Yes, I sometimes require deposits. Ask me anything.
I logged on to Eccie today for the first time in a few weeks to find that I had been added to a list of providers that users here have been directed to avoid because we require deposits. I fully respect the rights of everyone who participates in this industry to follow (or not follow) whichever policies make them feel comfortable, but I do have some thoughts that I think might be helpful for clients to get the whole picture.
Some of this may be redundant to you who read my comment on that original post, but wanted to post it again for those who didn’t see. I apologize in advance for the length… but I have a lot of thoughts about this issue.
Yep, that’s me. I proudly require a deposit when traveling - it ensures that a tour will be worthwhile, and that I can continue traveling and meeting new people all across the Midwest. This is a policy I instituted very recently, after much agonizing about whether or not I might receive backlash for it, but I’m happy to say that my experience has been incredibly positive.
A comment on the other thread insinuated that deposits benefit LE, or is a sign of a scammer. Both of these arguments are, and I mean this as respectfully as possible, nonsensical and irrational.
LE goes for the lowest hanging fruit when they target people who participate in this industry. In order to attract would-be clients, their goal is to get you in the room. They’re not going to add any barriers at all that may make you think twice. They will lure you in with low rates, no screening, and no deposit. A deposit will immediately drop their potential pool of arrests *significantly*, because so many men are so averse to the idea. I implore you to ask yourselves how that would help them in any way at all when they’re running a sting? They don’t need any more evidence against you. Simply being in a room after responding to an escort’s ad is enough to charge you with soliciting sex.
Secondly, there is nothing inherently shady about requiring a deposit, nor will you get scammed just because you as a client pay one. Of the providers on the original list, I personally know half of them, and they are not scammers. Neither am I. We are professionals who are trying to make a living, to the best of our ability, and we have all come to understand that requiring a deposit is what allows us to continue offering the professional services you all love.
But I beg you - don’t take my word for it and DO YOUR RESEARCH before booking a provider! This is critical to avoid getting scammed, and to avoid getting caught up with law enforcement. You certainly *do* have to worry about getting scammed if you’re not verifying the providers you see. Before sending a deposit, or booking time, ask yourself the following:
-Do they have an active social media presence?
-Do they engage with their peers and clients in a way that seems genuine and organic?
-Do they have reviews?
-Do they have multie *paid* ads, across multiple platforms, that are older than a day?
-Do they have an active OnlyFans?
Not every escort will have every single element on this list, but by verifying their identity in multiple ways, you can be more certain that they are genuine. Law enforcement is not going to have an OnlyFans. Scammers aren’t going to go through the 30 day process to get verified on Er*s or P411. Neither of these groups will spend the $50-$200/monthly that most escorts spend on ads, nor will they spend months building relationships with their peers on Twitter.
These things are all evidence of an actual escort, who has spent months or years cultivating their online persona, and who would be unwilling to throw that away to scam someone out of a $150 deposit. Please understand that our reputations are worth tens of thousands of dollars each year. And even if a reputable provider *did* scam you, clients would have plenty of ways to air their grievances, like leaving a review or posting about it on Eccie or social media.
However, I would absolutely be hesitant of giving a deposit to someone with brand new ads, no social media presence, no reviews, etc. If you send money to someone like that, the only person to blame is the scammer and yourself for your foolishness. That is NOT the fault of every reputable provider in town.
If you have any questions about this, or any of the other “unpopular” policies escorts have adopted in the last few years, please feel free to ask. It is my opinion that these policies protect ALL of us who love this industry, and I would like to help dispel any myths about them.
If you read all this, I appreciate it. Have a good weekend everyone!
You brought up some good points. A few points on why people don't like deposits on short visits
1. No paper trail. They are used to using cash and therefor no paper trail.
2. If a provider cancels tour or appointment, still a concern on getting funds refunded in a timely manner
3. If you wake up the day of and are ill, is that considered a cancellation if you call and notify as soon as possible?
Also, if you are on 411 having OKs prove that you are reliable about showing up as well.
It also seems that hourly rates have jumped by a very large amount in a short time. So the question is do deposits encourage higher prices? If the provider rates would be lower maybe they would be having plenty of clients and not concerned about deposits?
I don't think anyone has a problem with extended 3 hour or longer times with providers wanting a deposit. It is mainly the short term visit.
Thanks for your thoughtful message.
1. It is possible to pay a deposit without a paper trail with many providers. For example, I and many others accept gift cards from retailers like Amazon, that would be completely innocuous on a credit card statement. Personally, I also accept deposits via prepaid gift card, which you can buy at any gas station or grocery store. Simply buy the card, load it with money, send a picture of it to your provider, and then for extra security, you can give her the physical card when you finally meet. You can also load these prepaid cards onto an anonymous Venmo or Cashapp account, and send it to her that way if she doesn’t accept them.
