I Want a Dom or Master . but can't have one ...because ...

I want a good Dom or good Master so fu####ng...bad it's not even funny ...but one problem. I'm an Escort . A very good Escort . Doing well. Not just gonna give that up . Lol . . Most Doms or Masters ....do not do pay for Play... or ... donate to the sub/slave... they are seeing . Can I have my cake and eat it too ? ? How ??? Is the real question ..... How and is it possible ?? I can't exactly post all that shit .on my profile and showcase. It will scare all the vanilla guys away. Also I am not trying to take advantage of the Dom or Master Im with by asking him for a $$$$ donation. Every time . But if I get a Dom...or Master who ... wants me for free every time . All the time . Isn't he taking advantage of me ????? And trust me I've got a list going of the men... who want me for free. Long list. Lol....... No . Way !!!! Any help or humor or advice appreciated . Love yall♡♡♡ Naughty Jill♡♡.
mm-good's Avatar
Jill,

My first question(s) would be to understand what it is you are wanting from a Dom/sub scene (session).

No matter what it is, please make sure you have proper safety precautions in place regardless.

I do think you can find clients who would pay for a Dom/sub session but , in my opinion, would be different than a Dom/sub scene that is worked out between two play partners. In the latter, I have had scenes that took quite a bit of time to plan and lasted from 2 to 6 hours and then still another hour or so for after care and then some followup during the days post scene. If you are after the more intense sub experience , I think it is less likely you would find a willing partner who sees it as a p4p arrangement. Not impossible, just less likely.

One option that might be easier is to find someone who is willing to pay to have you sub with them at a dungeon where the various tools and toys are available as well as the needed protocols for your safety. No one besides the two of you need to know it is p4p but the dungeon would have safety protocols to help make sure things stayed within agreed boundaries.

Again, it all depends on what you are after.'
Jill, it's somewhat confusing figuring out if you are looking for a Dom/Master in a personal or professional context. Resources for pro Dommes are seemingly more plentiful, but if you are looking to sub and get paid, there are resources out there for pro subs as well.

I enjoy being a submissive in my personal life, but when I'm working, there is no ambiguity about if I am to be compensated. As for scaring away vanilla clients, I haven't really found that to be a problem as I get booked by clients who are looking for vanilla sessions as well as those who are interested in kink.

The Art of Submission is an awesome resource for providers who are also pro subs/switches.
mm-good's Avatar
Good info @Lena

I was curious about the sub's view relative to OP's question
sue_nami's Avatar
I'd say join fetlife and find a D/s relationship outside of work to get your needs met. then when u do this job it is a separate reality and u can have your D/s life as your escape and break from here. i doubt you'd ever find a worthy Dom on here to pay for your time and it work out in the long one because essentially you as the one being paid are the one in control and topping from the bottom does not work out long term if you want a sincere and working relationship to grow with.
Yes, Fetlife can be a useful resource. There are two groups on there "Kinky Sex Workers" and "Sex Workers Only" which have helpful information.

However, I don't necessarily think being compensated is topping from the bottom. (Just like there are pro Dommes, there are pro subs, and I've engaged in in-person and virtual sessions where I've provided submissive services and was still compensated.) I think it's less about topping/bottoming, and more about the personal/professional distinction. Which goes back to if the OP is seeking a Dom in a personal context, or seeking advice on how to incorporate submission into her services as a provider.
Thank u all . Good comments. Good questions . I want both actually. Pay4play.. and eventually a real Dom or Master of my own. Yes. I know that's asking for a lot..ha . I may advertise mildly on a couple of ads on Eccie...only. Not BP.... about providing ... A sub session . ( rates? . Holy crap? ) I have had very bad luck finding an actual dom or master who is on Fetlife. Who Isnt. Dead .dead .. 100% broke . Very bad experience for me to try to meet an actual Dom or Master in public ...and to find out that many of men in my area If not 80 - 90% or more of Waco fetlifers. ....wanted free sex......quickies. hit and quit it !!!!! Nothing good to offer at all. Not even a friendship . Or meal or even a possible relationship ? Very bad experience. So I'm nervous as he'll about all this. You people are wonderful. I'm so grateful for Eccie . And you !!! Love you !!!!! Jill. Xoxoxoxo.
Wish you were in my area Jill! I'm not an experienced Dom but have been interested in finding a p4p mate to learn the ropes. I would have no problem with paying for such a fantasy. I found one Sub with your attitude in my area. We met once and I loved it. Her ex found out what she was up to shortly after and she had to bail out of the scene to retain parental rights.

That was a year and a half ago...
Iron Butterfly's Avatar
For a sub provider to find a dom in this realm is not much different then a hobbyist finding a Domie here. Yes they both are P4P but the degree is different as the relationship grows. I have had a Domie (or two) and it ranged from basic session to getting told to leave a key for her to slip into bed when she wanted.

Search and you will find that elusive cake.

IB
No.Pastry.Please's Avatar
I can't wait until they perfect Sexbots! Which will be a week after my funeral.
HUMP!'s Avatar
  • HUMP!
  • 09-05-2015, 01:50 PM
Yup, that's the way it works, Pastry.
mm-good's Avatar
Jill,
Some good feed back on here for you to explore. I think the most important is to not give up and to stay focused on what you are after.

I also found fetlife to be a bit challenging to find what I look for in a sub relative to my level of experience.

If you are ever planning to come to Ft Worth area, let me know.....
bustybabygirl's Avatar
I am a submissive sugar baby/provider, I advertise that I am in the BDSM lifestyle and I would estimate that at least 80% of the people who reach out to me are Doms or are interested in being Doms. I have no problem finding dominant men to pay for my time. It's a niche market.
Bustybabygirl....you are freaking awesome !!! And freaking sexy!!!!!
bustybabygirl's Avatar
Thank you, lovely.