Blackmailed and need help

Due to some mistakes on my part, I'm being blackmailed by a stripper (possibly ex-stripper). mainly, didn't use a hobby phone, told her where I worked, etc.

It started out nice, I'd give her like $60 here or there, or give her a ride to work. But then I started hoping she'd go away, I stopped going to the strip club, etc. For full disclosure, I had told her "I really like you, we coudl be good together" blah blah. Typical back-room talk to try to get into her panties, ya know?

So one day she called for help, I said I wasn't going to help anymore, and she went off in a tirade about how I'm a jerk (yeah I s'pose) and that she had a video of us in the backroom where I did more touching than I was allowed (like that never happens). We agreed on $100 and she'd never speak to me again. We arranged to meet in public, I gave her the money, but she asked me to sit in her car, where I didn't realize but she videoed me.

So fast forward a few months, she contacted me again and said she needed some money because she was movign away to Vegas, and that she'd never ask me again for help blah blah. After refusing (since my last time I said that was it), she told me she had a video of us meeting, and had ran my plates and knew where I lived, etc.

That got me scared and at first I said, "screw it, just call my wife up then, I don't care anymore" but we negotiated an amount around $100, and she said this was the last time, promised, etc.

So now I'm living in high nerves wondering when/if the next call will come, if she actually had ran my plates, etc, etc. She can call me at work, still, since the receptionist usually just blind-transfers if someone asks for me.

So now I'm wondering what I can do? If it goes to it, is this something I can call the police over if she contacts me in the future? I was going to just let it lie as my mistake, and stop there. But if she contacts me again, I was thinking of telling her that the answer is "no more" and that if she contacts me again, or further pursues her blackmail threats, that I will report her to the police. Can I do this? I am fully aware that she might pull through on her threat and tell my wife, etc, etc. But at this point I guess I'm willing to deal with those consequences if it happens again. I know her Facebook, should I send her a message telling her my intent, or just say/do nothing until I'm contacted in the future?

I'm hoping Vegas swallows her up and keeps her there, but I haven't been sleeping well at night now.

Thanks, and sorry for the ramble! And yes, I know I should keep my hands to myself, no matter how encouraging the stripper is.
Bigh1955's Avatar
Sounds like you ran into a rather unscrupulous person. It's unlikely she ran your plates (IMHO)...unless she's tight with someone in LE who did it for her thru the DMV. Hope that she gets swallowed up by Vegas...as you say. But, chances are she'll come home when she figures out she isn't pretty enough or talented enough to make it in Vegas. When that happens don't be surprised. Her first stop will be you and your bank account.
There's three general ways to stop extortion (legally)
1) Tell her to go fu*k herself and then bare the consequences. Not a good option if the consequences lead to divorce, or worse a beating by her lovelorn, overtly large boyfriend.
2) Demand proof that she has the "evidence" she says she has - start with where you live, then tell her to produce the videos she says she has. If she does you're half way home...the extortion video is more damaging to her than you. If she doesn't, revert to step 1.
3) Hire a PI and attorney. Find out her real name and where she lives. Meet her in a public place. Have the PI record (video and sound) the meeting. Get her to incriminate herself. Your choice at this point - your attorney and the PI can apply some intimidation of their own, or turn it over to LE for further action.

It goes without saying, there are other less complicated and ultimately more private ways of dealing with this. Avoid the temptation, and limit your damages.

Good Luck!
Another cautionary tale about giving a hooker your RL info.

OK, I'll bite. I'm no attorney, but hey, you asked....

I assume that if you know her Facebook page that you have some RL info on her also. Soooo, the next time she calls, tell her that you've recorded the call, remind her that blackmail is illegal, that you know who she is, and if you EVER hear from her sorry ass again you'll go to the authorities.

Basically call her bluff and hopefully she'll move on to the next fool.

(Oh, did I inadvertently call you a fool? Sorry)
AngeLisa's Avatar
That's horrible sorry about your troubles. Shoulda read her reviews lol
gearslut's Avatar
Call her bluff. If she's only hitting you up for a hundred bucks at a time then I'd say she's got squat. Push back and she'll go away.
I don't think there is any recourse you have for being stupid, other than learning from your mistake. Don't contact an Attorney or call the Police. Just lay low and avoid this chick with a passion. Take your wife on a Cruise it might give you a sense of peace. Good luck.
Everyone makes a mistake (or two)... What you need to do is play her game. Whomever she wants to use the evidence to, you need to (lie) tell her that she/he is aware of whats going on. And you have reported or consulted this matter/dilemma (about her) to the authorities/lawyer and etc... She don't need to know that you are bluffing. She is uneducated stripper that's why she's doing this chit to you... and you seems to be educated, DO NOT level her on her low life level.

Good Luck!
+1 Bigh1955's advice. Get an attorney and be done with the bitch. She will return and when she does you need to put a legal end to it. I am sure the club she worked for would like to know she claims she covertly video taped customers and is now blackmailing them. Their attorney may like to know this too. Getting her name may become very easy. Let your attorney do the talking and thinking on this one. I have no idea on how to locate the best attorney to do this but someone that is sympathetic to what you did or goes to strip clubs himself would help.
Wow! I would definitely contact an Attorney...ASAP and get a Professional's advice. Your family...your job...and, your peace of mind is worth the call. They would have much better advice than any of us...sorry for your troubles...learn from your mistake...and PROTECT yourself and your family!!
report her to the cops, get an attorney and have her arrested AT the strip club informing her manager that she is blackmailing you.

Word gets around..

Also get some info on her.. dig baby dig.... sometimes you can find some info on them and instead of using it to keep them silent about you, tell them "ya know, screw the outcome.. this info is going public"

the absolute worst enemy anyone can fight is one that is willing to fall on their own sword than lose..... in other words make her try to go the distance....
Weekend marathon of CSI and Dexter. Handle your business afterwards
Roothead's Avatar
Just tell her that you'll be sending your east coast acquaintences Joey and Frankie over to pay her a visit
CharismaCaptures's Avatar
Go to the strip club where she works ,Do a cover up get fake hair ,a hat , weird glasses ,take a pic of her with your phone ,then when she leaves find out what kind of car she drives make model ,color and get the license plate # ,If you threaten her she just might leave that club and head to another make sure you contact the other clubs as to what shes doing is totally uncall for .gd luck !
I would tell her, "The penalty for blackmail is prison, and they aren't likely to put me in jail for touching you. I'm sick and tired of my nagging bitchy wife anyways, and for all I care she can raise our spoiled rotten kids on her own. They inherited too many of her genes and I'm sick of them too. I've been wanting to leave anyway. And I hate my job. If you want to help me out of this misery and go to prison for it, more power to you. It's all in the works anyway..."
CajunGent's Avatar
Deva Divine is correct. The penalty for blackmail is a prison term. A friendly call from the District Attorney's Office can put an end to your problem. I see your in Kansas - I presume your laws are similar there as those in Louisiana.