
When I would see someone, I made it a condition that I be her only appointment for the day. I always asked how much time I had to book to ensure that. If I was deceived and found out about it, I would never have visited that person again. I would have been royally pissed off - enough so to post about it.

I guess the way to resolve your dilemma is to ask yourself if your clients are expecting it because they are paying a rate that is supposed to assure them of that exclusivity and then do what is right. Originally Posted by npita
Originally Posted by Ansley
I hear you, it can be feast or famine in this business. ....And just when you think no one cares, you get an invite for a week in the islands. Gotta love the ride! Originally Posted by Nicolette Bordeauxva
You're absolutely right that its feast and famine. Because of that, when I was an escort, I would be true to myself. Which - as not even an aside - if I'm honest, being true to myself I always found was the best way to be true to those who spent time with me.

Outside of a committed, exclusive arrangement, I never felt an obligation to be "true" to someone. Lets face it: they are going home to their lives and wives and preferred way of living after they leave, why should you do anything else but what is going to make you secure and happy?? You still have bills and children and everything else to take care of and however you arrange your life is your choice.

If I traveled WITH someone, of course it was an exclusive trip - 'ya go home with who brought ya' - that said, if I went to a city to see someone on Tuesday what I did on Monday or Wed belonged to Sydney (that includes the pool boy or an appointment or the museum)....caveat: when traveling on my own to see someone, I always paid for my own flights and hotels; I do think that if you are unable to cover your own expenses, your obligation increases. Typically - not always - women that don't cover their own arrangements are "working" the men and giving them one impression (deep affection) when I was always a fan of 'pay me my rate and I'll take care of my own stuff'. That includes being in charge of my own life off the clock.

Bottom line; do what feels right for your family, emotions and body. No one owns you outside of the time contracted.
I hear you, it can be feast or famine in this business. Sometimes the mail box is full of suitable suitors and you have to turn some away and other times you have to check your website to make sure the email address is still listed.

And just when you think no one cares, you get an invite for a week in the islands. Gotta love the ride! Originally Posted by Nicolette Bordeauxva
Haha! Hell yeah!

I actually in general attract less then other ladies of comparable expectations, my good fortune is that they become regular parts of my life to some degree. A gentlemen told me once that I'm very much a niche, the same way BDSM providers are. I don't know exactly what my niche is, but I think he hit on something. My only comfort is that those who see me aren't disappointed, so I don't restructure. I do get a little self conscious from time to time, but as long as things are going smoothly, I try to calm my self-doubt.

When I would see someone, I made it a condition that I be her only appointment for the day. I always asked how much time I had to book to ensure that. If I was deceived and found out about it, I would never have visited that person again. I would have been royally pissed off - enough so to post about it. Originally Posted by npita
It's pretty rare that anyone comes right out and says that's a condition. I would imagine and hope most would respect your choice.

I actually find with repeat friends whom I bring it up with, some say ignorance is bliss and I should do what's best for me, but they don't want to know about it. Some don't care at all whether they're first or second that day. Others expect that I'm the only one. It really varies from one gent to the next. It's always the fist contacts that I have no clue what to do with.

Like Ansley, if someone flies me out just to see them for an overnight, I'll see only them. If I'm going to stay longer after our date, I'll let them know and am happy to cover half the airfare. However, I bring it up, so I know which friends I can broach that with. New York is a bit complicated for me - I have a lot of strictly social friends there. It has literally become my home away from home. So any time I'm going to NYC, I *WILL* stay longer whether other appointments come in or not. It's easy for someone to be wrongly suspicious.
If I traveled WITH someone, of course it was an exclusive trip - 'ya go home with who brought ya' - that said, if I went to a city to see someone on Tuesday what I did on Monday or Wed belonged to Sydney (that includes the pool boy or an appointment or the museum)....caveat: when traveling on my own to see someone, I always paid for my own flights and hotels; I do think that if you are unable to cover your own expenses, your obligation increases. Typically - not always - women that don't cover their own arrangements are "working" the men and giving them one impression (deep affection) when I was always a fan of 'pay me my rate and I'll take care of my own stuff'. That includes being in charge of my own life off the clock.

Bottom line; do what feels right for your family, emotions and body. No one owns you outside of the time contracted. Originally Posted by Sydneyb
I had an outrageously infuriating incident with a gent who felt I was seeing a former client "off the clock". I wasn't, and the suggestion was insulting - because frankly if my relationships becomes personal, that's my own damn business. I couldn't BELIEVE the jealousy, and after that couldn't stand the sight of his name in my inbox. I'm here because I want no strings attached and assumed that was a two way street. The rare lunatic does seem to feel they have a right to tell you how to live your life.

I've actually had the good fortune of meeting the truly generous. Situations where I wanted to stay in town longer, and as an act of kindness they covered my hotel for the additional days I was saying based on the philosophy that "I give a damn about you, and if you can earn a better living, do it!" Those men are rare. Of course no one is obliged or expected to go to that length, but it is nice to know someone cares beyond the usual expectations.
I was very high volume and toured at least 3 cities per month. I would see anywhere from 3 to 6 men during my workday and my focus was on 1 to 2 hour appts because I made more money this way. I would get dinner dates but it wasn't required in order for me to tour any particular city. My touring days were always Tues-Thurs and my work hours was always 8am to 8pm, I was always back home in Los Angeles by Fri.