2. Getting cancelled on is a valid concern, certainly, but as I mentioned, you have many recourses in the event that happens. Writing a review or posting about it on social media can be a way to let others know about your experience. And again, most deposits are only 20-30% of a session, an amount that rarely totals more than $200. Most providers realize that a good reputation is not worth holding on to such a marginal amount of money, and will refund you specifically because of that.
3. In the age of covid, I’ve been more lenient with my sick policy to encourage people to be upfront with me when they’re experiencing symptoms. I can’t speak for everyone else, but in order to get a deposit back because you’ve gotten sick, all I request is that you show me some proof of that illness. A doctor’s note or a positive covid test, that kind of thing.
The thing is, ever since I’ve instituted a deposit policy, I’ve found that I suddenly don’t have clients calling in sick. No grandmothers dying, no car accidents… almost like perhaps some people were using it as an excuse to bail, lol.
4. P411 is not a perfect system, and I take all okays and all references with a grain of salt. People lie all the time, even providers, and I don’t know what incentives a fellow provider (who may be a complete stranger to me) may have been given to leave an okay or a positive reference. I also know that many clients will behave positively with one provider, and completely switch up before seeing the next, so again, the weight of an okay is diluted for me.
5. I don’t see much of a correlation between higher rates and deposit policies, except for the fact that both are methods a provider can use to weed out potentially disrespectful clients before meeting them. Someone who doesn’t have respect for my time, or the effort I put into providing a professional, warm, and clean experience and environment, is not going to pay a deposit. Similarly, in my experience, clients who don’t view my efforts as worthwhile are unwilling to pay a higher rate.
As for charging less money and seeing a greater amount of clients, that is a valid choice that works for many providers. However, I’m not one of them. I would rather see one high quality client a week, who shows his respect for my time and effort even before he walks in the door by paying a deposit, and is willing to pay a higher rate for a more relaxed, tailored experience. Personally, I find it difficult to connect with a higher volume of clients, so that’s why *I* prefer to charge higher rates. Again, there’s nothing inherently wrong with either method, but it is up to the providers preference. ☺️
6. If anything, the shorter visits should make you *less* hesitant, since the deposit would be so much lower, lol. A short one hour visit may seem inconsequential to you, but it’s a significant about of money for us, and to lose out on it at the last minute, after we’ve already spent time getting ready, or spent money preparing our incall, is still a huge loss. Especially when we’re on a tour and our daily expenses are so high, a cancellations of a short term visit can be just as financially difficult as a cancellation of a multihour booking.
Of course, everyone can do whatever they want to do. I just wanted to give you guys some more perspective on what goes into *our* thinking.
First time meeting is always a concern no matter length of time. Of course most people don't want to schedule longer meetings without a short one first to get to know each other.
No paper trail deposits just more hassle that is not always easy to do.
411 does not guarantee they will show . Have had many ncns from p4 clients .
Also I’d like to note I’ve never canceled a session booked with deposit. One tour I was about to cancel due to rental car shortage, all my meetings were secured with deposit. I had a choice . Cancel and return all deposits or take my personal car . Opted just taking the risk with my personal car … I only did this because I had the security of the deposits to know I could afford a tow and a way home should my car not make it.
First time meeting is always a concern no matter length of time. Of course most people don't want to schedule longer meetings without a short one first to get to know each other.
No paper trail deposits just more hassle that is not always easy to do.
Originally Posted by farmstud60
You seem overly focused on the convenience of a deposit, but that’s not the purpose of it. The purpose of a deposit is to give your provider peace of mind that you are a serious client, and that her time will be compensated even if you decide to cancel at the last minute. It also acts as a deterrent for the no good clients that make the industry difficult for all of us.
So yes, it may take you an extra 30 minutes to buy a prepaid gift card in order to send a deposit, but that is nothing compared to the out of pocket time and financial losses a provider faces when someone NCNS, or makes some lame excuse at the last minute. And it incentivizes good behavior - as I mentioned, clients simply don’t cancel when they’ve paid a deposit, lol.
It’s important to note that this is fairly standard in many industries. Event planners, caterers, hair or nail stylists, hotels, some medical procedures, all require that you pay some or all of the rate in advance. I’m not sure why it’s such a big deal in this industry.
I’m not sure why it’s such a big deal in this industry.
Originally Posted by MyaCalypso
The same reason discretion and avoidance of paper trails are such a big deal in this industry & not in others.
Anyway, this is just FYI:
Usually, I stay out of these controversial topics, but, since something very obvious to me doesn't seem to be so, thought I'd chime in..
Earlier in the thread I listed a number of ways to discretely pay a deposit, so this is not the explanation you think it is.
Beyond that, providers and clients alike are similarly concerned with discretion. If this was the only or even the main reason, our interests would be more aligned on this topic.