Just a dumbass, or up to something??

Alrighty...this guy called me an hour in advance to set up an appointment. I told him to give me a call when he's in the area, and he did, I told him which hotel to come to. I always ask the guys what they are driving, because I am just an extra cautious person. No one ever minds me asking that. But this guy flipped out when I asked him. So I told him it's okay, he could call someone else, I didn't feel comfortable. He called back and appologized, I explained to him the reasoning for this. He said he understood, so I agreed to still see him. Afterall, he is a newbie, so I wanted to give him a chance. I asked him to park in a specific place when he arrived. I don't like for everyone to go through the lobby all the time, I obviously don't want to attract attention to myself. I don't even like to give out my room number unless I have seen the guy before. So I normally have them meet me at a side door, sometimes in other places, where I have already scoped out there are no cameras or anything. He calls and says he's out there, I tell him give me a sec, and I'll come open the door(you need a key). I go to let him in...there is no red mustang anywhere, and no guy. I call him and he says he's waiting by the elevator! What the hell!? Who told you to come inside and wait by the damn elevator?! I was just too uncomfortable. He called back and said he would kiss my feet or whatever it took to see me. I told him no thanks.

Am I being the weirdo, lol, or is he?

Another reason why I don't do incalls. Other than the obvious LE issues there is occasional confusion like this. I understand the guys reservation about his car being a newbie. For all he knew there was some big dude waiting to beat the shit out of him and rob him. I can see the providers point of view as anything that goes different than expected makes her immediately think something is wrong. After reading the story I don't think either party was a danger in anyway but that's me standing back and looking at it and not being the ones to experience it.

He didn't follow directions. Doesn't that just piss ya off? He's not a warrior so fuck'em

Thanks for your imput. I just end it all when I start to feel weird. A few hundred bucks just isn't worth it to me. & I totally get the no incall thing. I ONLY offer incall when I am on tour, and never when I'm at home. But I am VERY careful about who I invite over...obviously lol!

He didn't follow directions. Doesn't that just piss ya off? He's not a warrior so fuck'em Originally Posted by acp5762

Nope...he's not a warrior so don't fuck 'em.

I would have passed as well, Holly ...but...

Sometimes, instead of just instruction - you gotta tell why along with instruction. And guys, whatever she says is how she needs it to be. Every lady has a reason why she handles her business a particular way. It is NOT just arbitrary BS.

Newbie (no refs I take it?) wants an immediate date, contact & schedule all through phone? Nope not me. Lord love you ladies who do - I have tried, just can't bring my self to do it. Booking a date that way then yeah...you did it all the correct way.

I would have refused to see him based on the fact that he didn't just enter the hotel, nor was he even in the lobby or lounge area, but was standing in front of the elevators on his phone going "Yeah, what room are you in?" <- That alone would have killed it for me, girl.

Just figure that now maybe he knows what not to do & maybe he'll do better next time.

Newbie (no refs I take it?) wants an immediate date, contact & schedule all through phone? Nope not me. Lord love you ladies who do - I have tried, just can't bring my self to do it. Booking a date that way then yeah...you did it all the correct way. Originally Posted by babee

Correct, all phone, no refs, said it was his first time. He did give me an hour notice. I try to be nice and give these newbies a chance...everyone has to start somewhere. I myself would rather hear their voice. Being that I pretty much answer phones for a living...after awhile you can tell a lot by a person's voice, tone, what they say, & how they say it. Plus to hear what's going on in the background is sometimes helpful to me. You can't get all of that perspective from words on a screen, in my opinion. Can I ask why you prefer no phone calls?

I wouldn't have seen him either. That is up there with the worse thing they could do - stand by the lobby and ask "What room are you in" oh and it's even worse when they say "Oh 209 - coming right up". Thanks goodness I only see two a day when I tour. If not, just imagine about 5-6 guys standing by the lobby saying "Oh 209 - coming right up". That wouldn't end well .

I would have never agreed to meet him in the first place with no info. other than a phone call, but that's just me. I think you getting spooked was a sure sign something would have went down.

Ok This threads done Holly gets it now, lol. Don't ya Holly.

Screening? As a newbie I have recently dealt with the hassles of trying to get an appointment with the lady I really wanted to see because of her screening requirements. I would never expect someone to meet me without P411 or referals or something that gave them confidence that they would be safe. I would actually be leary of meeting a lady that did not screen since that would mean I might be at risk.

I think it was just a lack of communication. Some girl make us guys jump a bunch of hoops and hurdles and yet some girls are worth doing that for. I think if the guy really wanted to see you that bad, he would have just followed instructions and been done with it. Just my 2 cents.

I think we have a consensus that you shouldn't have made the date in the first place.

I think we have a consensus that you shouldn't have made the date in the first place. Originally Posted by FlectiNonFrangi

No, I did not say that. It'll be a cold day when I tell someone how to handle their business. I said that I don't do cold call dates. <-and that is my business.

I said given the circumstances of the date, she was spot on.

Can I ask why you prefer no phone calls? Originally Posted by xxxHolly

Yep and I'll even answer. I started in '08. I did not begin in the age of phones, but rather in the age of DC, aspd, TBD - the internet. That is how I learned to screen. Go with what you know, ya know? I tried posting my phone & screening that way recently and just No. Not for me. I give my number out after screening and I screen via email only.

Don't get me started on text. Or pms.

The date you described - yeah you bet I'd have been nervous as a cat and I would have done pretty much everything as you did.

Whatever works for you; works for you.

You were not at fault, only moreso because he was a newbie. If you asked him to attempt a cartwheel in front of your hotel door for entry he should have did it.

Now as far as doing an incall and getting told where to specifically go and what brand of car I have for a client with references and verified......it would have been overkill. If she can't trust my refs or p411 I'm not gonna go through to many hoops personally before I just decline the meet; but I also never do incalls....so I do what works for me.

I wouldn't have given you the description of my car or followed your instructions on where to park even if I was a newbie. How you screen and who you see is your business but look at it from his perspective. He is most likely very nervous going to see you and at the last minute you lay the car and parking shit on him. My first thought would be I'm being set up for something. Could be someone will break in to my car while I'm in the room. Maybe you're LE and they want to cover all their bases. Maybe you want to get my plate number so you can get my true identity. Or as Burk said maybe someone is waiting around the corner to kick my ass. I know you providers are taking a risk each and evry time you see a new hobbyist but the hobbyist have just as many concerns as you. Not only are they worried about LE they are also walking into a room where they have no idea if somebody is hiding in the bathroom. I have been doing this for quite some time and I still get neverous and apprehensive when seeing a provider for the first time regardless of her reputation.