I would recommend always having monetary goals of what you wanted to make each month. I made anywhere from $20K-$25K per month and always took summer months (Jun-Aug) off.

I also paid a private service to do my scheduling, screening and hotel arrangements. I've been in the travel industry for almost 15yrs so travel was never a problem though I would get stranded flying standby at times. I would recommend always have a plan as to how you will spend and save your funds. I toured consistently for about 7yrs from 2000 to 2007 because I wanted to invest in property. I retired for almost 3yrs and just returned last Oct. I no longer tour and would say i'm very low volume now. If I could give one piece of advice it would be to invest, invest, invest.
atlcomedy's Avatar
I toured consistently for about 7yrs from 2000 to 2007 because I wanted to invest in property. I retired for almost 3yrs and just returned last Oct.
yeah that real estate market bit a number of us in the ass
I was high volume by HDH standards, but low volume by Houston standards.

I usually saw 5-7 clients a week. Mostly 2 hour appointments.
I only toured when I was bored and wanted to see different scenery, and never very far.. Austin, New Orleans, Corpus.. < 2hr flights.
When I was on tour it was usually only for 2 nights, and I would see 3 men in one day. Usually someone quite early (6-7am), a nooner, and 6pm -ish.. each being a 90 minute-2 hour date. Then I would spend my evening meeting other ladies in the area that I'd chatted with on aspd, or find a new-to-me Mexican restaurant (mmm) or just be a tourist for a few hours.
I disliked meeting new people any later than 8pm, *especially* when away from home. Plus I liked having my evenings to myself so I could explore the nightlife.

I only "toured" a handful of times while I was actively in the p4p world.
Maybe I could call Bagram a 12 month tour?
Nah, I'll be too tired to play.
Sisyphus's Avatar
Here's where I have a dilema. I have one short date booked that day, which is fine by me, I can go check out the city with my free day. Someone else writes wanting to see me that same day, and as hard as I try we can't seem to find another day where it will work for both of us.

What's the right thing to do? Do I tell him that I have another date that day and let him make the choice? Usually if it's someone I've seen multiple times, I'll bring up the possibility before the situation occurs, so I know where they stand on the issue. What happens if it's a new person, would they rather I took the date and said nothing?

I mean, they expect to be the only one I see and I have no desire to be dishonest or misleading. Do they want to know the truth of why I'm trying to reschedule for another day, or is ignorance bliss? Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill
Maybe they do & maybe they don't... the answer is as varied as the clientele population. Whether that's a reasonable expectation on their part is a whole other discussion.

I think you're asking a question you already know the answer to. Of course, you tell the 2nd guy what's going on & let him decide whether or not it's a deal breaker for him. Nothing wrong with saying to someone,

"I already have something set up on that day. Logistically, my other commitments don't preclude us getting together. Esthetically, it doesn't bother me! If it doesn't bother you, great! Let's make it happen. If it does bother you, I understand. We can do something on another day or on another visit."

If you're positive...yet direct...the answer may surprise you. Personally, I know if I were to make an appointment with someone visiting from another city, I'd have even less expectations of faux exclusivity that I already have. You're primarily in town to work. Anyone with half a brain in their head understands that.

Suspension of disbelief within the session is expected... it goes with the territory. Besides... it's kinda nice!

Outside the session... just kinda cheesy... and sleazy....

Just one idiot's opinion....
Here's where I have a dilema. I have one short date booked that day, which is fine by me, I can go check out the city with my free day. Someone else writes wanting to see me that same day, and as hard as I try we can't seem to find another day where it will work for both of us.

What's the right thing to do? Do I tell him that I have another date that day and let him make the choice? Usually if it's someone I've seen multiple times, I'll bring up the possibility before the situation occurs, so I know where they stand on the issue. What happens if it's a new person, would they rather I took the date and said nothing?

I mean, they expect to be the only one I see and I have no desire to be dishonest or misleading. Do they want to know the truth of why I'm trying to reschedule for another day, or is ignorance bliss? Originally Posted by Lauren Summerhill

Just my perspective but if I was in an actual relationship with a woman then I would feel I am owed the truth but for what this is I would think it is none of my business and the illusion of being special or the only one is good enough. Of course, that is unless I paid for someone to come visit including travel.

I like the way Lauren and Ansley view things. I guess their answers are part of what makes a HDH different from the other providers. I am sure many others work the same way, their posts are just the ones I saw in this thread.
  • Chloe
  • 01-19-2010, 11:46 PM
As an escort I saw too many when I traveled. It left me tired and drained! When I was inbetween I saw less but still drained. Now I try to see one main person. For the fact that we plan travel and board which costs money if the client does not have the means to do it himself (married or what not) I use a paypal account. For the long hours, overnights and weekend clients a deposit is necessary to make booking and planning that time worth it.
What if she traveled to your city just to see you? I have a friend in San Antonio that I have made the drive for on more than one occasion. I don't see anyone else but him when I'm there. Originally Posted by Nicolette Bordeauxva
Of course, I'd see a lady if she came to see me. I didn't mean that traveling ladies would be unattractive to me per se. The fact that she might have seen several men before me isn't hugely a deal killer in and of itself. My bigger concern would be the lack of energy and enthusiasm she might have after visiting with so many gents.